Parents, carers and disabled parents
If this is your first visit, check out the community guide. You will have to Join us or Sign in before you can post.

Autism and learning to become independent....

PaulieMacPaulieMac Member Posts: 4 Listener
My son will soon be moving out of his family home to start a new life independently, he will have some care and will be living in his own home in our local town. He is 26 now so its a good time for him to make the step to becoming independent to a degree.... Its going to be a tough move for him and we want to make this as smooth as possible. Has anyone had any experience of this and any good words of advice?

Replies

  • Blue FrogBlue Frog Member Posts: 373 Pioneering
    Hi, my brother has a learning disability and autism and he moved into his own flat four years ago, with some support via direct payments. He was 28. We (my mum and I) were really worried about it, but he has done amazingly well and he loves it.

    One thing we find really really useful is his iPad, this is brilliant because he finds it hard to describe things - he rang one day saying his kitchen was on fire, but a quick Face Time call showed us it was just a bit of cheese on his grill smoking, and we didn't need the fire brigade!
  • Blue FrogBlue Frog Member Posts: 373 Pioneering
    Labels are another thing we find helpful (though depends on how well your son can read)
    and we have them saying things like 'don't put metal in here' on the microwave, and names of the appliances on all his plugs. He helped decide what they say and stuck them on.

    We have got a machine a bit like this....

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/Brother-GL-200-P-Touch-Label-Printer/dp/B000KPFLAY/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1411128985&sr=8-5&keywords=brother+label+printer

  • PaulieMacPaulieMac Member Posts: 4 Listener
    My son will have some care to assist him at the outset along with night time support also. Our aim is to eventually have another like minded person to share the cost of the care, but its early days yet, we'll just have to see how it goes. I liked the Ipad idea so we may well try that too! Thanks for your reply
  • EllaBEllaB Member Posts: 35 Listener
    My older brother has just moved into a small group home close to my parents' house, and it has given him a real boost. We all worried, as a family, about how he would cope, as he had lived with my parents most of his life (he is now 58 and they are in their 80's). Now, I think we should have done it sooner! Away from my parents, he has become a lot more independent, simply because they're not there, automatically doing things for him. He's really enjoying the stimulation of being in a new environment and feeling a bit more in control of when he eats, goes to bed etc. I think the more you do for them, the more they rely on you. You will probably be surprised by how well your son manages. Hope it goes well. Let us know how he gets on!
  • sandrawmsandrawm Member Posts: 4
    It's such a worry isn't it. My son is 21. I can't even contemplate that step yet. So well sone you. I can't imagine me feeling anything is good enough but hope to find a couple of local like minded people to maybe rent somewhere appropriate n sort care needs between us and share responsibility of over seeing it. But it's all pie in the sky at the moment
  • PaulieMacPaulieMac Member Posts: 4 Listener
    My son has been in now for his first month and things seem to be going fairly well, its early days yet as he has to get to know his carers so time will tell, however the first big step has been made towards his independence...
    The first step in all this is to get the social services to assess your sons requirements. You must push them and keep saying your son needs an independent life and they must support this. This was massively difficult and took a lot of time to push them into action but we did it and got the care assessment and ultimately the care hours we needed. Start now and just don't give up!
    I can certainly help you if you need advice..
  • sandrawmsandrawm Member Posts: 4
    Thank you Pauline. It's always good to hear of the positives rather than the horror stories that we often hear! I'm glad your son is doing so well. I know how it works with social services- push push push ! I'm not ready yet and nor is he but I know these things take a long time to put into place so appreciate you advice. Thank you x
  • PaulieMacPaulieMac Member Posts: 4 Listener
    ha ha its Paul actually....;-)
  • sandrawmsandrawm Member Posts: 4
    Soz. Assumption and no glasses on !
Sign in or join us to comment.