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so sad tonight

woodbinewoodbine Member Posts: 3,719 Disability Gamechanger
Have just been told that my dad who is 86 is now to receive "end of life care", we lost mum 3 years ago and I know he will be pleased to join her, odd really as he's an atheist, so it looks like at the age of 60 I'm about to become an orphan. Its such a shame that we are losing his generation, worked from 15 til he retired did his national service, was a loving caring compassionate father and was besotted with mum for over 60 years of happily married life.
I will miss him.
my advice is given freely and is correct to the best of my knowledge.

Replies

  • Ami2301Ami2301 Member Posts: 7,428 Disability Gamechanger
    So sorry to hear this @woodbine Thinking of you ❤
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • PennywrenPennywren Member Posts: 15 Courageous
    Hugs x that hard place to be xx try to give urself room to feel what you going to feel and don't be hard on yourself xxx
  • exdvrexdvr Member Posts: 313 Pioneering
    @Woodbine    So very sad to read your post, words are never enough. 60+ years together is a remarkable achievement.  Do you have any siblings for support?  Thinking of you.

    Best wishes.

    DLTBGYD

  • chiariedschiarieds Member Posts: 7,918 Disability Gamechanger
    It's so lovely to read about your wonderful parents. Are you able to talk to your Dad? When my Dad was close to the end of his life he was no longer responding to me, & it was awful. One evening I was told he was worse, & I should see him. He spoke again to me; I sadly said it was OK to go & be with my Mum, & others we had lost. I felt like he needed to have my permission to leave me & he even smiled. He died that night.
    If you can talk to your Dad, treasure such moments.
  • exdvrexdvr Member Posts: 313 Pioneering
    chiarieds said:
    It's so lovely to read about your wonderful parents. Are you able to talk to your Dad? When my Dad was close to the end of his life he was no longer responding to me, & it was awful. One evening I was told he was worse, & I should see him. He spoke again to me; I sadly said it was OK to go & be with my Mum, & others we had lost. I felt like he needed to have my permission to leave me & he even smiled. He died that night.
    If you can talk to your Dad, treasure such moments.

    That was so like when my sister passed on at the age of only 50.  My nephew said "Mum, it's time to stop fighting now".   She smiled and died.

    Best wishes.

    DLTBGYD

  • poppy123456poppy123456 Member Posts: 22,218 Disability Gamechanger
    @woodbine i'm so sorry to hear this! My thoughts are with you and your family. Best wishes!
    Community champion and proud winner of the 2019 empowering others award. This award was given for supporting disabled people and their families for the benefit advice i have given to members here on the community.
  • thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @woodbine   My friend very sorry to hear this.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    Please get in touch if wish to have a chat or need some one to listen, your a valued member of our community and respected by every one.

    Thinking of you.

    Please take care.

    Your friend

    @thespiceman



    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
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  • woodbinewoodbine Member Posts: 3,719 Disability Gamechanger
    Thank you all for your kind and supportive words they mean so much, I have a feeling its going to be a desperate few days but I do have a brother and my wonderful wife and our two adult kids, but its often easier to pour your heart out to people you don't know well.
    Thanks x
    my advice is given freely and is correct to the best of my knowledge.
  • Adrian_ScopeAdrian_Scope Testing team Posts: 7,924

    Scope community team

    I'm really sorry to hear this @woodbine
    Senior Community Partner
    Scope

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  • CockneyRebelCockneyRebel Member Posts: 5,257 Disability Gamechanger

    It is always a difficult time for those of us left behind. Try to celebrate your fathers wonderful life None of us know what comes next so try to look at it as though he is about to start a new adventure.
    Our thoughts and prayers are with you all

    CR

    Be all you can be, make  every day count. Namaste
  • Chloe_ScopeChloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,652 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @woodbine, really sorry to hear this. Thinking of you.
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  • pollyanna1052pollyanna1052 Member Posts: 1,998 Disability Gamechanger
    woodbine said:ye, your dad hasn't gone yet. Enjoy I'm now and save the eulogy for after.
    Have just been told that my dad who is 86 is now to receive "end of life care", we lost mum 3 years ago and I know he will be pleased to join her, odd really as he's an atheist, so it looks like at the age of 60 I'm about to become an orphan. Its such a shame that we are losing his generation, worked from 15 til he retired did his national service, was a loving caring compassionate father and was besotted with mum for over 60 years of happily married life.
    I will miss him.
    Ay, your dear dad is still here, so enjoy him as much as you can. Is he aware of your presence?
    I became an orphan at 48....still hurts after 18 years.
    Treasure his last little bit of time.
  • Tammyjane33Tammyjane33 Member Posts: 670 Pioneering
    @woodbine I am so sorry to hear the sad news about your dad. I know how that feels I lost my dad 8 years ago. 
    I'm here if you need to talk /need a friend
    Take care ❤️
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