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Hello, my name is Matthew and i am here to try and help and get help if i can.

Lonleyhorse Community member Posts: 5 Listener
Hi everyone my name is matthew and i have been through many bad things, addictions and now trying to adapt to this roller coaster life,
I feel like everyday is a new marathon, i have got many issues, fitness freak, ptsd, adhd, ocd, anxiety, panic attacks, major depression and to tops it all of need emergency dentist help but i dont know where to turn or who to turn to,
i have agoraphobia and im 38 and shy feeling like a kid, so in public i tries to hide behind things and people because i starts laughing and smileing and noone wants to see these teeth,, i was addicted to bad things so i have bad teeth,, now 1 year free and im not smoking cigarettes anymore for 1 year now, i dont know how or where or when im going to be able to get throught this, im scrared as i gets attacked, tired of trying, lonley and very depressed because of everyone needs teeth, but mostly everyone needs someone, Im just trying to stay strong, and try and stay possitive, love to all


  • Jo_2022
    Jo_2022 Community Volunteer Host Posts: 298 Pioneering
    Hi @Lonelyhourse! 😊 Welcome to the community. I really love your user name!

    It is very brave of you to admit you had an addiction. You might like to have a look at this link:


    I would suggest you ask your GP Doctor for support for all your health issues.

    Best wishes and love to you too.


    Community Volunteer Host with a passion for human rights.

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.

  • purplepetal
    purplepetal Community member Posts: 15 Connected
    Hiya, I am in a very similar situation myself so can appreciate how hard it js for you and how much it took to write this xx 
  • Alex_Alumni
    Alex_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,562 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi there @Lonleyhorse and welcome, well done for reaching out last night.

    I hope this community can be a welcoming and supportive place for you, as our members are showing :)
    Thanks for explaining what's been happening lately, it's really helpful and takes a lot of courage.

    Can I ask what support you're getting at the moment for your conditions from your GP?

    Did you know you can get help with dental costs if you are receiving:
    • Income Support
    • Income-related Employment and Support Allowance
    • Income-based Jobseeker's Allowance
    • Pension Credit Guarantee Credit
    • Universal Credit and meet the criteria
    The NHS website explains how to get help with costs, so please have a read if it's helpful. 

    Many congratulations for being 1 year free from smoking, that's a massive achievement :) We're here to support you, so please ask if you feel we can do anything further to help, or if you have any questions.

    Online Community Coordinator

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  • Biblioklept
    Biblioklept Community member Posts: 4,707 Disability Gamechanger
    1 year free is amazing!!! Well done you should be super proud of yourself 
  • Lonleyhorse
    Lonleyhorse Community member Posts: 5 Listener
    Hi everyone and thank you for your messages,
    this complicated for me and a very long story,
    i am eccentric and have autsim to i have so much going on that sometimes i dont even have the cognative attention to let others knowof  the syptoms of what is happening to me and in my mind like dimensia,, i am a stable guy and my bark is worse than my bite and i have thousand of photos of all these things that i have accomplished and tho i am proud of myself im singled out and lonley, i am also having to deal with cleanig up after family members who i also look after ,,,, (try to as i would not be seen in that light by them being my mum adn brothers) who have done no tidying and cant even keep a kitchen clean, but would explode at me if they knew i was telling this reality,, lol its what weed and alch and tabac does makes us feel silly poisons your body etc,, anyways i am on esa bacause i had a accident where i broke my back in 2012 long stopry but i managed to self rehabilitate, i was paralised, then when i got out of hospital a few weeks later i had friends who were into drugs and pain killers are drugs they introduced me to opiodes wich i then stuggled with H weed and the white one till last year, now i cant and wont want to take anything not even medication ,, what i wish for is good helpful humans to be around, as yes the ones im around even family are attacking me because i am free, some are addicted to tele lol,, i have no children i have had no life i am 38 just turned,, and dont feel confortable where i was born at home, where i live because i am in a situation wher i can be made home less,, now i have my own youtube channel wich is kind of playin gaming etc i makes music tracks and i have built my own shed out the back and was building a pool until i have been spooked by peopl who never helped me when i realy was in need started leaning over the back garden wall asking what am i building ,, and because i said i was to plant crops and make a new shed rat poisin was thrown over and now im insecure of doing anything,, is anything worth it,,, now i have fixed myself but i am majorly insecure and because of me teeth i just dont want to go out in the garden or atall i can make things out of wood metal i have made a gem cutting machine as i have collected many crystals and qaurts and flourite of the past year and it has helped me thanks to one good mate who took me to places to find even along the beach,, i love going out and peopel who would take me out, and im scared to go to my doctors on my own because when i do i feel like i dont get listend to ,, it took me to take my family and ex girlsfreidnd to the doctor to show the break along my spine for me to get my benefit, i am still in agony most of the time but im still trying and now my head going,, i could go on,,, love to you all xxxxxx if anyone can i dont know how to inbox but feel free xx and hugs xx
  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,503 Disability Gamechanger
    I've just sent you an email from community@scope.org.uk @Lonleyhorse :)
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

    Sign our petition calling on politicians to stop demonising us
  • Lonleyhorse
    Lonleyhorse Community member Posts: 5 Listener
    Hi Tori i sent an email back to that email addy thanks for checking in, i must get some sleep now lol love to all xxx 
  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,983 Disability Gamechanger
    I can see why you needed some sleep @Lonleyhorse. Not least because it was 1:08 am when you posted!

    I hope you had a good night's sleep in the end. If you need anything, we are all here for you  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
  • Lonleyhorse
    Lonleyhorse Community member Posts: 5 Listener
    thank you and yes i did lol,,, things all seem to be looking up like magic :) hope everyone is having a good day :)
  • Sue_Alumni
    Sue_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 486 Pioneering
    Good to hear from you @Lonelyhorse and I'm glad that things are looking a bit brighter for you today. Take care and keep in touch  :)
    Online Community Adviser

    Concerned about another member's safety or wellbeing? Flag your concerns with us.
  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 52,417 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @lonelyhorse well done for going 12 months thats quite a achievement, is there a nhs dentist near you that you could register with? Might be worth a try. 
  • Lonleyhorse
    Lonleyhorse Community member Posts: 5 Listener
    thanks i have tried a few times but they wont take me as its that bad for me i needs hospital and when i have to phone i gets panicky i have tried but im not good on phones and making appointments that still a struggle, and because i dont want to be seen in public because of em it just turns into a downward spiral, im naturaly shy as is,,, 
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