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Do you like your own company or like to be around other people

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Biblioklept
Biblioklept Community member Posts: 4,957 Disability Gamechanger
I do get lonely sometimes but mostly I like my own company and just plod about doing my own thing. I know everyone is different but I've seen some people say they can't ever stand being alone. Even as a teenager I would prefer just having 1 or 2 close friends and hanging out with them rather than groups but needed a lot of time to myself too. 
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Comments

  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community member Posts: 14,984 Disability Gamechanger
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    I don’t mind the company of close family and family friends etc. but I need lots of time alone as well

    I’m definitely not a people person that mixes with all sorts of strangers although I would like to have the confidence to!
  • Biblioklept
    Biblioklept Community member Posts: 4,957 Disability Gamechanger
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    We sound very similar! I'd like the confidence to but I also know I'd still like lots of time just alone and to myself. 
    Have you always had limited self confidence? 
    I can't remember a time when I didn't second guess myself. 
  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community member Posts: 14,984 Disability Gamechanger
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    I did go through a period at school where I was always badly behaved, shouting out and messing around etc, maybe from year 3 to year 8. However apart from that I have always been very shy yes!

    I know what you mean about second guessing. I always wonder if I said or did something wrong or something.

    I think at the end of the day no one notices us as much as we think they do, and even if we do do something wrong or awkward most people probably just forget about it. I realise that’s far easier to say than to put into practise though! I find it hard!!
  • janer1967
    janer1967 Community member Posts: 21,964 Disability Gamechanger
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    I used to be around people all the time at work and hoje and sometimes wanted time to myself 

    Now I get too much time on my own but do like my own space.  I get a balance now with bf working away most of week but get weekends together 

    I know I have toby living with me but like most teenagers he shuts himself in his room or goes out with his mates 
  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community member Posts: 14,984 Disability Gamechanger
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    Does anyone else feel they get tired when mixing with other people?

    I find I get tired after about 60 mins of sitting in a group with relatives or people I know and need some time out.

    Not sure if that’s normal or to do with social anxiety.
  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 55,681 Disability Gamechanger
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    I love my me time,  I have been invited to a jubilee/ bday party, that I declined, mainly because its family out side the family. Sometimes the thought of getting ready puts me off.  Or if its a distance away. 
  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,550 Disability Gamechanger
    edited June 2022
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    Probably social anxiety @66Mustang, having to perform and conform to what we imagine are other people’s expectations for an extended period of time is very tiring. Ambiguity is tiring too.

    I used to be like that but over forty odd years ive mellowed and these days I don’t get tired in that way. 

    “This is my simple religion. No need for temples. No need for complicated philosophy. Your own mind, your own heart is the temple. Your philosophy is simple kindness.” 
    ― Dalai Lama XIV

  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community member Posts: 14,984 Disability Gamechanger
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    @leeCal thanks, makes sense, also good to know it stopped for you after some time - hopefully with time/experience the same will happen with me
  • Cartini
    Cartini Community member Posts: 1,108 Pioneering
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    I enjoy my own company, which is just as well because I live alone (and have done for 20 years).  My best friend / besty (or whatever expression is used nowadays) is female who stays at mine on a Saturday.  I pick her up on the Saturday morning and take her home on the Sunday morning.  I do the driving because she has recently been diagnosed with Parkinson`s, so can no longer drive.
    She gets 24 hours away from her 20 something children and I get 24 hours company with someone who is very close to me (read that as I spoil her rotten for the time she is at mine).
    It`s a win-win situation for both and I also get my "on my own again for a week" batteries recharged.
  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 55,681 Disability Gamechanger
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    @Cartini sounds a nice arrangement for you both.
  • woodbine
    woodbine Community member Posts: 12,109 Disability Gamechanger
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    I like to be around people, but must admit that when I became ill I lost a lot of confidence it's slowly come back to a degree but I'm not the same person I was.

    2024 Election won

  • Biblioklept
    Biblioklept Community member Posts: 4,957 Disability Gamechanger
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    Does the lack of confidence affect how much you want to be around people @woodbine?
  • Cartini
    Cartini Community member Posts: 1,108 Pioneering
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    Sandy_123 said:
    @Cartini sounds a nice arrangement for you both.

    Thank you:)
  • Cartini
    Cartini Community member Posts: 1,108 Pioneering
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    Hi @Cartini How lovely, ideal for you both.

    Thank you :) 
  • Grinchy
    Grinchy Community member Posts: 1,932 Disability Gamechanger
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    I never used to mind being in groups of people, i used to be a mobile dj and had to be up front for a few hours, nowadays its just me and my wife, i spend the time on the computer, she watches tv and we watch tv together, i don't mind it being just us, i get anxious in large groups of people, just my complex ptsd playing up
  • life
    life Community member Posts: 527 Pioneering
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    I'd like to be around people more but just feel so comfortable being alone. When I'm around anyone from family to friends it just feels like my body drains energy after a short while. Sad really because I'd like to spend more time with people.
  • allisonnixon27
    allisonnixon27 Community member Posts: 8 Listener
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    I was always a people person but I can’t bare to be around people now.my partner of over 20 year works away and when he’s home I even watch telly in my bedroom after he gets up.i find it very difficult to be around people as I hate being around myself.my oldest daughter is the only person I really talk to,I hate being the way I am but it’s easier 
  • SueHeath
    SueHeath Community member Posts: 12,420 Disability Gamechanger
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    Just a thought that has popped into my head - do you think the last two years has caused a lot of this or has it always been with you x
  • allisonnixon27
    allisonnixon27 Community member Posts: 8 Listener
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    I never had time to be alone and I believe it’s always been there but then I stopped working and spiralled.i need help and part of me wants help but I’m ashamed and I don’t want to talk about it because I can’t,I literally fall apart when I try and even writing this is upsetting me.i know it’s absurd I tell myself I’m being ridiculous but I can’t help it x
  • SueHeath
    SueHeath Community member Posts: 12,420 Disability Gamechanger
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    Bless you @allisonnixon27 you havn't got to share anything with us darling that your not happy to.
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