How to handle my son school

Hello @tashaf85 and welcome to the community.

I can understand your frustrations as my daughter was not diagnosed until she was 12.

A couple of points. First it is the local authority who should be doing the EHCP, not the school.

Second Despite plenty of notice just about every education authority is behind on providing these for those with statements and will miss the April deadline this year. Thats not including new cases.

https://www.ipsea.org.uk/what-you-need-to-know/ehc-plans will give you plenty of information about EHCP

IPSEA has a huge amount of information regarding special education needs as well as having an advice line. It is the one site I recommend to any parent with a child with a disability who are having problems with school.

You have clearly spoken to the school, have you followed their complaint procedure yet?

If not, ask the office for a copy of the complaint procedure and file a formal complaint with them. Normally you would need to follow this procedure before raising the complaint through the school before complaining to the local authority, however I would be tempted to put in a complaint with them at the same time considering the timescale before he moves to secondary education. I would also seriously consider talking to one of your local councillors and raise it as an issue you need help with.

The local authority may not deal with your complaint before the school complaint procedure has been followed, but if not they will most likely to approach the school to ask for information or to push them to resolve the situation. If you have a good councillor they will have a number of routes to take to help you resolve this. Including approaching the school. I am confident once external interest is shown the school will get the necessary forms sent in quickly.

That is the good news. If you are extremely lucky the LA will do the EHCP in the 20 weeks timescale they are supposed to and you will get what you want.

Realistically most authorities are behind in applications with many students waiting more than a year to either get one or told they have been rejected. At which point you are looking at a long struggle to get the help and support your son needs. I am not trying to put you off, or upset you but to let you know what many families in your situation are facing on a daily basis.

I have  used IPSEA as a parent and school governor and signpost them to parents SEN students who are struggling with their schools. Please take the time to explore the site, it is full of useful resources. https://www.ipsea.org.uk/home

The better informed you are the better the chances are your son will get the support he needs. We are here to support you and somewhere you can let of steam. But for your son's sake and your own sanity you need to get informed on your rights and what your options are.

Hi @tashaf85

Most of the schools my daughter had been in were in special measures. One had lost its right to manage its own money. I agreed to join the governors on the understanding that I had responsibilities towards SEN provision. Worked three months with the SENCO to meet what was expected towards SEN students. 
Got the board to agree and sat in when the SENCO explained some of the new procedures, which would have brought us to the minimum requirement but the teachers protested so the head teacher procrastinated. The next day I wrote my resignation and forwarded it to the Clerk and Chair. I really hated doing it but nothing was going to change. The head was removed shortly afterwards and a new head appointed and they are doing well now.

I have been threatened with court action if I didn't retract a formal complaint I made at another school, but did not back down. Secondary school was pretty good until it became an academy. One of the first issues was the  home / school / student agreement. It changed the rules so that they could put a child in detention for up to two hours without informing parents. I refused to sign until they agreed to change it that the school would inform us if this happened. Then when her GCSEs were coming up the English department decided to use this clause to make the children do two hours extra for five days to improve their chances. They were told an hour before they were due to go home. My daughter called me distraught so I told her to go to the class but I would sort it out. Called the headmaster and asked when the agreement had been changed. Five minutes into the extra classes my daughter was told to go home and the teacher asked to step outside the classroom so the headmaster could have a quiet word. She was the only one to get out of it because I refused to just sign the agreement.

That said she went onto university and got a first.

On top of all that, once we got the diagnosis we applied for a statement but was turned down because 'the school had not allowed her to fail'!

So I do understand your frustration and anger, but trust me if you allow it long term it will drag you down. I found by getting myself informed meant I knew what I wanted to happen and how to get results.  Most of the time though I had a good relationship with the right people.

@tashaf85 sorry I have just deleted a longer post offering you some advice but then reread your post. I can pick up on the points I was going to make later on if necessary.

'You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink'

You can work hard and run yourself into the ground trying to get what is best for your son, or you can work smarter.

There is a UK charity which has been working specifically in SEN provisions in our schools and have helped thousands of parents to take on schools and sort things out including winning tribunals over the years.

Their staff are highly trained in this area of law, and many are parents of children with special education needs.

This charity provides training to local authority SEN teams, schools, school governors and others equipping them with the legal knowledge they need to effectively do their jobs.

Their website provides a huge range of resources, they have a general helpline and a tribunal helpline. 

With the exception of the training their services are free.

The name of  this charity is Independent Parental Special Education Advice or IPSEA.

To be clear my only association as with this charity is having used their services. 

This realy is the oasis in the desert.

If you think things are tough with his primary school there is good chance this will be a picnic compared to mainstream secondary schools. Even getting into a special needs school some parents have continued to have issues.

I know I have mentioned this charity to you twice already, but seriously just look  at the site and if you don't think it is for you fair enough. After referring many parents and school governors to this site you would be the first if you came back and said you did not find it helpful.

Here is a good starting point:
https://www.ipsea.org.uk/contact/advice-and-support

Either way I am happy to try and help and support you.

Hi I completely agree with ParentingAdvisorVikki you as a parent have every right to request an assessment. Don't let school dragging their feet impact on your needs. Unfortunately we parents have to be very, very proactive and battle for what our children need! Here in Leeds we have a very helpful parent support for these situations called Sendias. Where they support parents when they are having schooling issues. I don't know if you have anything similar where you are that could fight your corner?
Good luck with it, stay strong and don't be fobbed off.