On the verge of suiciside - Page 2 — Scope | Disability forum
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On the verge of suiciside

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  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Paddie Good to hear from you. How are you ?

    How can I be a friend , need to ask. Please talk to me. I am here to understand, be supportive and a friend.

    Please I hope we can chat soon. Sometimes just by talking does help.

    We can find answers to your problems. A problem shared is a problem halved.

    I know the community cares, I care.

    Any problems contacting any one put as @before the user name.

    Also have a look at the community guide  that helps eases your mind..

    Please when your ready am here to listen.

    Your friend

    @thespiceman
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
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  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @thespiceman
    Thank you for your support.
    when I was in hospital there were a few other pt's I got to know well.
    we would chat a lot & became a little " community" talked about everything & nothing.
    i realised then just how much their friendship helps.
    Talking is so important as, is friendship!
    Back home reaffirmed my loneliness.
    I need ( as we all do) a friend (s)!
    I was a Nurse in a previous life.
    I worked on an extremely busy inner city Male Trauma & Orthopeadic Unit ( think I've spelt that wrong) and I loved every single minute of it.... going from being so busy & having to communicate to so many.... to now...nothing, is just awful & yes, I'm sure I am depressed.
    But no amount of medication can replace my "want" to work & have friends again!
    I know, due to my physical illness, I could never work again or even commit to Voluntary work & the reality of that is cruel.
    I also realised, you don't have to be alone to feel lonely.
    I applied to Age Concern, to become a "Befriender" but actually it's ME that needs a friend!!
    I sometimes "self medicate" ( I'm not referring to Alcohol) so I can just knock myself out to sleep through the long lonely days.
    I fear there is no hope for me & it's a terrible way to feel.
    Hope your "coping" ok?
    its good to be in touch again.
    fond regards 
    Paddie
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Paddie Thank you for sharing and pleased to talk to you again. The main thing is I wish to say is you need reassurance.

    I understand the disability, illness and problems. I thank you for sharing with me.

    I believe you have many skills, talents, qualities that can and would be useful. It is finding what is right for you.

    I think what is important right now is to find what you need to support yourself. What is needed for you to maintain your wellbeing.

    Sometimes we need to sit down have these thoughts in our head. They go around in our minds.  Effecting everything.

    Start to have negative thoughts and think right now cannot move forward.  Look back to when I was working, the opportunities and everything else

    What helps me is finding answers and solutions.  Finding doing small steps, simple pleasures and finding what you like to do. Make something enjoyable.

    Does not have to be complicated or hard or difficult

    Got radio on now afternoon. TV off listening to radio pleasurable. Classic FM.

    One of the tools I use is to write down everything you would like to do. Goals, aims and anything you like. You might not do these all. Yet what could you do. Start off small.  

    Have a diary put in it one thing each day you would like to achieve that day. Might not do it that day but another day. Start off small.

    On a morning start the day with radio no news or tiresome stories.  Have uplifting music.

    Coping methods is educating your self to try new things.

    In your mind. You say can not do work or volunteering. Well volunteering very much is a vast subject, themes. Many organisations.  I come on here volunteer here.

    Helping the community. Just couple hours or more a week.

    Understand about work , have a two page CV and more. I am sure many of the community members have the same.  Maybe more.

    I have qualifications experience, proud of. So should you all that you have done. Amazing.

    Maybe change direction, look at something else

    So used need my talents, skills adapted them looked at other ways to most importantly find ways to improve my mental wellbeing.

    That is the role of the support workers to give you some impetus to move forward.

    I hope I have given you some inspiration.

    Apologise long post just a friend saying you can move forward.

    I can be supportive. You can do this.  You are not alone ever.

    Please ask if you need anything I can help with. Organisations or additional support.

    Take care

    your friend

    @thespiceman


    .





     
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
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    Recipes
  • steve51
    steve51 Community member Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Paddie

    Good Afternoon how are you doing today????

    Yes I worked in a nhs rehab centre for over 10yrs after my “Stroke”

    I loved every minute/day!!!!

    I was loved by all of the staff & patients.

    Following my last admission to hospital I desperately tried to go back but it was too much.

    I even tried volunteering but even that was two much.

    Please please let me know if I can help/support you further??????


  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @spicemam
    Thank you for all your advice. 
    However., I just feel numb & this time of year is particularly difficult for me ( & many others too) My M's anniversary of passing has just gone & my precious sister, Margaret's anniversary of passing is coming up.. Christmas Eve.
    I can't accept they have gone & find myself wanting to join them...
    sorry... Paddie
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    Sorry should have read My Mum's"
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @steve51
    Thank you also for your support but Im tired Steve.
    ive tried everything I can to possibly help myself.
    The Samaritans maybe a blessing for many but not me. 
    I've had horrific experiences with them years ago..... never again.
    Everything just seems so very Black... 
    sorry
    Paddie
  • steve51
    steve51 Community member Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Paddie

    Are you ok with replying to other’s posts?????

    We can all become your “new family” 

    I am here all of the time so you can always contact me if required???

    Please please let me know how you feel???
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @steve51
    not sure what you mean re replying to other posts?!?!
    is there another way of contacting people?
    I am unsure re using this site, navigation wise..... 
    Paddie
  • steve51
    steve51 Community member Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Paddie

    I’m so sorry to hear that you have had such a bad time with everyone else to date!!!!

    I promise I won’t be like that at all.

    How can I prove this??????

    I have never walked away from anything in my life.

    I certainly don’t want to do that with you !!!!!!!!!!
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @steve51 was only the Samaritans & that was many, many years ago.
    Paddie
  • steve51
    steve51 Community member Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Paddie

    “Thanks”

    Can I please try to help/support you???

    I promise you won’t “Be Let Down”
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Paddie glad to hear from you. Sorry to hear about everything with your family.

    Talking about loved ones passing never easy ever to deal with and difficult to get through the day.. I can imagine the pain is unbearable, the grief. How if you instead of The Samaritans contact CRUSE.

    This might help. It is a bereavement organisation for those losing loved ones.  Some one to talk to.

    https://wwwcruse.org.uk.

    helpline 0808 808 1677 Monday to Friday 9.30am to 5pm.

    Do you think that might help.

    Please I am here if you need to chat.  

    @thespiceman
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • Ami2301
    Ami2301 Community member Posts: 7,942 Disability Gamechanger
    On the right hand side of the page, there will be your profile picture, underneath that are 4 icons, if you click on the 2nd icon it will open up your inbox and enable you to privately message other users. Hope this helps
    Disability Gamechanger - 2019
  • Pippa_Alumni
    Pippa_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,793 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Paddie, how are you today?

    I'm so sorry to hear that things are tough right now, but I'm so glad to see you have the support of our wonderful community members. We're all here and we're listening, so do keep us updated and let us know how you're doing. 

    You may also find our community guide useful in helping you get to grips with the community. I hope today is as kind as possible to you!
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @Piippa
    THank you for your support. It means so much.
    Got a Hospital appointment this pm which I'm dreading but at least it'll get me out of the house which is good for me!
    im trying so hard to hold on but it's ( as for so many) extremely difficult..... but I'm still here, so that's a positive!
    I would love if the "Scope"community was local & we could all get together for a cuppa & chat......
    Paddie
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Paddie   How are you today?  Hope today will be better. See you have hospital appointment.

    Wish every success with that. One thing I wish to say. Sound more positive. One thing have look on line see what support groups in your area.

    I never wished to ask a lady her age but AGE UK is something to consider.  Have details what do you think.?

    AGE UK Helpline 0800 055 6112.

    https://wwwageuk.org.uk.

    Have very informative website I think the minimum age is Sixty for any services. I applied for information and some support but got told need to be Sixty my area but some areas now accepting community members mid fifties.

    Also the Silver line https://wwwsilverline.org.uk.

    0800  4 70 80 90 set up by Esther Ranzen for those of a certain age I think it Seventy minimum age please could you find out. Might be useful. I asked for myself. Got told too young am early fifties.

    Get a weekly phone call from a befriender. Who you can chat to. Those who are lonely.  Just a idea.

    Find out if you can anything your local SCOPE office might advise.  Could be a local support group near to you.

    Have a look on line and put in SCOPE then your nearest town.

    Understand it is what you wish to do.  I am just being a friend and supportive.

    Wish you well.

    Take care.

    @thespiceman


    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • steve51
    steve51 Community member Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Paddie

    Have you been to the hospital as yet/how did things go????

    Please please let me help you with things (Support & Advice) 

    I promise not to let you Down!!!!!!!!

    Yes that would be lovely to get together if possible ?????

    Where do you live????

    I would love to arrange things if needed?????

    I used to be a manager in my “Old Life”

    Well they would not like (Mark 2)

    I would definitely {Kick some ****}

    Please please let me know if we can meet at some point?????????
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @thespiceman
    Thank you for all your advice.... yeah, Im in my early fifties too.. 
    Hospital appointment bit "iffy" got to go back Wednesday for more tests... really worried as its my Eyes that are the issue!
    Managed to "pop" into church today & light quite a few Candles.... such a lovely,  peaceful feeling...
    Its a long way from where I live but I've always found it special...
    Hope things are going ok with you?
    fond regards 
    Paddie
  • Paddie
    Paddie Community member Posts: 75 Courageous
    @steve51
    THanks for  your message.... where about some do you live?
    Hospital Appointment was a bit scary.... got to go back again I need Wednesday for further Eye Tests....
    ..absolutely terrified to be honest.....
    Paddie

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