Health worries.

Jean Eveleigh
Jean Eveleigh Scope Member Posts: 186 Empowering
in Talk about your impairment
On Saturday (11th) I had another Amurosis fugax mini stroke (the last one was in 2012).  I'm OK, tired but OK, worried but OK; OK I'm trying to convince myself I'm OK so as not to worry anyone in my family and friendship circle.

I know the mechanics of what happened, what no one can tell me is why now and if/when it will happen again. This is what worries me.

It's almost 11years to the day since the last one.  I'm in my 40's now, when the next one hits will I be as lucky again or will it be a bigger clot, causing more damage, causing a bigger more damaging stroke.

I already have to use a wheelchair, walking frame or crutches to mobilise and fight hard to retain the mobility and independence I have and am afraid of loosing them.

I am finding myself very down and morose, struggling to find any motivation.

Comments

  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 63,129 Championing
    Hi @Jean Eveleigh  I'm so sorry to read that you had a stroke.  Are you under the stroke teams  they are usually really good,  they offer support with Physio and OT. If you can definaltly get in touch with gp to review medications to prevent. 
    I understand that you are feeling frightened.
  • Hannah_Alumni
    Hannah_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,866 Championing
    Hello @Jean Eveleigh

    I'm so sorry you had another stroke and that you are feeling so down. Have you got good support around you? We are always here in the community if you want to chat or to vent or even if you want a distraction and play game in our Coffee Lounge. There is a brilliant organisation called SHOUT who are a 24/7 mental health texting service in case you feel you'd like to talk about things more privately. 
  • Jean Eveleigh
    Jean Eveleigh Scope Member Posts: 186 Empowering
    Hi thanks for the replies.

    I have 2 carers one live in and one live out for my existing disability needs. 

    I am waiting for a letter from my ophthalmologist to give to my GP going through the examinations I have had done and also one to take to the Moorfields A+E department at my local hospital if I have a repeat event.

    I am not currently under a stroke clinic as it is so long since my last event.

    I am incapable of doing so much for myself as it is or I can only do it if there is someone else in the home to supervise and assist - I often say I am living like a toddler there is so much my brain and I want to do but for safety I cannot so yes the bits I can do are very important to me and they are the only bits of independence I have so I hold onto them fiercely and loosing them will be devastating to me I know other disabled people are able to still find life fulfilling if completely bed or wheel-bound (I don't care if you disagree with this description for me it is what I would be if I lose the ability to walk I currently have) due to either lose of mobility or blindness.

    I am sick of mourning the loss of the person I was or thought I would be as my health continues to deteriorate and degenerate as I get older.
  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 63,129 Championing
    I totally understand @Jean Eveleigh must be hard trying to cling onto the independance you do have 

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