Overwhelmed daily alone

Thankyou Catherine, it's a had a big impact on family, the elderlies because of what it makes them do.. All the best hoping you ok.. Dark nights are **** i go to bed early then the waking up & it all comes back

it's just dreams when asleep i wish i could select them but Syd was in mine last night & then yer wake up.. Lately i've just wanted to take a pill & carry on sleeping as that is what i used to do but as i got older the best thing is force yerself to get up and try to get back in a routine even though it is so hard & painful. I say this now but tomorrow i probably won't feel it. Mornings are terrible as i see memories of Syd everywhere.

@Catherine21 yes we think of how things will be way before they happen especially if anxious , the worst bit is things happening in the house that happen like hearing him run upstairs when he comes in after being out. i hear stuff daily.. Yes the dark nights take time to get used to but sometimes i feel like hibernating, having a bath & going to bed early.

@luvpink thankyou it's surreal & rubbish.

Hi i've had a bad few days being quite lonesome, all routine has stopped, its same with my mum she has no get up & go positivity, very negative attitude always comparing herself to people in worse conditions.. even though pained, i just see after Syd died them following like the wheels falling off, its just not the same.. I kept his fave toy, why do we do that to upset ourselves.. Yes our families sometimes i think they pull you down from how you are when close to them as we become them & not ourselves. Life when smooth is ok just when bad stuff happens can't cope.. My dr gave me some diazepam but don't take at night just codeine pills. Hope your ok tonight

Hi yes it is horrible, i'm far more devastated about Syd than any other human family members that have died over the years, he was my best mate i'm heartbroken. I help out with elderly parents who loved him too & they took him out regularly for their own physical & mental health but all that has gone now.. Bit overwhelming at the moment is life & can't see it getting better.. Thanks

Thanks, taking a bit of time to get used to change of routine & house also mi mum n dad taken turn for the worse physically & mentally after Syd went, i feared that would happen. Sedating myself, bit overwhelmed.. Hope you ok

Thanks Catherine, yes it's pretty crappy now they sat on own in house with no distraction, Syd would be in & out the living room, in the garden etc or out for a quick walk before bed.. It's hard to get used to it all. Yes when no siblings it's hard as all responsibility on ourselves but it's not always bad as i don't get on with rest of family so in ways can be better off on own.. I like to go to bed but dreams are terrible & i hate mornings, they can be terrible if anxious & depressive moods.