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Is there a reason why I can't find a new relationship whether through real dating or online dating?

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Splatmate24
Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Courageous
Although I don't want a man too busy, I also don't want someone too lazy. I'm a 24 year old woman with a learning disability. yep if you are dating in person it is more difficult to find a single man but also online dating has be more difficult to find balanced with being in middle of two . I have tried to date in real life but haven't met any single men, but I have met a lot of taken men. Yes, I even asked friends if they knew any single men and they said no. I tried online dating. There is some reason why I seem to be at the dead end of being single even i don't even want to be single but is by chose . I can't find anyone that is not a bit busy and not too lazy. I'm only allowed to date men with a learning disability since my mother has very strict rules regarding dating, online dating and relationship. What am I doing wrong that im not getting past a part that i really wanted to have a boyfrien but i don't want a cheater,toxic,abuser,verbal abuser ,Cocky and being too immature . I would like that a man in my life is respectful, decent trustworthy, faithful, open-minded, and has common interests. II would prefer a short man over tall men. what can i do that i move pass and finding get into a new relationship ?  

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  • anisty
    anisty Community member Posts: 354 Pioneering
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    I'm heartened to hear your Mum is helping to keep you safe!

    What about taking the focus off trying to find a man for a while and see if there are any groups, activities or hobbies you can do.

    Sometimes the best way of meeting someone right for you is through a shared interest. Think about things you might like to do where men are likely to be (cake decorating might not be the ideal place to meet a man!)


    Don't go along with the main intention of getting a man. Be yourself, enjoy the activity. In that way people will get to see the best of your whole personality and you're more likely to find a keeper!

    Good luck!


  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Courageous
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    @anisty. i'm  not stuck to any activities that are very social or groups . there seem to be nothing there with one that i have try before that were for learning disability .  only hobbies that i enjoy most is gaming but that not going get me a guy part from if i met off with person on splatoon 3 but i don't think that is going to happen part from . i don't like team base physical games in real life . 
  • Leo_Aces
    Leo_Aces Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 104 Courageous
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    Hello @Splatmate24, I definitely echo @anisty. Perhaps you can focus on groups and activities online and in person which you really enjoy and mean that you meet many kinds of new people. I really understand that finding new activities and groups can be tough. You say that you enjoy gaming, are you part of any online gaming communities?

    ♠️Community Volunteer Advisor ♠️

    I’m a Speaker and Life Coach.

    I have professional knowledge of Gender Identity & Sexuality  

    I coach people with all abilities to guide them to realise their potential and feel empowered 

    My background is Person Centred and Transactional therapy 

    ➡️Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.⬅️

  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Courageous
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    @Leo_Aces the closet one is Reddit that i'm on and i did try discord but mainly be rude people when i did go on for splatoon series . not many people know about the game . is on Nintendo switch that been two games of it . i'm playing on splatoon 3 . has try gamer dating sites but i just looking for a free  without having to pay to message a person if a person is a VIP .gamers dating sites or apps . not gotten anyone from UK from Reddit . not sure about my town doesn't seem to be gaming events for single . my town is Warrington . is suck for learning disability . that is just sport and youth center that might also has mainstream people .

  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,981 Disability Gamechanger
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    Oh no, you deserve a lot better than rude people @Splatmate24! Though, can I ask you what you mean by "rude" - what does this look like for you?

    I just want to make sure I hear you as clearly as I can. It sounds really difficult that there are limited opportunities in your area.

    Are there any areas you may be able to travel to with more opportunities or could you, maybe, create your own opportunities - such as playing games with people once you have met up with them?

    Hopefully, there is something that will help to create more positive opportunities for you. You have mentioned playing splatoon 3 at the moment. How are you finding playing this game?  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Courageous
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    @L_Volunteer. the discord when i was on is uselessly be on splatoon area but some got angry about me trying to get better about complaining about splatoon . these types users with on pros and didn't really help .  has people spamming and being very disrespectful . same thing what happen with one of Reddit subreddit . Reddit has be more succeful with finding splatoon user but not in UK .  i also has look in uk that is near my town and did try a youth club in Norwich but didn't get anywhere near boyfriend since most of guys that i did met already has girlfriend and one guy there was my ex boyfriend that was a cheater was at the youth club in Norwich . then was a very younger underage of  alcohol , I have been to beers  Festival .  also has a mini cold that got into my of meting up with people or men that seem to be too busy ,
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