Hi everyone, I am new to all this and hoping for some advice - apologies if I am posting this in the wrong category.
I had to leave my job after a breakdown last year and I was advised to apply for ESA and PIP - it took me months to get the courage up but I finally applied a few months ago. I'm due my PIP assessment this week but I really don't think I can go through with it. A local charity helped me with the forms, as I didn't have a clue, and she emphasised the physical aspects of my health issues, such as erosive arthritis (I don't consider myself to have a disability and I was able to work despite it). However, I have been diagnosed with complex PTSD, anxiety and depression, which I consider the main blight on my health - the problem is that the PTSD was caused by workplace trauma, and my work put me through a process which is just too reminiscent of the PIP assessment, including two occupational health reports, and I would have been on a disciplinary if I hadn't decided to leave (I self-harmed in work, NB in private, but they found out), first time in my life (I'm in my 50s), following being bullied, an 'informal' investigation into my behaviour, despite my exemplary record, 6 months of severe sleep deprivation (3 hours' sleep a night) and weight loss. I literally shake at the thought of it and I still cry about it every day. I just don't think I am up to this assessment and it's put me in a very bad place. Can I cancel it now? And if I become seriously (physically) ill in the future, eg if the arthritis gets disabling, can I start a fresh claim?