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Going through a really hard time and cant find anyone who understands

emacov

I am sorry to come here and make a fuss but really not coping. My disabilities seem to be worse or maybe it's just all this stress

My Dad died. It's a couple of years ago. But in his will he made the solicitor his executor. I'm sure he didn't realise what that meant as he had Parkinsons at the time and I didn't realise but as soon as he died solicitor had me in the office wanting £20,000 for his services so it was agreed house would be sold. I was part owner of the house and i believe Dad was hoping I'd buy the rest of the house but my situation when he wrote the will in 2007 was very different to when he died. I was trying to get a sheltered housing property as I was terrified of being homeless but it didn't work out

House was not selling so solicitor took me to court in June to evict me. I approached all the charities for help but none could or would so judge ended up giving solicitor £95,000 from sale of house plus a personal bill to myself of £25,000. I think the costs were so much as solicitor took a barrister with him. It was really horrible as i felt really alone against the solicitor, barrister and judge. I had to leave the property at end of July. I had nowhere else to go so was homeless and had to rely on council to provide a bed in a homeless shelter. It was very difficult with all my disabilities and it was really stressful and very scary. I then after a month was told I had to sign a contract for flat im now residing or be on the streets as council would no longer let me stay in the hostel. I didn't want to take this place as it was causing me problems with my breathing, there is no bath and i need a bath for my disabilities and no kitchen appliances but I had no choice. I spent 2 months with no cooker or fridge until solicitor let me back into house to take my fridgefreezer and microwave. Couldn't take cooker as i had built in oven and hob. I've had to go to a hotel once a week since I moved here just to get a bath. I have been using PIP payments for hotel and as I am now 8 miles away from where i used to live which was near town centre i also have to use for taxi fares.

I feel completely lost and everything has gone wrong including utility bills which seem to be more expensive in this 1 bedroom flat than they were in my 2 bedroom house. I still have to pay mortgage on house as not sold yet and council tax now want full council tax payments on house. I have really lost all sense of everything. I don't have enough money to pay all these bills and live in a constant meltdown state. I've tried to talk to all parties about bills but they are all adamant that i have to pay what they are asking even whilst they say they understand my situation! I can't see how they can understand when I need double benefit payments just to pay all these bills. Last month I had to go 3 weeks without food as i didn't have any money to buy food and still have other bills that have to be paid. I don't know how long I can go on like this. I broke down on the phone to Anglian water today saying 8 just want to go home. I want to go back to the life I had before. I don't want this life anymore

I've run out of people to ask for help and really don't know what to do

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Comments

Littlefatfriend

Thanks for sharing emacov

It looks like you've had a bit of a 'mare!

It very much appears to me that you would benefit from professional advice. I include in that charities and other organisations which help people with your particular disability.

The CAB (and many other places) can be helpful sources of legal advice.

In order to effectively advise you, such organisations will likely need you to reveal more about the specifics of your situation than you should tell us here.

I expect your greatest need is to identify the best sources for that advice.

I suggest asking Googly to recommend such organisations to you. I'm confident they could.

Good luck

Rosie_Scope

Hi @emacov, that sounds incredibly overwhelming. I'm so sorry to hear you're dealing with all this after losing your dad. We've send an email with some resources in case they are useful to you.

One of the links I've sent is for the Disability Energy Support team - they may be able to help find a way to manage your energy and water bills.

As littlefatfriend says, perhaps Citizens Advice might be a good place to start if you haven't already spoken to them. They may be able to connect you with other local services that could help you manage the situation.

Some councils will have hardship funds to help people who are struggling. That could be worth looking into too.

Are you managing okay with food at the moment? There are some ideas on where to get low cost or free food here if that would be helpful including places that won't need a referral: https://www.scope.org.uk/advice-and-support/food-no-money-food-banks

Sorry, just to add - have you had an occupational therapy visit to assess your needs in the flat? That could be a good thing to look into to see if they can push for a more accessible flat for you.

I hope things start feeling easier for you soon.

Jane315STARX

So sorry to hear you are going through all of this stress.I also think that the GP could offer some help as they have lots of connected services which could lead you on to practical help and answers.You will not be in this situation forever 'someone' is looking out for you.Try and hold on to this thought if you can ( I know its incredibly hard.Sending love x

JennieWren

oh my word how awful and overwhelming for you to deal with. With regard to the money side there’s a charity called CAP (Christian’s against poverty) and they probably have a volunteer in your area. Although you may be outside the remit for some of their help they might be able to help in other ways. My husband and I did their money management training and it helped us better manage our money. We paid off our £10,000 debt within a couple of years, despite a pay cut. They may also know of other support in your area, such as food banks. Our neighbours volunteer at our local one and delivers to those with disabilities.

Nightcity

welcome to the forum,

I'm very sorry to read your story that's absolutely awful.

I hope you find the help and advice you need and deserve soon.

Rebs

Hi, I am so sorry you have been treated like this; it's disgraceful. I would let your doctor know what is happening; maybe they can refer you to a disability organisation or an OT for an assessment to see if your house can be adapted. As someone else has already said, go to the Citizens Advice Bureau for advice about your money. There might be benefits you should be receiving, and they may be able to help you get into or apply for suitable housing, like sheltered housing, as you mentioned.

Trevor_PIP

Absolutely shocking! That is awful. You need to get professional help, use the links provided by Rosie. I'll not look at a Solicitor in the same light again, miserable **** I'm disgusted!

Try the Salvation Army too!

Keep in touch too!

emacov

I think people think solicitors are there to help but as I have found out their focus is on the money they can make. Which isn't bad if you are rich. But if you don't have money they are rarely helpful. But he did say I needed my own solicitor to his credit. I just could never afford one unless I wanted to pay another big bill. I have found that the clients never win, just the solicitors.

Trevor_PIP

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087889#Comment_1087889

If you can give @Rosie_Scope your address I will post recorded delivery some of my PIP money to you. Or another address which is secure to keep your own address safe! I will do this for you. Or I send it to @Rosie_Scope and she forwards it on!

MCMikey

Sorry to hear your terrible predicament. Sometimes you can find local solicitors who will do work without charge, especially in hard done cases like yours. Ask citizens advice, and/or look on the internet. £20k for the solicitor to be executor sounds excessive, for what sounds like a simple low value estate. I assume low value as if it were a higher value there would be more funds (from savings and Investments) and you presumably wouldn't now be in the predicament you are in. I would have thought around £8k mark for the solicitor. I'd perhaps ask a friend to phone that same solicitor, saying they are ringing round solicitors for estimates comparing quotes and ask what would be an estimate to act as executor of a similar (pretend) estate with similar house value and savings/investments that your father had and see what they say. As your solicitor was the named executor doesn't mean that they can have you over a barrel and simply charge whatever they want. The aforemention test can prove if that was occurring.

As to the £95k figure, that just sounds plain wrong - why should the solicitor get that payment from the sale of the house.

I'm not legally trained but have acted as executor to my mother and father, so you do need proper advice. I hope you can get some redress.

emacov

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087891#Comment_1087891

Trevor, that's a very kind offer but at the moment I'm a bottomless pit. So many things financially wrong here. I wish I could say it was my fault and I'd had fun gambling! But it's all circumstances and all ifs. If dad had lived longer I could have paid mortgage off. If Dad hadn't made a will maybe I'd be in a different place. If I could have stayed in the house I wouldn't have all these problems with utilities. It's a world of ifs. The. Biggest if, if I could have won the lottery then there wouldn't be any problems. I wouldn't dream of dragging anyone else into my mess even if it wasn't of my making. But I appreciate your offer. Very kind.

Trevor_PIP

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087897#Comment_1087897

No problem, if @Rosie_Scope or yourself can sort something out, I'll do it. The organisations that are after money off you won't know about it.

Strawberry1

Sending a load of empathy and compassion your way

Sending supportive hugs your ways if thats ok

My heart goes out to you

PracticeWotUPreach

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/140330/going-through-a-really-hard-time-and-cant-find-anyone-who-understands

Hi, I’m really sorry you’re going through all of this. Anyone in your position would be overwhelmed. You’re not doing anything wrong.

It really sounds like you’ve been left to deal with all of this completely on your own against solicitors, a barrister, the council, it’s far too much for one person. I can hear how exhausted and scared you are, and I’m glad you reached out here.

Just a few things that might help:

•For the bills – Citizens Advice, StepChange or National Debtline can speak to the companies for you. They can sometimes get payments paused or reduced because of vulnerability.

•Housing – If the flat isn’t suitable (breathing issues, no bath), you can ask the council for a housing needs review or an Occupational Therapy assessment. You shouldn’t be forced into a place that makes your health worse.

• The executor/legal fees: If you feel the solicitor has acted unfairly or charged excessive fees, you can contact the Legal Ombudsman. They deal specifically with complaints about solicitors’ conduct and costs.

•Food – Please don’t go without food again. You can get a food bank referral through Citizens Advice, your GP, or the council’s emergency help scheme.
And if things feel too heavy or you’re feeling like you can’t cope, please talk to someone straight away:

Samaritans 116 123 (24/7) or text SHOUT to 85258

You’ve had far too much to deal with, and you don’t deserve to struggle through it alone. Keep talking to us — you’re not a burden, you’re just someone who’s been pushed way past their limit

Ross1975

I'm really sorry to hear you're going through this.

I really don't understand how the solicitor can just take £95,000 from you without you having any choice in the matter, absolutely terrible world we're living in.

emacov

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087915#Comment_1087915

Thank you for commenting. Solicitor was awarded that amount by the judge. To be honest, I wasn't sure what was going on. They have their own language and being in same room with judge, solicitor and solicitors barrister was overwhelming. I admit I was crying at the time as I couldn't believe the judge was awarding the solicitor so much from a house that is maybe worth £130,000. And telling me I also had to pay solicitor another £25,000 for his costs and rent on the house. That I really don't understand, why I have to pay rent on a house I part owned to the solicitor. It felt like they were making it up. And i still have to pay mortgage back. It's like a nightmare but real life. It felt like I'd done something really wrong but all I ever did was live in the house and care for my Dad as he had Parkinsons so i don't know. All I really know is Dad would never have wanted what happened to me to ever happen. I know he thought he was protecting me. So I'm still at the stage of **** happened as seems unbelievable but I was there and judgement was made. I don't know how or why and as it was a judge I don't think I can argue with his judgement

MCMikey

If the solicitor kept that money that sounds very wrong unless there's another beneficiary involved and that is where it's destined.

Difficult when you're feeling low and crushed, but please try and reach out for advice as I and others have pointed to.

emacov

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087920#Comment_1087920

The solicitor doesn't have the money yet as house has to be sold for him to get the money. He has just been awarded by judge. I am beneficiary and part owner of house. Although house is only worth about £130,000. I wanted to stay in house until it was sold but so,icitor decided it would sell better without me being there

If house is not sold within next 30 days Santander has said they are repossesing which I think will stop solicitors claim on house? I'm not sure but I think mortgage lender would have precedence over solicitor? I haven't been able to keep up with mortgage now I have to pay for flat I'm currently residing in plus full council tax on house. At least I'm never lonely as all creditors phone me constantly asking for money. I did email solicitor to let him know my position although I really don't know why as the only time he contacts me is when he wants some paperwork signing. Think it has something to do with me being part owner but I don't really know as i can't really see what he wants me to sign due to my eyesight problems. I should have just waited for what happened when Santander repossessed. But im my own worst enemy as I don't feel right keeping information to myself. Always feel I have to let everyone involved know. I wish solicitor felt as honourable as I do. But that's life I guess

emacov

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087898#Comment_1087898

Thank you Trevor. More than money I need someone who can advise me. I need to know why solicitor can take money from house. I know judge has decided he can but I don't understand why.

Trevor_PIP

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1087940#Comment_1087940

I can't understand it, you need to get advice. Members have given you some links use them. You must try as it's like stealing your property and leaving you broke. Somethings wrong here. If I knew a Solicitor I would be asking how can this happen on your behalf...