Friends

chris50
chris50 Community Member Posts: 11 Listener
in Everyday life

I have noticed when I get older friends disappear. I am 50 . I don't have friends. I don't chat to anyone apart from mum and daughter. Being alone can get you down. So I listen to music. Anyone else feeling alone at times

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Comments

  • ColonelBlink
    ColonelBlink Community Member Posts: 696 Pioneering

    I am more alone than that, but rarely think about it. At least you manage to distract yourself with music. 👍️

  • Emilee
    Emilee Community Member Posts: 529 Pioneering

    I have found the same thing @chris50.

    The few people I speak to are at work and I dread to think what will happen when I am no longer able to work. I don't have any family or friends and it can really get you down sometimes. At home I listen to the radio a lot which helps.

    I have never been very good at maintaining friendships though, so I'm not sure it will change, I'm not good at small talk.

  • Rolaliton228
    Rolaliton228 Community Member Posts: 12 Listener

    You're definitely not alone, Chris. Many people feel exactly the same way at 50. It’s good that you’re reaching out here - this community is a great place to chat and feel a bit more connected

  • Amberpearl
    Amberpearl Community Member Posts: 3,931 Championing

    I'm. Very lonely

    I live alone

    Have cats

    My 3 daughters don't live close by

    My parents are dead

    I watch tv

    Listen to music

  • SheffieldMan1976
    SheffieldMan1976 Posts: 1,695 Connected

    In Junior school back in the 80s, I had a small circle of folk I was proud to call my friends, sadly I haven't seen hide nor hair of any of them for nearly 40 years.

  • chris50
    chris50 Community Member Posts: 11 Listener

    @SoapySoutar @Emilee @Rolaliton228 @Amberpearl @SheffieldMan1976 . I feel your pain. I love music. I wish we all could meet up would love to have new friends. I am in Blackpool. Amber I love cats . Hugs to you all.

  • Holly_Scope
    Holly_Scope Posts: 5,372 Online Community Team

    What type of music do you like @chris50? Or are you like me and like a bit of everything?

  • chris50
    chris50 Community Member Posts: 11 Listener

    @Holly_Scope I use to be a DJ. So like alsorts. 80s best music

  • Holly_Scope
    Holly_Scope Posts: 5,372 Online Community Team

    That's cool! Was that radio station, or somewhere else? Great taste @chris50. 80's music is my kryptonite (and my Mum's). Always gets us singing along.

  • chris50
    chris50 Community Member Posts: 11 Listener

    @Holly_Scope I done radio and local bars . Radio was fun. With a local community radio . With bars you can see people enjoying themselves.

  • Andi66
    Andi66 Community Member Posts: 1,440 Championing

    My daughter lives with me, she's an adult but is at uni ,or work. Or in her room. So we don't really talk. I talk to my sister on the phone. But have no friends. Have cats. Listen to music, and do craft, some bits in the garden.

  • ColonelBlink
    ColonelBlink Community Member Posts: 696 Pioneering

    It's a state of mind, Chris, well, that's how I view such experiences as loneliness. I'm usually too occupied to navel gaze or suchlike.

  • Ross1975
    Ross1975 Posts: 1,128 Championing
    edited April 21

    Apart from speaking to a friend once a week I'm completely alone by choice, and have been since 1999, I never feel lonely luckily.

  • luvpink
    luvpink Community Member Posts: 4,587 Championing

    I have a good circle of friends I see regularly but I do spend quite a lot of time alone which I quite like, apart from feeling bored from time to time.

  • chris50
    chris50 Community Member Posts: 11 Listener

    Thanks for your comments everyone. Just sat here having a cup of tea. Thinking wish I could have a drink with someone and have a chat. Reading comments on here help me .

  • WelshBlue
    WelshBlue Community Member Posts: 1,148 Championing

    When I was working I had loads of friends, then disability/ mental health came in and it was a case of me drifting away, rather than them. I was always extremely outgoing

    Then Social Anxiety crept in, so now whilst not a recluse … I'm more than happy to be by myself. People are always happy to see me, but half an hour and sensory overload kicks in and I can't wait to get away

    I'm lucky to have my wife but I don't know how she copes with having so many friends. Always having to please someone, to be gregarious. I breathe a sigh of relief when even my own daughter goes back down South after a few days.

    … but I guess being Lonely is different to Solitude, and I feel for all youse suffering loneliness

    @chris50 … I know easier said than done, is there any social groups or anything like that you'd be interested in joining ? I know not always an option

    Like you I love my music, listening to it, now writing it. Keeps me as sane as I'll ever be

  • chris50
    chris50 Community Member Posts: 11 Listener

    Hi @WelshBlue thanks for reply. I am bit like yourself with mental health. It can be up and down for me . As for meeting people I wish I could. I try go cafe or a park. So many people cannot trust eachother. It be nice to say to someone. You want come round have a tea or coffee and chat. At least you got a wife and chat to them. Yes I got mum and daughter. I message mum everyday. Not worth messaging daughter she gets back about a week later

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