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Moving on...feels like it’s not gonna happen ...

serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering
Life changed for me around five years ago..
I was social and worked ina managerial role...

for last few years I’ve isolated due to struggles with PTSD

just had a text from a friend I’ve not seen since..
she’s moved on so much, her life has changed in the five years I mention, shes moves to a new house shares The house with a new partner, I’m happy for her but it’s highlighted how time has stood still for me..and just how much it has stood still, and is a very slow progress...In fact feels like I will never move on...can’t imagine a relationship...the reality hits hard..I normally try to be positive and see positive , finding that difficult right now..Feel like time is running out in a lot of ways...I’m a mature lady 

wishing everyone a peaceful day...


 :)
Best Wishes
serenity2 

Replies

  • Lou67Lou67 Member Posts: 868 Pioneering
    Hi Serenity, I feel so similar to yourself, I got divorced after 26years of marriage that was 10 years ago, at first it was a bit strange but then a bit exciting, met new friends was out and about doing new things, but my anxiety and stress crept back worse than before, then my arthritis got so much worse, I’m currently waiting on 2 knee replacements, so hardly out the door as can’t walk much due to severe pain, I’m just so out of shape and sometimes can’t believe my life has come to this, I am lonely at times and think I will be on my own for the rest of my life, then I need to think at least Iv got kids and grandkids that are amazing and there’s some people with nobody around, but if I’m honest I still feel low, sorry Iv went on a bit, I want to wish you well take care 😊
  • serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering
    Hi @Lou67

    thank you so much for your reply, it’s comforting to know I’m not alone...although I do wish you felt better.
    its a horrible feeling isn’t it ? And I try my best to think, like you say, that I’m lucky in some ways, but that emptiness is very real...
    I realise only I can help myself, I’ve been looking at walking clubs, to see if I could find something, but they are mostly groups and I don’t do groups these days, feel like a fish out of water...
    I'm a believer in There’s always some way or something to resolve our problems somehow somewhere, just feeling like a total waste of space right now...I too can’t believe my life has come to this..just as you do..
    don’t apologise, you’ve not gone on..sometimes writing it down actually helps us....just venting it and saying it..

    sounds like we both need plans , something to look forward to...
    once you have had your operations , and things improve , life should feel better ..I hope they happen soon for you...im sure there is a light for us both...it’s just that it’s flickering at the moment..and not feeling too bright ....

    thank you for sharing how you feel with me, I appreciate that....
    sending some lovely vibes your way...get in touch any time  :)

     :)
    Best Wishes
    serenity2 
  • leeCalleeCal Member Posts: 3,383 Disability Gamechanger

    i could say so many things but really all of them would just say 
    Cheer up serenity 🙂


  • WestHam06WestHam06 Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,273 Pioneering
    Hi @serenity2
                            I'm really sorry that you feel the way you do, it must be very difficult for you. I admire your approach about being positive, I too approach life with that attitude, but it can be hard to maintain this feeling, especially when the way you are feeling feels very real for you. Sometimes, it is ok to just not be ok, to have a day or two where you just accept you feel the way you do, it may help you to move forward. I believe we, as humans, often compare ourselves to others and it can make us feel as though we are not good enough, but the truth is we are. I have Cerebral Palsy and this affects me differently everyday so sometimes one day I can do something and the next  day I can really struggle with it. My disability caused me a lot of emotional turmoil in my teens and early twenties but as I have developed I have found ways to deal with it. Sometimes you can feel like you're not moving forward but you are because each day we develop as individual's, we just don't always realise it. I hope that things improve for you soon and I apologies if my post does not make sense, I am sending you best wishes. I have a quote I made up, to my knowledge no-one has thought of it before, apologies if they have, and I use it when I need too, I hope you don't mind me sharing it with you. 'You mean something, to someone, somewhere'. Thank you for sharing with us. 
  • katho31katho31 Posts: 694 Member
    Hi there @serenity2 :) just had a little cry from reading your post, not in a bad way, just so many things you have said and experiencing ring very true, not only to myself, but many others, we will chat very soon  :) as @WestHam06 quoted 'you mean something, to someone,somewhere'.  Such a beautiful thing to wirte and so very true xx <3
  • janer1967janer1967 Member Posts: 9,331 Disability Gamechanger
    @serenity2 I too am moved by your post and even though my circumstances are different I too went through this stage when I became disabled. 

    I had just gone through a very emotional breakdown of my marriage a few months before becoming disabled and left to bring up our son alone too. I lost my job my home and my self confidence and due to my disability thought I would spend the rest of my life alone

    I have since after 3 years alone found a wonderful partner who accepts me for what I am and it was very hard to get back to being ready to try and find love again as I was also a mature lady with a disability and a teenage son so didnt think anyone would want me

    Talking is good and communicating and we are here to support you any way we can
  • Lou67Lou67 Member Posts: 868 Pioneering
    Thanks @serenity2 take care 💕💕💕
  • serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering
    @leeCal thanks so much , I appreciate your reply 🌻
     :)
    Best Wishes
    serenity2 
  • serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering

    @WestHam06 what a beautiful saying! So kind of you and I’m so sorry for the struggles you’ve had in your life...you have such a good outlook on things..thank you for taking time to reply to me, means Such a lot! 
    The lovely replies here have touched me 🌻
     :)
    Best Wishes
    serenity2 
  • serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering
    Hi @katho31
    im so touched by the replies here. Gives faith in human nature..thank you for your reply, it’s appreciated by me very much ..
    my fab liverpool fc pal...👍 I miss liverpool ! 
    Lovely wishes to you 🌻

     :)
    Best Wishes
    serenity2 
  • serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering
    Hi @janer1967 thank you so much for your reply. 
    Sharing our inner thoughts and feelings isn’t always the easiest thing to do, it makes me feel rather vulnerable, but it’s good for the soul..and I thank you for sharing About what was an emotionalLy very difficult  Time of your life, and the inspiration in how you picked up the pieces And nice things happened...I appreciate you telling us that..Hope is a wonderful thing...

    I send you lovely  wishes ! 🌻
     :)
    Best Wishes
    serenity2 
  • WestHam06WestHam06 Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,273 Pioneering
    Hi @serenity2
                             Thank you so much for your kind response. I believe you sharing you're experiences with us has touched many people on the community. I am pleased that you have had such a positive response as I feel that what you have shared rang very true with many people, it takes courage to do that so I thank you. We are all here to support one another. Thank you. 
  • serenity2serenity2 Member Posts: 206 Pioneering
    Hi @WestHam06
    yes I realised a lot of us have similar feelings, or have had similar feeling..there is some comfort in knowing we have each other for sure ..
    thank you for being kind..kindness means a lot to us ..LFC this evening..hoping for a win...but it’s football, so who knows 🤣
    take good care !
     :)
    Best Wishes
    serenity2 
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