Struggling with mental health

lavenderfields

Just feeling like I don’t want to be here anymore, I feel so anxious, lonely and depressed

I’m living independently for the first time

I don’t work and I have no social life

Very close to my mother but not able to spend as much time with her, now we’re living apart, I sometimes go to her house just to get out but I’m still alone as she works full time

A peer supporter via mental health team reached out to me a couple weeks ago but I didn’t know what help to ask for, I don’t know what to do with myself, I’m scared to engage, I don’t really have any hobbies and I only go out to places with my mum when she’s free off work

I feel like a terrible burden to her sometimes

My thoughts are slipping back into suicidal and self harm, I have nothing to focus on and I’ve overdosed twice before

I’ve taken many different antidepressants over the years, tried some cbt, but now want to avoid medication as I don’t like all the side effects and I don’t really feel it fixes the problem. I also don’t know how to fix my problems as i’m autistic and have social anxiety

I just want these horrible feelings to stop 😢

Agnia

Hi @lavenderfields , i would like to write to you please that im really very truly sorry that you feel so anxious, lonely and depressed, im sending you warm hugs ♥️ right now and my support ,

Please take care of yourself the best you can for the time being, im sending you all my best wishes.

Kind regards to you ♥️

Agnia

Hi @lavenderfields , please i just would like to mention that maybe you could consider to call The Samaritans on 116 123 they are very kind and friendly people they will listen to you without the judgement , i did call them many times in the past and they are very kind people.

Best wishes to you, please take care.

lavenderfields

Thank you @Agnia ♥️

It would be nice to have someone to talk to, if anyone reading this needs a friend I am also here!!

I don’t know how the private message feature works or start a convo here 🫶

lavenderfields

I have texted Samaritans before, it helps a bit but still feel alone @Agnia

Agnia

@lavenderfields ♥️ im really truly sorry that you feel alone, really.

im sending you a very warm hugs right now ♥️🙏🌷 , please maybe you could consider to try to watch a movie? It does help me to feel less alone . Best wishes to you.

Bluebell21

Hi @lavenderfields I am sorry you are finding things so difficult at the moment. We are a friendly and supportive forum, so please have a look around and join in when you are ready.

You need to be Rank Contributor with 50 points to start using private messages.

You have 20 points at the moment. You get points from another member liking your posts and for badges.

To start a conversation just post like you have with this post or join in on another members.

Take care.

Charlie_Scope

Hello @lavenderfields. Thank you for reaching out, it can be the hardest thing to do. It looks like you're already making some nice connections on here and I hope you find the support helpful. We've also sent you an email so please look out for that.

luvpink

@lavenderfields

Hi and welcome to the community.

So sorry to hear you are feeling that way.

Sending you love and hugs. 💕

Agnia

Hi @lavenderfields ,

Please , i would like to ask you - how are you today? im wishing you a pleasant day ahead , and im sending you warm hugs, please take care of yourself.

Kind regards and best wishes.

lavenderfields

Hi @Agnia thanks for asking,

I woke up feeling pretty crappy and emotional. I sent a text to the support worker who reached out to me before but haven’t heard anything yet. I hope she will reply today.

How is your day going so far?

lavenderfields

Hi @luvpink thank you 🙂

Agnia

Hi @lavenderfields , thank you for replying to me , and im really sorry that you woke up feeling crappy and emotional, and i really do hope that your support worker will contact you very soon, Thank you for asking im watching a movie now called - My best friend Anne Frank

Please take care. ♥️

lavenderfields

@Agnia hope you enjoy your movie

lavenderfields

I don’t know what to do with myself, I hate being home alone all day, I’ve taken my dog for a walk already will go for another one soon. I just feel sad I have nothing to do but think that I shouldn’t be here

Agnia

Thank you very much,

@lavenderfields ♥️

Albus_Scope

Hey @lavenderfields a belated welcome to the community. 😊

I'm also autistic and have pretty crippling social anxiety, so I can empathise to some degree. Everyone's different of course. I also hate taking antidepressants, but still do as once they do start working, they definitely make a difference to me, but it usually takes about two months of feeling worse, which isn't great!

You said you don't really have a social life and don't really have any hobbies. But are there any things you'd like to try doing?

lavenderfields

@Albus_Scope I wouldn’t mind trying anything in order to find a hobby I just need help if I’m going to join something leaving the house

Albus_Scope

Gotcha, ok then @lavenderfields let's do process of elimination. You could always try something that wouldn't involve leaving the house? That way, if you don't feel up to going out, you can still do your hobby, hopefully with other people online too. 😊
I found gaming's great for that, but I know it's not for everyone.

lavenderfields

@Albus_Scope I don’t game

Albus_Scope

As said, it's not for everyone, it was just a suggestion. 😊 There's so many hobbies that have huge online communities these days, so there's always someone to chat to. Just have a think about something you'd like to try. 😊