Going to Leave My Job

CC59He

Going to leave my job after three weeks I did try. Yesterday I went to a meeting with my boss’s senior; my boss wouldn’t even look at me. They had this big pull across door which they never use in the time I worked there; soon as I went in they used it nobody wanted to talk to me pulled it shut. I went in even after what had happened in the office, with simply writing an email to say I felt uncomfortable when I was by myself with my boss. I made some points to discuss, but she just didn’t want to listen instead she pulled out a folder on an investigation she had been doing whilst she had put me on annual leave and took my boss that happens to be her in son in law's word over mine which I kind of expected. She made me out to be a liar, saying things like ‘it’s not all about you’, ‘how dare you throw back my act of generosity back at me?’, when all I did was ask why the week of annual leave when all I did was one simple email asking to discuss my concerns. When I did bring up about ACAS getting advice she said they were all wrong, and ‘whatever.’

I went in with an open mind, but she just wasn’t interested. She then said she had a HR consultant that she was getting advice and was writing down what I said the whole thing just made me very uncomfortable. The main reason I didn’t feel happy was the fact I was made out to be stupid because I was autistic, I was made to feel like I couldn’t use a computer properly to transport such as the bus and the train. I simply asked her that I wanted to feel equal just as anyone else in the office, not to feel different. She just said ‘you always say that don’t you?’, and that ‘I was the one who should be listening to her.’ She then pulled out the file she put together on me, and told me she had taken statements from all the staff about me, and they said how they didn’t like me and I didn’t fit in. Just felt really hurtful, I really tried my best to fit in. I know I am different, but I did try.

I think the worst bit is that my boss’s senior said I was in the wrong for leaving work early that day before annual leave, she said ‘I should have put you on compassionate leave so it would be on your record.’ She had also been in contact with the people who funded my internship, and said that day you left ‘you must have been one heck of a state’; she made feel so horrible and got nasty and so toxic. The whole workplace was so I am going to leave. Just waiting to see what she emails me first as part of ‘the investigation.’ All because I rose the concern that I wanted to be talked to normally, not have my disability made fun of. My boss got to put his statement in, and she took his word over mine and just said no that’s not true, well I have information that states otherwise. I went in hoping to give the job another go, but ended up being attacked all sides so just gave up. I contacted the people who funded my internship and they just had the attitude ‘deal with it yourself.’

I think the worst bit was she kept saying ‘other people this’, ‘other people would understand that’, and maybe you don’t know how an office works. Honestly one of the nastiest experiences ever had and to be turned on felt horrible. I felt embarrassed to cry on the bus home, but after all the work I put in and everything. She even said ‘I don’t even know if you did the work properly in the first place.’ I did turn round and say I wanted to give the job a go, ‘not sure about that’, and that I am still not allowed in the office at all. Feels pretty disgusting, but I guess it’s of the culture ‘put up and shut up.’  I just felt so angry how she made me out to be, I went there with an open mind and just got a file of information she had made on me in my face. Didn’t even know what it all said and what all for? When she could have just talked things through, but as she told me ‘that would have been pointless as you don’t understand anything I say.’

Alex_Alumni

Hi again @CC59He, I'd definitely stay in touch with ACAS if you can, they have some helpful information on what to do if you experience discrimination in work, talk to them about what's happened and hopefully they will help with your next steps. 

It might also be worth getting in touch with your local MP, especially if your internship was organised through your local authority, or through a government scheme. 

I'm really sorry to hear about the response from your internship, do they have anywhere to register complaints?

You should never be made to feel wrong for being who you are, and you have a right to ask for adjustments or for things to be handled in the way which is accessible to you. You are worthy of support, so if there's anything more you feel we can do to help. please ask.

CC59He

Alex_Scope said:

Hi again @CC59He, I'd definitely stay in touch with ACAS if you can, they have some helpful information on what to do if you experience discrimination in work, talk to them about what's happened and hopefully they will help with your next steps. 

It might also be worth getting in touch with your local MP, especially if your internship was organised through your local authority, or through a government scheme. 

I'm really sorry to hear about the response from your internship, do they have anywhere to register complaints?

You should never be made to feel wrong for being who you are, and you have a right to ask for adjustments or for things to be handled in the way which is accessible to you. You are worthy of support, so if there's anything more you feel we can do to help. please ask.

CC59He

Alex_Scope said:

Hi again @CC59He, I'd definitely stay in touch with ACAS if you can, they have some helpful information on what to do if you experience discrimination in work, talk to them about what's happened and hopefully they will help with your next steps. 

It might also be worth getting in touch with your local MP, especially if your internship was organised through your local authority, or through a government scheme. 

I'm really sorry to hear about the response from your internship, do they have anywhere to register complaints?

You should never be made to feel wrong for being who you are, and you have a right to ask for adjustments or for things to be handled in the way which is accessible to you. You are worthy of support, so if there's anything more you feel we can do to help. please ask.

REPLY: 

Hi Thank you, I did ring ACAS, and they gave me some phone numbers, I tried the Disability Law Service but just went to voicemail. Thank you so much for the advice and help, I am going to look at complaining for sure think it just feels a bit overwhelming and frustrating at the minute. Means a lot thank you, so very true about never being made to feel wrong who you are. I can't believe I got so much nastiness all because I asked to be made to feel equal. What made me think as well was one of the numbers I rang said the guy you complained about he never got anything did he. Which he didn't all the blame was on me. What was hurtful was having the door shut on me, and none of the staff liked me just because I was different / didn't fit in. I think everyone should get a chance, at least I tried to be nice fit in even though it was hard.