Behaviour — Scope | Disability forum
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Behaviour

5ha8z
5ha8z Member Posts: 19 Connected
edited December 2019 in Autism and neurodiversity
My autistic daughters behaviour is becoming hard to deal with as she's getting older. Some days shes ok, other days she will have tantrums. It effects the rest of us,

Comments

  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Member Posts: 6,389 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @5ha8z   Sorry to hear this.

    Please have you contacted the Autistic Society?

    For advice, guidance and information.

    Helpline 020 7833 2299.

    Hope that helps you.

    Please ask anything else further be happy to help and be supportive.

    Please take care.

    @thespiceman


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  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,545 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @5ha8z, this must be really difficult. I hope the links and numbers provided by @thespiceman are helpful.

    How old is your daughter at the moment? I just want to try and give you the most suitable information. 

    I'm also tagging @SparkleSheffieldAutismAdvisors to see if they have any further suggestions.
    Scope

  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,545 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @5ha8z, just wanted to check in to see how you were doing. :)
    Scope

  • 5ha8z
    5ha8z Member Posts: 19 Connected
    Hi @Chloe_Scope, my daughter is doing well thank you, her behaviour is better than before but has started to swear which I'm really worried about. The more I tell her off the more she tends to do it 
  • Geoark
    Geoark Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @5ha8z we had this problem with our daughter, not sure if this will help with your daughter, my solution was to sit her down with a good dictionary and told her to look up all the bad words she knew and I would give her a £1 for each word she could not find.

    Fortunately did not cost me anything, but after learning the meaning of the words she dropped using some and used others less often. 

    When they move onto secondary school they tend to have a lot more freedom and exposed to a wider range of influences. Like 'I hate you' swearing is used to get a reaction, if they are not awarded for using swearing - ie a reaction they tend to use it less. My daughter still swears a lot when upset and I have pulled her on this and her response was she uses it to add emphasis. I can see her 1st in creative writing was worth the work she put in  ;)

    Try recording her when she is swearing a lot and play it back when she is calm, then ask her how she would feel if you spoke to her like that.

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  • 5ha8z
    5ha8z Member Posts: 19 Connected
    @Geoark,,with my daughter is that she does the opposite of what we tell her. We will have to try and not pay attention to her
    Thank you
  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,545 Disability Gamechanger
    Thank you for the update @5ha8z, I hope this calms down without attention. If there is anything we can do to help then please do let us know. :)
    Scope

  • Adrian_Scope
    Adrian_Scope Posts: 8,578 Scope online community team
    Hi @5ha8z. I just wanted to say you're not alone with this. My eldest daughter is 12 and has started swearing almost overnight. I agree with both you and @Geoark, it does seem to be used for attention. The more we push, the more she seems to push back!
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  • 5ha8z
    5ha8z Member Posts: 19 Connected
    Thank you everyone for your replies, 
  • Adrian_Scope
    Adrian_Scope Posts: 8,578 Scope online community team
    I hope things get a little easier. Please keep in touch and let us know how things are going. :)
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