Happy Mother's Day! — Scope | Disability forum
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Happy Mother's Day!

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Tori_Scope
Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,496 Disability Gamechanger
Happy Mother's Day to all of the lovely mothers, mother figures, and mothers-to-be on the community :) 

Being a disabled mum

I still get assumptions made about me. I still get told I’m not like everybody else. I still get told that I can manage now, but I won’t in the future.

But ultimately, every mother is doing her best. Winging 80% of her day. Having fun. Going crazy. And I’m no different. I have good days. I have bad. 
Being a disabled mother can bring about some challenges. If this is something you're facing, you might like to read Molly Carnan's blog on Simply Emma about what it's like being a disabled mum.

Being a mum to a disabled child

  1. Don’t lose touch with friends who don’t have children with additional needs. I often hear people saying “they won’t understand”, but unless you explain, they never will
  2. Do your research at your own pace. The internet is full of useful information but trust your sources.
  3. Speak to people and escalate your concerns if you’re not happy with the outcome. There is always a route to those further up the ladder
  4. If you are employed, speak to your manager about options for flexible working. Many roles do not need to be carried out between specific hours or in a specific place
  5. Wherever possible, take time for yourself. Whether that be going for a walk, meeting up with a friend
  6. Don’t be afraid to speak up and say you’re not coping, we’re all human, not SUPERhuman
Being a mum to a disabled child can be extremely rewarding, but difficult at times too. Why not read Tina Medlock's blog on Special Needs Jungle about working life and special needs parenthood?

If your a mum to a disabled child, and feel you could benefit from some additional support, check out our family services to see if they could help:

If you find Mother's Day hard

Though Mother's Day is an enjoyable day for many, it can be a difficult day for others. This can be for many different reasons. 

Dorset Mind have a blog post about when Mother's Day is a challenge, which is worth a read. 

If you're struggling today, please do reach out to the community :) We're always here for a chat.

Over to you

What are your experiences of motherhood?

Do you have someone you'd like to thank this Mother's Day? This could be your own mum, a mother figure in your life, or someone else who you want to give thanks to.

Are you doing anything special for Mother's Day today?
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Comments

  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,496 Disability Gamechanger
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    Though I'm sure done with the best of intentions, I can imagine that could be quite upsetting @Teddybear12. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter and mum. Though I'm sure you miss them every day, anniversaries and special occasions can be particularly difficult when grieving. 

    Have you tried speaking to her to express that while you appreciate the gesture, you find it more upsetting than comforting? 

    Are you up to anything nice today to take your mind off of things? There's nothing wrong with sitting with your feelings and having a tough day, though!
    National Campaigns Officer, she/her

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  • Ross_Alumni
    Ross_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,652 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hi @Teddybear12

    Sorry to hear about your losses, and how difficult that has made Mothers Day for you. 

    I hope the lunch with your brothers was enjoyable, and that whatever you got up to yesterday you were able to relax. It is a kind gesture from your daughter's friend although I can understand how it doesn't help you to feel better, it's a shame that they didn't get the message the first time around but hopefully once you tell them outright they'll be understanding and the issue can be resolved.
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