Hi, I'm sharonbol! My son is autistic, isolated and hits himself when anxious.

sharonbol

My son is autistic and since leaving school he won’t go out or have anyone talk to him apart from me he hits himself if he gets anxious anyone have any ideas HELP!!

Cher_Alumni

Hello @sharonbol and a warm welcome to our online community, how are you keeping?

Things sound tough for your son, and, I imagine as his mum tough for you too. How are you coping?

The National Autistic Society has a Transition support helpline that sounds just the ticket for supporting you both through this tricky time. The service aims to:

provide advice and support to young autistic people and their families on making the transition from school, further or higher education to adult life.

so I'd strongly recommend getting in touch via the hyperlink above to see what those specialised in this area can offer support-wise. 

Also, do you have any input from Children and Young People's Mental Health Services or your GP in terms of advice about the hitting? If so, I'd encourage you to speak some more with them about alternative coping strategies for his anxiety. 

Just to let you know, I've moved your thread to our Autism and neurodiversity category and amended the title to help others - hopefully with wisdom in this area - see it and respond.

Take care both of you, I hope things get easier soon.

sharonbol

Thanks I tried to get him into a nasas college as he was refused his autistic schools college and nobody had the facilities for him I can get him in the car but he has to have a cover over his head and won’t leave the car I’ve lots of the relevant people involved with him but nobody seems to be able to help but thanks for your advice I appreciate it

L_Volunteer

Firstly, I would like to give you a warm welcome @sharonbol. It is great to see you have joined us. Thank you for reaching out to us. I always appreciate the courage it can take to reach out, especially when you are new and finding things difficult.

As an autistic person, I would like to respond to your thread. Are you aware of any additional triggers that leaving school may have brought your son? Obviously, a key point in transitioning is a key one but I wonder if there’s anything else – such as differences in routine and less time with friends, etc – this is likely to vary for each and every one of us.

It is often only through identifying the root trigger that we can best address the behaviours, such as not going out, not having anyone talk to him (apart from you), and hitting himself.

It sounds really positive that he is willing to talk to you. It sounds like you have a strong attachment with him. How did trying to get him into a NASAS College go for you?

It sounds really difficult that he was refused his autistic school's college. Can I ask on what basis this was refused and if your son has an EHCP – was this based on not having the facilities or something else?

You only need to share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with but advice differs based on these points and I would like to ensure that we provide you with the best possible advice we can.

As I have already mentioned, it would be about identifying the triggers that make your son uncomfortable with leaving the car (as this is a behaviour rather than a cause!). Though, I appreciate this is more difficult done than said.

We are all here for you and listening to you if you would like to talk to us further about this. Hopefully, we can support you with this or at least reassure you that you don’t have to face this alone