London Loneliness

freddie_lamb
freddie_lamb Online Community Member Posts: 7 Listener
edited June 2025 in Coffee lounge

Hi

I became quite severely visually impaired around four years ago. Since then, for whatever reasons, many of my erstwhile friends have 'faded' away. I assume unpalatable reasons which I can't do anything about i.e. suddenly becoming very 'different' and an encumbrance.

Didn't take long after for my ex-partner to leave me. I was falling into mental ruination and she had no obligation to try and save me from that.

And, now, I am living alone (well, with my guide dog), with my nearest friend over 100 miles away, delicate family relations, and no local community at all to speak of.

It would be interesting to know if other people have experienced losing the people you once considered friends, and how you have managed the resulting loneliness. People say you find out who your real friends are, in terms of whom sticks by you. Maybe it's just me and in my life, but I have had far more people move on from me, now I am perceived to not offer anything much positive, than stand by me.

Just interested to know, really. Maybe it is a London issue, and I need to move somewhere with a bit of a soul?

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Comments

  • freddie_lamb
    freddie_lamb Online Community Member Posts: 7 Listener

    Well didn't expect this to go in the direction of the reveling night lfie of Sunderland. People ssay it's a bit of a sh*t hole. Mind you, the London arrogance believes anywhere beyond the M25 is a sh*t hole.

  • freddie_lamb
    freddie_lamb Online Community Member Posts: 7 Listener

    Getting lucky with a quickie on a scooter in more ways than one

  • WhatThe
    WhatThe Online Community Member, Scope Member Posts: 5,482 Championing

    Hi freddie and welcome to Scope 😊

    I have never been to Sunderland but I do agree that Northerners are more friendly and generally more relaxed!

    Very few people I've met in London grew up here and have an extended family around them. I migrated here and got stuck as is often the case but as an older person, I rarely socialise.

    I think a lot of community settings and friendships dwindled when the pandemic took over and it was a lonely time for many people. What benefited me was a community garden where I volunteered with like-minded, gentle people. Outdoors is my happy place, a sensory treat.

    There are members here also dealing with sight loss and you will soon make friends. Scope can give you links to sources of support. Keep posting and enjoy the ride.

  • Steve_in_The_City
    Steve_in_The_City Scope Member Posts: 818 Trailblazing

    Hi @freddie_lamb I hope you are ok. Here is a little story that may amuse you:

    Years ago I had a consultancy right opposite the RNIB building. One afternoon I was going home and a blind man was standing at a little green man crossing. I knew nothing about being disabled (I was clueless) so I asked if I could help him across the road. He said quite sharply I'm effing blind mate, I ain't effing deaf, I can hear the effing signal! So that was me put in my place!

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