In a dark deep spiral.

JazzieJo
JazzieJo Online Community Member Posts: 19 Contributor
in Mental health and wellbeing

Suffered from mental health issues in the past but experienced nothing like this honestly. Everyday I feel myself sinking. Last week I was so burned out I couldn't think straight. So physically tired my body felt like lead.

You know what the worst part has been? Every cry for help is met with 'everyone is struggling', 'everyone has their own issues'. All I hear is 'handle it', 'get over it'.

My psychiatrist said this when I spoke about struggling with no hot water or heating since last November and all the antisocial behaviour from my neighbours.

My family said that when I told them I was really burned out from work and had a meltdown about my driving test.

I failed my driving test yesterday. I made two serious and four minor faults. I wasn't upset that I failed, I was upset because I badly needed this win. I needed to pass to show myself I am 'handling it'. That the dark place I've been in since November was handled. But I was just good at lying to myself.

Comments

  • Therareone1
    Therareone1 Online Community Member Posts: 6 Connected

    Hey, I just want to start by saying: I see you. Truly.

    What you’ve shared is heavy, and it’s so understandable that you’re feeling like you're sinking right now. You appear to be carrying so much — physically, emotionally, mentally and you're not being met with the support and care you deserve.

    It’s not just burnout you’re describing it’s complete depletion, and then being dismissed when you ask for help. That hurts deeply.

    You deserved warmth. You deserved empathy. You deserved someone to say, “That sounds unbearable — how can I support you?” Not “everyone’s struggling.” That’s not care. That’s deflection. I'm here if you'd like a chat and well done for sharing it takes courage to share how you feel.

    Take Care ,speak soon

    Tammy

  • Community_Scope
    Community_Scope Posts: 2,041 Scope Online Community Coordinator

    Hi @JazzieJo

    Sorry to hear this, it sounds like you've been carrying a lot. How you feel is valid and from what you've described it sounds like you've been through a lot.

    We are going to send you an email in a while, please look out for it.

  • Kiki23
    Kiki23 Online Community Member Posts: 184 Empowering
    edited June 26

    @JazzieJo

    You wrote,

    "You know what the worst part has been? Every cry for help is met with 'everyone is struggling', 'everyone has their own issues'. All I hear is 'handle it', 'get over it'.

    My psychiatrist said this when I spoke about struggling with no hot water or heating since last November and all the antisocial behaviour from my neighbours.

    My family said that when I told them I was really burned out from work and had a meltdown about my driving test"

    I relate to your post more than you know…Its like were made to feel that our pain/illness and suffering is not being believed. What also hurts is that no one seems to acknowledge how hard it is to express what we are feeling in the first place despite the great strength, courage and ENERGY it takes to be so vulnerable on our part…Its like im surrounded by people who lack compassion and empathy and cant understand why I dont receive it back especially when I give it so freely..Bizzare really

    Im just so tired of being misunderstood all the time…So tired……

    Sending you a gentle hug

  • llou
    llou Online Community Member Posts: 4 Listener

    I’ve been feeling like this too and been hearing everyone struggling, it’s so hard, please know that your feelings are valid and your struggles care real , the water and heating is so stressful can u contact landlord or council welfare and see if they could help I hope you find some support soon

  • SadOldPanda
    SadOldPanda Online Community Member Posts: 37 Empowering

    What is it with psychiatrists and lack of empathy?! Normal therapists are much kinder. Are you being seen by talking therapies? You can self refer.

    But I hear you, having someone tell you to get over it when you are barely holding on is brutal. It's invalidating and makes you feel like you are the problem, you aren't you are doing your best to keep your head above water and it's hard, you need to acknowledge that you are doing what you can in horrible circumstances.

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