old funny poem (adult humour but not explicit or vulgar)

Oh Angus was a happy man for soon he would be wed
he'd found a brisk and bonnie lass, flaming locks of red
happier still his mother was that he had found a life
for truth be told she'd often feared she'd be stuck with him for life

In honour of the grand affair the wedding day would be
she set about to weave a kilt, the finest ever seen
the night before the wedding the kilt was nearly done
so she called young Angus over and she tried it on her son

She wrapped the kilt around him and she wound and wound and wound
and when she finished winding it was still 8 yards too long
never fear, my bonnie boy, we can simply cut it off
and to your bonnie bride we will give the extra cloth

well Angus was so pleased, you know his heart had swelled with pride
he couldn't wait another moment to show it to his bride
twas raining so he grabbed his cloak to shield him on the moors-
but in his haste to be away the kilt caught in the door.

Angus was in such a rush to show off for his bride
he never even noticed that he'd left his kilt behind

He made his way to Bridget's house and cried "let me in I pray
there's something that you've got to see before our wedding day"

Bridget says "I'll let you in, but love, you cannot stay
I've got to get a bit o' rest before our wedding day"

"Twill only take a minute love, but it's so grand my dear…
You've simply got to see what I've got hiding under here!"

Angus throws the cloak aside- and there he stood, quite bare-
with only Mother nature's gift displayed to her right there!

Bridget blushed and said she was impressed at the thing that she'd be shown-
Angus cried "And this is nothing! I've got 8 more yards at home!"