I need advice

I don't know if this is the right place, so forgive me if it isn't. Before becoming disabled I used to do martial arts, I've been bullied, dismissed, ignored and undermined my whole life and martial arts was the only thing that gave me any confidence, self esteem and feeling that I wasn't vulnerable anymore. Ive been disabled since 2023 and I constantly feel the need to fight. Not verbally, but physically fight, I've never been in one and now im in a wheelchair it feels like i missed out on an opportunity or rite of passage. I know it sounds dumb, but it's how I feel. Things to do with fighting like video games, anime and other media set me off on a depressive episode. I can't stop thinking about it. I want to do wheelchair boxing as I think it would help greatly, but im unsure of signing up as im on Universal Credit and can't actively work. I don't want them to turn around and say "if you can do boxing, you can get a job", as obviously its not the same. I don't know what to do, this is eating away at me.