Trying to find a representative for tribunal is impossible

How do I find a representative for my tribunal (PIP/WCA).

I have to admit that I just can't do this myself in any way that gets my lived experience across without confusing people.

I can't organise what's in my head so it comes out in away that makes sense. My executive and working memory dysfunction is so poor I can't recall all the aspects of many conditions into and answer, I latch onto the first thing rhtcomes to mind and completely forget the rest.

I have no organisational skills whatever way I try to write notes,everything ends up in chaotic piles and piles leading to overwhelm and and shutdown.

LLate Doasgnosed but always known I secretly couldn't do things and have a system for every aspect of my life. Being diagnosed hasn't made any difference in a positive way. I'm too old now after being missed as a child to retest me for learning difficulties (which I have).

Mr doctor referred me to a social prescriber but she spoke to me once and never replied to my emails.

I desperation I reached out to SEAS as I thought, they at least will understand my complex layers and how my brain works (or doesn't). They didn't reply either and that was 1 weeks ago.

I'm so tired of this life and the constant struggle. I have no friends and no family and every day I ask myself why am I here. I have one good reason, 1!

That is the only reason I continue through this nightmare called life that is becoming increasing difficult. I can't follow steps. I had to reset my password 10x just to get into my bank account once. It happens every time I try to log into nearly every account I have online. Reset, reset, reset, reset.

Finally I know why I can't do many things. Finally have the courage to ask for help, only to find I have yo function on a higher level to get it.

If ai have to represent myself at the tribunals I will never be able yo explain myself, when I don't understand myself.

My doctor has given my not fit for work fit notes for the last 2 years. Has written different things on them each time as she said she can't write everything.

II don't know what to do. I have been that silent generation who just got on with it, never asking for help. Never knowing what help was there. Never knowing how to get help. And finally when trying to get it, findng out you're always a tick box (barrier) away.