20 year old child waiting for autism assessment, how can I support them best? — Scope | Disability forum
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20 year old child waiting for autism assessment, how can I support them best?

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Jean Eveleigh
Jean Eveleigh Scope Member Posts: 185 Pioneering
in Children, parents, and families
Bit of background my child spent most of their life living away from me and the only contact I was allowed a letter twice a year.

They still don't live with me but we have been in full contact for just over 14 months.  We discussed lots of medical issues we both have, but the one I am finding the hardest to navigate is the fact they are waiting for an autism assessment and diagnosis.

I am doing my best to support them, respecting their sexual orientation, gender identity and change of name etc, and when talking on the phone, text message and video chat we are going well but the only time so far we have met face to face was mixed we did an activity that was mostly successful even with crowds then we went to a pre-booked venue for a meal I had booked and unfortunately my child struggled to cope with the business of the place (noise, crowds etc.

We are meeting again in a few days and the venue should be much quieter but if they do find they are struggling again what can I do to help other than telling them to put their headphones on?
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  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,978 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hello @Jean Eveleigh. Thank you for reaching out to us. I can hear that things are difficult for you at the moment.

    In particular, it sounds like you are struggling to know how to support your 20-year-old with potential autism in busy and noisy places.

    As you said, it can be useful to remind them that they usually find headphones helpful. Some other things that might help include:

    • Moving to a quieter and less busy space - you can let your 20-year-old guide you with this since they will likely know where works best for them
    • Going during quieter and less busy hours (peak times probably won't work best!) 
    • Communicating with your 20-year-old in advance to see what they might find helpful if it is busy and loud

    I hope this helps. If you have any further questions or wish to talk to us further about this please don't hesitate to reach out to us. 

    We are all here for you and listening to you. Take care for now and we will look forward to, hopefully, hearing from you again soon  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
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