Why am I still stuck between busy men and lazy men? And how can you tell if a guy is a real good guy — Scope | Disability forum
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Why am I still stuck between busy men and lazy men? And how can you tell if a guy is a real good guy

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Splatmate24
Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 380 Courageous
edited April 2023 in Dating, sex, and relationships
Two of the guys that have been texting one who didn't reply. The new guy I've been messaging also said he's sorry, but he's been busy. The first guy that i met up with but didn't meet up again since he was too busy and left it. I got a reply after i stop messaging and began texting the new guy instead. I don't want a guy to be lazy but i prefer a guy that can let me know right away if he is going to be busy. The new guy that has been texting did let me know when he was going to work or when he was busy. the other did a first date but stopped after a week. Should I have just given up? Both of us met on online dating sites. The new guy has a learning disability. What should i do and has become bit confused , if you can let me know straghit, then i don't have to worry about this thing. Online dating is one type of Facebook dating. the new guy live closer to me then other guy. What makes a good guy different from a fake good guy?
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  • Cher_Alumni
    Cher_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,741 Disability Gamechanger
    edited April 2023
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    Hello @Splatmate24

    How are things going with you and dating? I can see this was from the beginning of March and I wondered if you'd met anyone nice or were giving it a break for now?

    I think your gut instinct will tell you whether someone is genuine with their intent. No one's perfect but when you meet the right person for you, you shouldn't have too many questions, but rather feel assured that they're authentic with their feelings for you  <3
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  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 380 Courageous
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    @Cher_Scope
    that was a bit long time ago and thanks has change with a new men that i been texting sometimes and sometimes will reply . the two the i did put in my question i'm not that interested in two them and did give up with them and did found someone else to text and did had phone call . is was bad but is was also mixed . i was on two dating sites that one was Facebook dating and one was app called badoo that has some success and some not . i saw a men in the said his age was 33 year old and starting texting then let me know that he was from badoo and sent a message on Facebook .  I was one that i call him since he ask to and is was quick call . has more things in common interest then other two men .
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  • 2oldcodgers
    2oldcodgers Posts: 743 Connected
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    Oh how I feel your pain.
    In my day you met the opposite sex either in a pub, nightclub, school, or some other establishment where people of similar age gather.
    I met my wife in what you would say was a dive of a nightclub in Manchester- I think it is now known as the O2 it was the Ritz. I was working as a live musician and noticed how different she looked  from all of the others. In between sets I invited her and her friend to come and sit with us at our reserved table for a chat over drinks. After 30 mins I realised that she was the one for me. 43 years later we are still married to each other. 
    Texting, facebook etc is a very poor substitute for actually meeting someone for the first time and having a face to face conversation.
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  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 380 Courageous
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    @2oldcodgers that not how is now with dating and some just met through friends but mainly has be more people meeting off online dating sites or apps . since they don't seem to bother anymore to approach women and i also be rejected more then once when is comes to guys in real life that i met through youth club and one was already my ex cheater ex-boyfriend from college that i was met . the other two was one already got a girlfriend and other was very rude and underage of alcohol and yep i even ask my friend and they all said no i don't know any single guys . what choice do i have . nothing in real life .nobody interest or i'm not interest in any guys that i made friends with . so online dating is the only choice since i can only date men with a learning disability or i can't not date at .

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  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,978 Disability Gamechanger
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    It doesn't sound like you have had the best experiences with guys @Splatmate24. However, I would like to remind you, you have all the choices - it is you that takes care of yourself and keeps yourself safe. You don't have to be with anyone if you don't want to be and when you do it is your choice who to be with  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
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  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,978 Disability Gamechanger
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    Thanks for sharing your experience with us @2oldcodgers and how lovely you had this experience  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
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