Why do some guys stop texting me when I put a lot of effort into it, but respond more when I don't? — Scope | Disability forum
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Why do some guys stop texting me when I put a lot of effort into it, but respond more when I don't?

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Splatmate24
Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 380 Courageous

It seems that when guys stop texting me so soon, I put too much effort into it. Some guys responded, "I'm sorry I'm too busy.". when I didn't think about what I texted. I replied OK. I'm good. They seem to be responding more often. I don't always reply to some guys because they say they're too busy. I make myself look busier than these men. Why is it happening that i don't seem to bother to reply anymore and find someone who will reply and not be too busy or too lazy .

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  • ShirleyW
    ShirleyW Community member Posts: 355 Pioneering
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    There's an old saying about relationships  -  "Treat 'em mean to keep 'em keen"
    I think that's what's happening with you.
  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,978 Disability Gamechanger
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    It sounds positive they are responding more often @Splatmate24. How does this make you feel?

    As always, I am really proud of you for asserting those boundaries of yours too. I can hear how someone finding time for you is really important to you  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 380 Courageous
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    @L_Volunteer some guys were OK but other guys that live too far were too eager . that not good side . also had one men asking out to be girlfriend and not straight away . other guys seem to be too busy or going to fast that is not a good side . is one of red flags if a men goes to fast and can also be a bit red flag if a man is too busy .
  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,978 Disability Gamechanger
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    Oh, what does too eager look like for you @Splatmate24? Everyone has a different definition for this. Though, it is really positive you are aware of this and what it looks like for you.

    Keep recognising those red flags, you want to see more green flags and less red flags in an ideal world. Those boundaries of yours are really important in this process  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 380 Courageous
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    @tomm people don't even talk on phone anymore . if one voice calling through a apps or a video call .i prefer a video call since i can see them straight away without any missed they missed any or make a up excuse then i'm not going to be interested in talking to more and will blocked them

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