Advice on support for 2 boys (ASD)

jal

Hi there, I’m just wondering what support I could look into getting to get some respite.  Is there any such thing!? 

I have a 12 year old at home full time with long covid for past 15 months (likely ASD) and a 10 year old ASD. Both require significant amounts of energy and emotional / time input to maintain mental health. 

My mum is also poorly with cancer and requires significant time for mental health care and hospital lifts/visits. 

My husband does his best to help but he has to work full time and recently started as self employed.

I can’t actually imagine that there is anyone who could fill my shoes (not meant in an egotistical way at all!) and offer enough help but I’m feeling pretty drained and starting to not feel able to give the support to the level I need to for the boys ongoing needs. 

Perhaps there are grants available to help pay for extra support or other ideas of ways to get some help. I don’t know. Just thought I’d put it out there. Thanks for reading if you’ve got this far! Thoughts welcomed.  

chiarieds

Hi @jai - & welcome to the community. You certainly have a lot on your plate at the moment. I don't know if this will be at all helpful, but perhaps a beginning: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/social-care-and-support-guide/support-and-benefits-for-carers/carer-breaks-and-respite-care/

Please know our members are also very supportive; may have other ideas, but will also be here for you to chat with any time. My best wishes to yourself & for your husband's self employment.

L_Volunteer

Hey @jal. I can only re-iterate what @chiarieds has already said. In addition to this, have you considered contacting your local authority for enabling support? 

Enabling support can take care of your children and take them out etc which would give you some respite. In addition to usual childcare routes etc. 

Similarly, have you spoken to your GP about support with your mum - for example, Mcmillan?

It sounds like you are dealing with a lot at the moment and it is really important you are looked after too.

Please do not hesitate to let us know if there's anything else we can do to support you or if you have any questions. We are here to support you 

jal

Thank you both @chiarieds and @L_Volunteer I’ll check out the link, looks a good place to begin. 

I’ll also check out Macmilan for my mum but she’s pretty tricky and relies heavily on me alone to support her mentally and tends to dismiss others. 

Thank you for your thoughts and sign posting. Much appreciated. 

L_Volunteer

That sounds particularly difficult for you @jal because it means you have the responsibility if your mum is not happy with other people supporting her. How are you coping with everything at the moment?