Following my use of body language and attempts to approach men without success, what do you suggest? — Scope | Disability forum
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Following my use of body language and attempts to approach men without success, what do you suggest?

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Splatmate24
Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 388 Courageous
edited February 12 in Dating, sex, and relationships
I have tried being direct with using body language and also done approaching men directly but hasn't been successful. I been rejected when i had approach some men and i do direct body language and men still hasn't approach me even i give green light signal with smiling, blinking, touching my hairs and still hasn't had any success with getting into a new relationship and i had tried online dating too and hasn't be successful at all and yep i also done real life social events that are not many in my towns for people with a learning disabilities has to go into city centre and they not much but apart from pubs, disco and raving that is only type of social events for learning disabilities are at the moment. Nothing with common interest with me. They don't seem to do social events that I like. What can i do to get be more successful when comes to finding serious men and i can only date men with a learning disabilities thanks to my mum putting in very strict rules when comes to only me dating men with a learning disabilities only. What can i do to get be more successful when comes to finding serious men and i can only men with a learning disabilities
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Comments

  • Lou67
    Lou67 Community member Posts: 7,423 Disability Gamechanger
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    @Splatmate24
    Hi sorry you still haven’t found that special one.
    I definitely think if you stop looking it might just happen.

    Good luck 😊
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  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 388 Courageous
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    @Lou67 yep i stopped looking for special and still not happening at all .
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  • Lou67
    Lou67 Community member Posts: 7,423 Disability Gamechanger
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    @Splatmate24
    I think just if you stop looking altogether it’ll happen when you least expect it. It’s  just a suggestion. 
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  • rubin16
    rubin16 Community member, Scope Member Posts: 612 Pioneering
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    I'm having problems with dating nurotypical people, they just don't understand me and eventually break my heart or go off me and leave me. I want to date someone similar to me too and is nurodiverse but I don't know where to look. I have tried some dating sites but they are full of bots and expensive for a subscription.

    So you are not alone in the struggle.
    I have Autism, ADHD, Schizophrenia, Gilberts Syndrome and Crohn's Disease and have knowledge in these areas.


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  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 388 Courageous
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    rubin16 i can only date men with a moderate learning disabilities only and my mum is very strict with me to when comes to dating and scope is not a dating sites . i can't date men that can drive . i don't like very tall men 
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  • rubin16
    rubin16 Community member, Scope Member Posts: 612 Pioneering
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    Splatmate24 said:
    rubin16 i can only date men with a moderate learning disabilities only and my mum is very strict with me to when comes to dating and scope is not a dating sites . i can't date men that can drive . i don't like very tall men 

    I have autism, ADHD, RSD, Schizophrenia and Bad crohn's disease. I struggle really hard to keep relationships as each time the other person just doesn't understand me and eventually breaks up with me. but I have only dated people who are nurotypical and don't know whats it like to have autism or an learning disability. I need to find a girl who understands me and my conditions and doesn't put me down or takes advantage of me. With my RSD I really have a problem with self esteem and I'm a big people pleaser so will never ever leave a person (they normally leave me).

    I just don't know where to look for someone with similar things to myself or someone who will understand me and not judge me
    I have Autism, ADHD, Schizophrenia, Gilberts Syndrome and Crohn's Disease and have knowledge in these areas.


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  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 388 Courageous
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    rubin i'm sorry but i'm not have simlars learning disabities but i do have diffenet learning disabity that is rare and uncommon .
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  • Hannah_Alumni
    Hannah_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,912 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hello @Splatmate24

    I see the community have been helping with different suggestions!

    Can I ask, out of the box idea, have you ever thought about asking the GP to refer you to a therapist? A lot of people assume therapy is for mental health struggles like anxiety and depression, but therapy is actually a tool that can help us see different approaches to problems. 

    In my experience, I had therapy because of anxiety over my health issues. But once I had more of a grasp on that, therapy helped me talk through solutions to other non-mental health problems I was having. I also think having someone 1 to 1 to chat with would help with going through everything you have done and how it panned out to get some structure. 
    Hannah - She / Her

    Online Community Coordinator @ Scope

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  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 388 Courageous
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    Hannah_Scope yep i had done threapy more then once and i didn't like the group threapy and is only been NHS threapiest only .GP has did refared to more then one threapy and hasn't much work . still feel same .

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  • Hannah_Alumni
    Hannah_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,912 Disability Gamechanger
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    Oh that's such a shame. I didn't like group therapy either! If I can think of anything else of course I'll comment back :) 
    Hannah - She / Her

    Online Community Coordinator @ Scope

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