Feeling lost and lonely

fehmida

I just feel as though I mean nothing I feel lost and like I don’t want to be here .. I don’t sleep with thoughts in my head that my life is nothing I don’t know I’m just tired of fighting this battle in my head

Cantilip

@fehmida thinking of you lying awake feeling miserable. I'm so sorry. Is there anything anyone can do to help? Welcome to the forum.

Bluebell21

Hi @fehmida Welcome to the Community from me too. I am sorry you are feeling so lost at the moment.

If you need someone to talk to the Samaritans will listen . They will not judge or tell you what to do. You do not have to be suicidal to get in touch with them. You can call them anytime day or night from any phone free. 116 123

https://samaritans.org

Please take care of yourself.

Adrian_Scope

Hi @fehmida,

It sounds like things are really overwhelming for you right now, and I can’t imagine how exhausting it must be to constantly fight these thoughts. Reaching out like this is such an important step though, even when it feels like everything is too much.

If you’re struggling with these thoughts, please consider talking to someone who can help. You don’t have to go through this on your own. The Samaritans are available 24/7 at 116 123 if you need someone to listen. You can also text "SHOUT" to 85258 for free, confidential support. Both services are there anytime you need to talk.

Please take care of yourself, and keep reaching out when you can. There are people who care, even when it doesn’t feel that way.

fehmida

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/907464#Comment_907464

thank you so much means a lot that there is someone that cares .. I lost my mum to cancer I was an only daughter I have 2 brothers older than me my life revolved around my mum I looked after her etc since I lost her I feel alone an lost I’m not well my self I’ve tried to end my life a few times it’s not worked .. when I look at my son who is 10 I feel guilty and selfish I prayed to have him for 15 years then I’m angry that I don’t deserve to be here I’m sorry I feel like I’m putting my problems on others wasting peoples time ..

Albus_Scope

Hey @fehmida I'm so sorry you are feeling that way, but as Adrian said, reaching out is often the first step to getting some help and we're all here to talk things through if you need us.
Did you get the email Adrian sent you?

fehmida

hey thank you so much for all your support it means a lot to me ..no sorry I didn’t receive an email?

Albus_Scope

Oh no, how odd! Ok, I'll resend it to the email you signed up with in a second. 😊

fehmida

thank you I’ve received it 🙂

Rachel_Scope

Hi @fehmida just wanted to check how are you're doing today?

fehmida

hi.. not so great just finding it hard to cope I feel as tho I’m worthless ., I confided in a friend who I thought was my friend said if I ever speak or tell anyone I’m finding it hard and struggling my son who is 10 will be taken away from me .. now I’m scared and more worried than ever that if I try to talk to anyone that I’m not going to well my son will be taken away,, I do everything for my so. He’s my world he’s the only thing that keeps me away from bad thoughts of ending things he keeps me going I can’t loose him I’m sorry that I have bothered you guys with my problems I just felt that if I talk to some one it mite help me feel less scared and help me cope with things that overwhelm me I’m sorry once again but thank you for reaching out to me it’s ment a lot that you cared enough to ask me how I was feeling no one has ever done that for me so thank you x

Cantilip

Oh dear! @Adrian_Scope I don't know anything about these things but surely there must be someone @fehmida can talk to in confidence? People have mentioned Samaritans - do they have local groups? I just don't know anything. I was wondering maybe someone F2F?

WhatThe

MIND has local groups who offer support by text and calls if somebody here can source the details..

fehmida, I'm sorry it's so hard at the moment and well done for coming onto Scope to ask for help. Your friend sounds afraid so it's important that you stay online and stay connected. You will find many people here who understand despair.

Catherine21

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/908757#Comment_908757

Oh I feel for you and totally understand when my daughter was young I used to think what an awful mother I am my ex husband didn't help saying I was ! Also having severe mental health problems didn't help I was constantly putting myself down in my head masking so people didn't think I couldn't cope inside I was dying the guiltv the mental pain was torturous no support no family toxic friends felt painfully alone struggled with money on out of jobs my daughter between me and her father so fast forward me and my daughter are incredibly close do I have regrets Yes I do I wish I didn't put myself down believe that I wasn't a good enough mother listen to other people's opinions of me I wish I could turn back time and not hold back my feelings and understand that I was full of love and its not about the material things it's about going to the park feeding the ducks reading stories telling your kids you love them everyday supporting them to grow into a good Human being All mums are amazing especially the ones who are suffering everyday it's not easy but your for from worthless your everything to your son and oneday he will be a man and look after you hold him tight and be kind to yourself at all times your doing amazing

Bluebell21

Hi @fehmida details of MIND

https://www.mind.org.uk