Why I’m Not Attracted to Guys Who Mention Their Exes: A Personal Reflection on Dating Dynamics

MaryDDavis

In my experiences with online and real-life dating, I’ve found myself uninterested in some guys, especially those who bring up their exes. There was one guy I met at a social event who talked about his ex-girlfriend being his best friend, and that turned me off completely. Although he might have been attracted to me, I just couldn't feel the same way.

Curious about this dynamic, I researched and found that mentioning an ex as a “best friend” can be a red flag. I even decided to block all my ex-boyfriends—there are nine of them! Recently, I met a new guy at the same social event, and we went out for fries on Monday. I feel some attraction to him, but I don’t want to rush things. He texted me asking if I’d be his girlfriend, but I replied that we should just wait and see how it goes. It’s also worth noting that this new guy has autism, and he called me before our meetup on Monday.

As I navigate this dating landscape, I’m reflecting on the complexities of attraction and my own boundaries. What do you all think? Does mentioning an ex affect your attraction to someone?

#relationships #dating

egister

For example, your boyfriend will have some kind of emergency, and he will need help, you will not be able to help, but the exes can help. Is this a good reason not to break off relations with the exes? Think a lot of time.

Jimm_Scope

I'm actually a bit of the opposite? I see it as a good sign if someone is able to maintain a good friendship with an ex. It shows a level of maturity I think. Just because you are no longer in a relationship with someone doesn't mean you cannot still be friends with them.

I don't think it's a negative to no longer speak to former partners, but I do not think it's a red flag as long as there are boundaries.

If they talk about their ex(s) in a negative way constantly I'd see that as a red flag personally.