At wits end

Barbs188

Hello my name is Babs and I am new here.

My mum passed away 11 years ago and my brother went to live with my sister and her husband as they had the facilities to care for my brother. They are now in their late 70s and my sister is having chemo for breast cancer and is very ill.

We asked social services for respite and they eventually found a place in a dementia home, but my brother has cerebral palsy but we gave it a go and after 2 days had to bring him home as they left him in bed all day without a drink and a little bit of food in his own waste as they said they did not know how to care for him or know his needs.

As my sister needs to fight her illness and rest and there is no one with facilities to have him we desperately need now to rehome him. I have contacted social services and they said we need to look for a suitable home - where do we start! we have no money so private homes are out and we feel like we are out of our depth

SaraC_Scope

Hi @Barbs188

Welcome to the community. It sounds like you and your family have been a great support to your brother, during a difficult time for you all. It's important your sister has time to look after herself now and make a recovery.

Has your brother had a needs assessment from Social Services, if you are considering permanent residential care? I've included the link to Carers UK Residential Care advice and guidance This site explains the process. You can also request a list of care homes in the area so you and your family can make the best decision.

I hope this information helps. Come back to us if you have any further questions.

Sara

OverlyAnxious

Hi,

Have you had a look at the council website in your area? There should be a section on adult care and hopefully a list of care homes.

Alternatively you can look at the CQC website using your location which also gives a list of care homes. Search Results - Care Quality Commission (cqc.org.uk)

There is the option of local Housing Associations, which do offer supported accommodation, though I fear they won't have any accommodation that can meet your brothers needs.

Regarding funding, has your brother had a needs assessment from social services?

nightjars

I just do not think you should need money, to have someone like your brother, in a suitable care home. Dementia is not cerebral palsy, and your brother needs and deserves the right care. I do not know where you live, but I can tell you ,there are places out there, one near me that would probably take him, as their residents are cp. You need to get him a social worker first, just to see what his needs are. I feel for you that you have this worry . Dont be put off by the way on the CQC ratings. I know of one that is absolutely fine despite its low rating , as I visit it weekly!