Friendship

pooleemily29

@geek84 hi my name is Emily and I'm 29 with Hemiplegic Cerebral Palsy on my right side I honestly get where you're coming from I struggle sometimes I've also been bullied and teased as well it's not nice.

Just wanted to stay hi! 👋

Rachel_Scope

Hi @pooleemily29 😊 I'm so sorry you've been bullied and teased. Is this something you still have to deal with? I really hope not. We have our wonderful CP Network where you can 'meet' others with Cerebral Palsy and get support.

I think this might have been a reply to someone else's post. If I can figure out which one I'll pop it in there 😊

pooleemily29

@Rachel Scope thankyou but I don't suffer with the bullying and testing anymore I think the hardest thing having hemiplegic Cerebral Palsy on my right side is not being about to make new friends or find them because of the government causing th cut backs. I've been to groups and things but the one was walking group and they were abit prejudiced against me because I couldn't walk as them.

I mean don't get me wrong I've been single for a while now too and it's really getting to me I don't have any friends at all I just wanna meet someone who has the same thing as me and understands what's it like to have hemiplegic Cerebral Palsy have had it since I was born and I'm about to turn 30 and I want to something to change.

What I find really disheartening is that fact people won't come and talk to me about my disability they'll just stand stare and it's Like hello I am a human so unless you have something useful or kind to say off you pop.

I have family I can talk to but they're response is " oh you'll meet someone soon" or " you'll get a boyfriend one day"!

And to me that's of no use I want to change it but I know I can't and that's Incredibly frustrating.

Emily 🤨😐🙄

Rachel_Scope

I'm glad you're not subjected to bullying anymore. I think a lot of people just don't understand how to interact with those who have physical disabilities. I'm sure if they asked though a lot of people would be happy to chat about their condition and break down that barrier.

There's a monthly Online Cafe for those with CP, the next one is on Monday at 4:30. Here are the details. You'll have to register but all the info you need should be there. @Richard_Scope and @SaraC_Scope are the ones in the know and I'm sure they'll want to welcome you when they're back in on Monday 😊 It could be a good start in meeting people who can share similar experiences and understand what you're going through.

What other groups have you tried?

SaraC_Scope

Hi @pooleemily29

I've just read through your thread and can completely relate to your situation. I have right sided hemiplegia and when I was in school and through my 20's, I really struggled with making or keeping friends. School was a nightmare as I was the only child with CP and no other child or teacher understood. I was the victim of a lot of bullying.

Things got easier when I started an apprenticeship at 18 and met new people, but even then there was prejudice from some who thought CP meant being in a wheelchair and what use would I be in their team. A lot of education was shared with that person, especially around being in a wheelchair doesn't mean you can't work.

I have two trusted friends and I did meet my husband who fully accepted everything about me. All I've learnt is you will meet your tribe of people in time but understand in your 20's you want the same experiences as your peers. There is a great Facebook page called Cerebral Palsy Adult Advice where you can connect with others.

CP Teens also offer support to young adults after the age of 25, so it might be worth reaching out to them.

Please remember you're not alone and it would be lovely to see you at the CP Network or the cafe.

Take care

@SaraC_Scope

Richard_Scope

Hi @pooleemily29

Great to meet you! I'm so glad that my colleagues have messaged you too. As has been mentioned, we have the CP Network, this is for adults 18 and older. We get together once a month and have a general chat or guest speakers. We'd love to see you!

Lucy_Scope

Hi @pooleemily29,

Lovely to meet you. As both @Richard_Scope and @SaraC_Scope have mentioned you are not alone, and there are various groups who can support. Making friends as a disabled person can be tricky, due to attitudes and general ableism, and dating is somewhat harder! I'm in my 20s, and my non-disabled friends find the world of dating difficult at the best of times, but being disabled and a woman can be incredibly frustrating due to presumptions.

Take care.