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Hi, my name is Taffy3rd! Girlfriend wants me and my son out of her house, where do I go from here?

Taffy3rd

Hi ,where do I start that a good question,I've moved in with my girlfriend 3 years ago 18 of August last year been living with his mum ,I ask the police for a welfare check on my son , police went to mum house and the police removed him been living like a tramp mould inis hair ingrained dirt all over is body bedroom smell like a dirty toilet,ect,so far got my son clean into school good reports,now my nightmares starting to grow last Christmas my refuse to go to school welfare officer comes around every day to see my son,this went for two months,so we decided to home schooling no joy ,now we got cahms involved plus social services, social services closed our case after 3 meeting,not happy,last month my son been diagnosed with ASD autism spectrum disorder ( what a relief) , applied for DLA for my son will get reply in February next year,more bad news my girlfriend wants me out of the house now ,made plans for my son to stay with sister over Christmas while I'm fixing my car,box all my son stuff ,where do I go from here any help please so heart broken,what it is my girlfriend don't won't two disabled at her home many thanks alan

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Rosie_Scope

Hi @Taffy3rd, welcome to the community. I'm sorry to hear about all you and your son have been through. How old is your son now if you don't mind me asking?

Have you contacted your local council to see if they can put you on the list for housing? It might be a long wait so it won't be helpful right now, but it's worth getting started as soon as you can. The council may also be able to offer some ideas about where you can live with your son while you wait.

Has your girlfriend asked both of you to leave, or just your son? If you think you will be made homeless, Shelter are a great place to get some advice:

Home - Shelter England

I hope you can find a way to sort things soon.

Taffy3rd

My son is 15 years old turn 16 in April

Taffy3rd

Both to leave ,plan so far get my fixed parts coming tomorrow,my son staying in Weymouth over Christmas while I box all my son belongings,also been talking to the bank for appointees for my son bank account need some form DWP if my son gets pip ,

Taffy3rd

We live in ,s,Wales moved from Dorset England,lived in Dorset for 27 years , altogether I've got 5 children twins first time round now 32 years old,got divorced moved to England married a English woman had three more children one girl two boys,my oldest twin got ME,my daughter got MS,now my youngest child got ASD, I'm in good spirits, don't drink don't take drugs ,always have date night every Friday,I'm suffering with sciatica my l5 rubbing on my spine,that was 2 years ago I'm healing very slowly doing yoga stretching exercises,I'm a plasterer/builder,I'm 54 years old ,will answer any questions you got not shy in that department all my best taffy3rd,

Rosie_Scope

Thanks for sharing some more about you @Taffy3rd. Sounds like you've got a big family 😊

Is there anything in particular you need advice about at the moment, or is it mostly about what to do with your housing?

Taffy3rd

Do I need contact social services? Had no reports from from cahms only phone calls pushed for diagnosed nothing on paper ,our housing association called trivallis I've down loaded the app not filled in yet, got appointment with C advice tomorrow hopefully they will help ,

Rosie_Scope

That sounds like a good plan @Taffy3rd, I hope Citizens Advice are helpful tomorrow.

Is your son still under CAMHS care?

It might be worth getting in touch with Social Services again to see if they can help put any more support in place for you both considering your circumstances might be about to change.

Taffy3rd

Still under camhs care my son is on medication called sertraline 50 mg per day from cahms Dr been on them for 3 weeks take up to months for them tablets to work very shy and quiet boy ,

Rosie_Scope

It's good to hear he's still under CAMHS, hopefully they can continue to support him while things stabilise a bit. It can take a while for medications to settle, but I hope he feels the benefit of them soon.

Taffy3rd

Thank you for good advice merry Christmas and happy new year ,ps will keep u dated ,

Rosie_Scope

You too @Taffy3rd, I hope you manage to find some solutions. Please do keep us posted with how you get on.

Aphrodite_Persephone

@Taffy3rd Present as homeless at your local council housing office with your son as he's a minor they have a duty of care to rehouse him and you. Beware though you may be placed into temporary housing for a while, which is better than being on the streets. It's good your son is under CAMHs as they may also be able to help with your council housing application. I'd also contact children services for a needs assessment for both you and your son which will make you a priority for housing. All the best

Taffy3rd

Thank u ,having so much help with scope, trouble with me I think of the worse double it and add bit on ,

WhatThe

Hi Taffy and welcome to Scope

Ask your ex for a letter addressed to the council saying you can't stay there any longer.

Amaya_Ringo

It can be difficult to present as homeless direct to a Council housing team, depending on what your LA does. There may be a specific day they are available for dropins or they might do most of their communications over the phone or require you to contact them that way ahead of time.

In our area the first port of call for a lot of people is the local library because the Council run weekly dropins there and there are also other advisory teams that come in to give advice to people in situations like yours. Our library also has a freephone set up for council services including housing and homelessness concerns, but the Council housing staff are only around in person for face to face meetings one day a week.

It might be worth doing some checking first (maybe the Citizens Advice can help) about what your local Council does re housing.

Taffy3rd

Updates on my situation my son still in Dorset also had a hair cut hooray,still taking is medication bonus,I'm on the housing association on home finder in the RCT,I've bid for three flats so far every Thursday,I've had a very quiet Christmas, fighting between my heart and my head like world war three over thinking,my moving date getting closer 9th of January,most of our clothes are boxed up ,we are going into one room bed and breakfast, getting worried about son autism spectrum disorder,got meeting on the 6th of January with home finder ,plus I'm in pain with sciatica lov taffy3rd,