I don't see any way out but suicide.

Aella

I'm a partially sighted stroke and cancer patient. Struggled through MRs and appeals, always win a short award and have to go through it again just a couple of years later. Rack up debts during the appeal. But I thought I'd be OK for a short time now.

However now the government is almost certainly drastically cutting disability benefits to the point it won't be enough to survive on. I can't walk properly or dress myself due to the stroke, I'm adjusting to losing a large amount of vision, and I'm very tired and brain foggy from cancer treatment. I cannot go back to work. During appeals I rely on food banks but the local ones are awful. They only give things like tea, coffee, milk, sugar, cookies and tiny bags of pasta. Nothing you can actually live on. I developed major nutritional deficiencies and the NHS just prescribes me supplements. No help getting real food. With these big disability cuts, I'd have to live like that permanently.

There is truly no way out for me but suicide. However due to my disabilities, it's difficult. I already tried and failed once. Why can't they just legalise assisted suicide instead of starving us to death?

Rosie_Scope

Hi @Aella, we've popped you a message so please look out for that. It's not an easy time at all and I can totally understand your worries after what you've experienced. It's awful that you got nutritional deficiencies from using the food banks, that can't have helped with your conditions at all and I'm really sorry you had to deal with that with so little support from your GP.

We should be learning more about what's happening today and once we know, we'll be able to start the fight back against anything that will be harmful to disabled people.

Is anyone at home with you today? Or is there anybody you could call up for a chat to talk things through? We'll be here too, and you definitely won't be alone in what you're feeling. 💙

Aella

Yes, i got the message thanks. I've tried most of those help places and they're useless. Places like the samaritans and sane just give platitudes. Macmillan give a £300 grant once every two years which isn't enough to make any difference and have been useless apart from that.

I've had 5 mental health therapies on the NHS. They were all worse than useless. They just tell me to write lists of why I shouldn't feel bad and look at it when I feel down, or write timetables for myself to get into a helpful routine. I asked my last therapist for EDMR and she refused, saying that because I'm still in the situation that's causing my distress, it will make matters worse. She said I should take up art to make myself feel better. Totally useless.

The simple fact is, my problems are financial. I could live with the pain and disability, but I cannot keep on with the constant threat of homelessness, hunger, always having to fight and struggle for whatever scraps of help are out there. No amount if therapy would fix this, even if it was good therapy.

If they are cutting UC by £400 a month and cutting PIP, I'm done for. No more.

sara50

Has anyone else heard or read that we are getting a cost of living payment in april for 250 pounds and then a couple of weeks later we are getting 500 pounds for food and heat does anykne know if this is true

Naz4

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1000350#Comment_1000350

Hi Aella I know it's easy to say but things aren't happening overnight. Try to accept any help Scope and others suggest.

Ranald

noonebelieves

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/131295/i-dont-see-any-way-out-but-suicide

@Aella , I’m truly saddened to hear what you’re going through. This is an incredibly tough time, but please know that you are not alone, and there is hope. I know how difficult financial struggles can be, and my heart goes out to you. Please hang in there-your life is so valuable, even if it may not feel that way right now. We are all standing by you and sending you strength during this challenging time.Please also follow message from @Rosie_Scope - I hope it helps you get the medical attention and support you deserve. Take care, dear. ❤️

mawempathy

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/131295/i-dont-see-any-way-out-but-suicide

I'm really sorry to hear you feeling so hopeless and low. I've been thinking a lot lately about right-to-die, and I would like the option to have a compassionate exit if I'm too much of a burden to support. I would love my family to be there with me, having discussed and explain the reasons behind my choice, and reassured them there's nothing they can do to change my mind, and remind them we will be reunited again one day in heaven. It's a much more humane way to go, and doesn't leave your family full of questions and guilt… but I never expect the political class to care or understand that.

Anyway, moving on from that dark stuff….

Nothing is changing for more than a year. There are going to be pretty robust debates about these proposals in both houses. There will be legal fights once the details are fully fleshed out, and the likes of Scope are going to be fighting for us. I think when politicians are educated that what is proposed will condemn millions of people to the streets, because loss of PIP and LCWRA will be absolutely catastrophic, they will have to drive through massive changes.

So please try and get any immediate thoughts of harming yourself out your head. There's a long, long way to go before any of this stuff becomes reality. This community will be with you every step of the way, so you're not alone, we're all in this together, and hopefully some light at the end of the tunnel will emerge before too long.