I have Aspergers, and will be homeless in seven weeks. Help me please.
Hi,
I'm sorry if this is a bit all over the place, but I'm really struggling and just need to talk to someone who gets it.
I'm autistic and live in Northern Ireland. My landlord has basically said I need to leave by the end of July. He mentioned Radius housing and even called them on my behalf, but nothing is certain. I donโt have a tenancy offer or viewing yet, and Reddit posts have completely freaked me out, saying Iโll just end up in a hostel. Iโm terrified of that.
I already gave NIHE proof of my PIP award back in January. Iโm not sure if that helps or if they even look at it. I tried to speak to the Housing Executive, but they said nothing can really happen until 28 days before homelessness, which feels too late. They mentioned points, but again, it's all vague and I donโt feel seen.
Iโve been trying to get a letter from my GP, but itโs hard to get through. I went down in person and they told me to call in the morning to get a doctor to ring me. That line is always jammed. I asked about a social worker too โ they said one will call me, but not until next Monday (todayโs only Tuesday).
To make things harder, I have a cat, Basil, who is everything to me. Heโs 100% my emotional support and Iโm scared Iโll have to give him up if I get put in a hostel or temporary housing. Itโs heartbreaking. Iโve had him for years and I donโt know how to face losing him.
My girlfriend is supportive in her own way, but Iโm overwhelmed. I feel like I'm being bounced between systems that arenโt designed for autistic people. Everything feels like a fight. Everyone keeps saying โitโll be fineโ or โthink positive,โ but that doesnโt change anything when I feel like Iโm hanging on by a thread.
Has anyone else been through something like this?
What actually helped you push through?
Does getting a GP letter or social worker actually change anything with housing?
Thank you for reading. I feel lost.
Comments
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@Liam9529 I'm so very sorry you're going through all this. Please do keep trying to get through to your GP to get support/a letter. I'm sorry I don't have any exact advice. Hopefully the social worker on Monday will be able to help you. I would be absolutely adamant that your cat Basil HAS to stay with you.
I moved to a council bungalow in 2022 I'd been on the list 3 years so was very lucky. I was told I could only take a maximum of two dogs (I've got 4), 3 shih tzus who are brother and sisters and a yorkie who is the 'brother in law'. I was adamant from the start they're not going anywhere apart from with me and I wrote a detailed explanation of why and details about each of them. I'm sure the council officer felt they were losing the will to live reading it and they gave in.
I won't get more pets as and when I lose them (because of poor health and finances) but you need your little Basil and, like you say, he's your emotional support so he's non-negotiable.
I don't like it when people go on about being positive as we have to be realistic too, well, I do, and have to consuder all possible scenarios and what I'd do.
It must be a very scary and is an uncertain time for you. I'd say keep strong, be strong in your dealings with your GP and social worker and mostly, be very clear Basil is a part of your life and you need him with you, especially to be able to cope in your life and to protect your mental health.
I do wish you all the best and hopefully, others with more experience will come along to advise. Take very good care ๐ซ.
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Thank you so much for your reply. Yes, it sounds like you also got sorted which is great, our furry friends need us, as much as we need them. I'm seeing a mental health specalist today, and I will tell them how I'm feeling. I don't want to be in a hostel. I know others can do it, but I just can't. I know me and I know how I react. I'll keep at it for sure, and will keep this thread updated as and when I know more.
Liam.
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I have a family member went through same definition of disability from a social worker or gp helps with housing as it shows priority need etc so do get those things xx good luck thourghts are with you
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I've been in a similar position. Homeless services aren't very accessible and it is a fight. Toxic positivity like you've been hearing from services isn't helpful. Sorry you're dealing with this.
Regarding your GP, do they have an online consultation feature? If so, use that to ask them for a letter. If they don't, turn up in person with someone who can help advocate for you. They should accommodate your needs, as not doing so, goes against equality law (at least it does in the rest of the UK, you'll need to check NI).
The points you're referring to likely refer to your local council's social housing portal, and how they allocate priority for applicants. You will need to ask your council for more information about that, as each council's policies are different.
The NI Housing Executive's claims they aren't really able to help until at least 28 days beforehand is correct.
If you do need temporary accommodation, the council will try to avoid hostels (or at least sharing with other people), but this is not a guarantee. if they do put you in a hostel, they will aim to move you as soon as possible.
Sadly, the Reddit posts you saw regarding hostels are a likely possibility. sometimes hostels are literally are all the council have to house people, and they won't know till the day. You will mentally need to prepare for the possibility of having to go into hostels temporarily.
The council will be swamped with homelessness cases. They will try to delay helping people as long as possible, and focus on those with the greatest needs (ie. disabled people, families, asylum seekers etc.).
Also, you need to look for a housing charity in NI that can provide legal advice and caseworker support. In the rest of the UK, we have Shelter, but they don't operate in NI.
NI housing law is different to the rest of the UK thanks to devolution, so you need specific advice and support from an NI based org. having a caseworker makes all the difference in my experience Look for housing charities in the Republic of Ireland and ask them to signpost you to NI orgs. Or ask the NI Housing Executive.
Regarding Basil, If you explain all of your circumstances to the council, they will try - keyword, try - to keep you both together. If you and your cat do need separating, do you have anyone who can look after him? like your girlfriend? emotional support animals aren't recognised under UK law in any region, so that would be your best option.
best of luck.
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No, I have nobody who can take him. I went to see the housing this morning, and they said they'd take any reports from my social worker and take into consideration, They said there's two openings in the fold. A supported living complex with flats, and that not many want to go in, so I may have a good shot. I'm talking to a mental health specialist today, to see what they can do. I am dreading the thought of going into a shelter. Or hostel. I'll end up a drug addict or something.
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The very, very best of luck to you @Liam9529, sounds like you've had a busy morning! I'm keeping everything possible crossed for you ๐.
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Thank you! So I'm just back. She's gonna talk to social worker and see what they can do. I explained my trauma and my fears etc.
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So social worker called me back. She's gonna call my housing officer. She told me to email him about something called a performa. With no guarantee. I've had enough. I can't handle being fobbed off time and time again. The woman I spoke to at 2 was so kind to me but ultimately it's lead to nothing. It was a giant waste of time. I don't know what a performa is, I don't know what that means for me and being housed and I'm going to lose everything I hold dear to me and it's not even my fault. I'm going tomorrow to print a photo of basil and put it in my wallet so that when I'm in a hostel crying I'll see my boy.
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It sounds like it's been a very difficult day for you @Liam9529, I know it's easy for me to say but please don't feel panicked at this stage. If you can speak to the social worker to ask what exactly she means about the performa and who you've got to email as I don't know what that means I'm sorry.
You've also hopefully going to ask GP for a letter of support.
I think the 28 days you mentioned in your earlier post is normal, I've heard of that before and whilst that doesn't help you in planning/knowing exactly what will happen right now and in advance as much as you'd want, I would still keep in touch with the social worker and Housing. Especially about the supported living complex with flats.
Is it even worth asking your current landlord for a letter of support.
Don't forget, no matter how many people they are helping - your priority has to be you (and Basil) and if that means gathering as much support as you possibly can (letter off GP/copy of your PIP information - giving it to them again if you have to, social worker support) and keeping 'on top' of them all, each day/every few days, but at the very least, understanding what they're asking for I hope for you that that will bring a suitable place for you in the coming weeks.
Please do come on here as much as you need to, it can help especially if you're feeling a bit lost or low. Thinking of you and I'm hoping tomorrow you might get some clarity on what the social worker is talking about.
It was very slow moving for me when I needed to move/get allocated a suitable place and it all happened in a period of just three weeks. Keep strong and keep hope too. Sending very warmest wishes and hugs to you Liam.
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I'll call tomorrow at noon to find out. And I mispelled it, Its Porforma, I have no idea what it all means. I wish I could just wish this all away.
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Hi @Liam9529 - it's a 'pro forma' - 'for the sake of form,' which just means it's usually a statement/document that's needed as a 'formality.' I don't know why people don't explain things properly.
Please stay strong, I've been reading about you & Basil, & wish you both well. Hopefully today is a better day. I have a cat called Shadow, & I know how much she means to me as she's recovering from recent surgery.
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Will it help me? Thank you so much. I'm so axay
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Scared I meant!
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Social Worker called me back. Confirmed they're not my personal social worker, but they put in a urgent application with First Housing. And will contact my housing officer. I panicked and went down there, my housing officer will be contacting my GP. I hope I haven't fucked up anything. I'm so scared.
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You haven't messed anything up, these actions are good it means your needs are being properly assessed, as they should be.
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True. This is a nightmare. I can't cope.
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Update: likely will have to go into a hostel or single let. I'll have to figure out what to do with basil. This is going to kill me.
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Hi I've just read your posts I'm so this is extremely stressful for you these are good organisations maybe they could help
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@Liam9529 I've not heard of a 'Single Let'; I'm suspecting though you could have Basil with you in that. I'm still keeping everything crossed for you Liam, it's early days in the scheme of things (not for you I understand that), but in how they work/process it etc.
Do you have any family/support (apart from your girlfriend). If you need any help in contacting hostels to check which might support your Basil coming too, please ask me and I can help you make calls (via 'phone as I can't travel). Take care Liam, every day I'll hope this might be the day for good news for you ๐.
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Thank you for your kindness..I'm almost without support other than my girlfriend. And I get the vibe I'm depressing her. A single let I think is just a one bedroom flat that they give you when you have nowhere else. I may see if I can take my basil. The ladies in the pet shop said they may know someone who can foster him for three months if needs be. My landlord got mad at me because I've let the house go to ruin due to executive dysfunction. He said he should by rights give me seven days but he knew I was good to my dying mother. I want to be with her sometimes.
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