Struggling really, it’s the anniversary of my mum passing away today

ClaireS

hi,

really struggling, it’s been a year since my mum passed away, my mum passed away suddenly. My dad passed away in 2021 but it was a longer process with him, about 6 weeks, but with my mum it basically happened in the space of 3 or 4 days I can’t really remember how long but it felt like overnight my world changed.

Struggling with a lot of thoughts and feelings and don’t really know what to do.

Bluebell21

Hi @ClaireS I am sorry for your loss. Grief can be overwhelming. Perhaps try and remember the good times you shared together. I always light a candle on the anniversary of the death of my loved ones.

https://www.cruse.org.uk

Take care of yourself.

ClaireS

Thank you so much for your reply.

luvpink

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1048440#Comment_1048440

Hi lovely

I lost my beautiful mum 17 years ago.

For me the pain has never gone away but its got a bit easier over time.

I light candles and buy flowers on anniversaries and I have comfort knowing we had great times together and that I was blessed with the best. X

Legwax

Dear @ClaireS I am sorry about your loss of your mum so suddenly last year. I'm also sorry your dad passed away a few years ago. What a tough time. If you think speaking to someone today would help, the Samaritans are good listeners or you can offload in an email to them though that is not as immediate as a phone call. They listen supportively and are happy to do so to anyone struggling. You don't have to be suicidal. https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/

It can be hard looking after yourself if feeling low but unless you have someone to look out for you, maybe making an appointment to speak to or see your GP might help. They might be able to put you in touch with a local support person or worker or service.

If that all sounds too much right now, I wish you an easier day and rest if you want it. Best wishes.

Legwax

P.s. That "Contact Us" is only a link to the contact page on the Samaritans site. It is not a direct video call button or anything like that! After I copy and pasted it, it shrank (formatted/whatever) to that. Looks a bit alarming I think.

Rosie_Scope

That sounds really tough @ClaireS, I know grief is not a predictable thing but I hope things start feeling easier to bear soon.

Some of our members have already posted some lovely support resources to check out. I'll just add that there's SHOUT too. It's a texting service so you don't have to speak on the phone if you're not feeling up to it: Shout 85258

The Good Grief Trust have some resources too: Home – The Good Grief Trust

Please take it really easy and look after yourself 💛

ClaireS

thank you for all your responses, sorry for the late response yesterday floored me and I’m struggling so much mentally, I feel so overwhelmed and anxious

Wheeled_Weapon

I guess I have nothing much to add other than to send you strength and love.

I feel awkward giving 'advice' on this, so I apologise if I get this wrong but try and concentrate on all the happy times you had together rather than the end.

Take care x