help. had a bad experience at dentist
Hi, I had a planned dental appointment today to replace a filling. I have multiple disabilities both physical and mental, including severe chronic pain. I am on several medications but just for pain I take Codiene, Morphine and Gabapentin. I have spasms too which is what this post is about. I am a pretty recent patient in my dental surgery and made them aware of my needs. Anyway back to today. My dental nurse called me in 15 minutes late and my dentist already looked annoyed. I greeted her politely which she ignored and she asked me if I wanted to be numbed for the removal of the old filling and the replacement. I said yes please. She laid the chair back and started to look inside my mouth. Unfortunately I had a spasm. I DID NOT touch her. She got very angry. I said "sorry, I did say I have spasms but should be ok now as it`s passed" she gave me a really dirty look and made me feel awful. She then said "I don`t feel comfortable treating you!" I asked her why and she just looked me up and down and told me to leave! I said "pardon?" she said "I`m not treating you" then turned her chair away so she wasn`t facing me. Surely this is discrimination? (also to add this was to replace an old silver filling with a new silver filling and she was annoyed last appointment that I said I couldn`t afford a white filling) I am so upset and have been crying all afternoon over it. My teeth are bad due to neglect as a child and illness so I have needed a bit of treatment and couldn`t find a NHS dentist. I am so humiliated. I am so fed up with being treated like scum. What should I do? My husband is looking to taking it further but I am scared . Disabled people get so poorly treated I don`t want to live like this. It isn`t my fault. I did not touch her or knock her I just had a back spasm due to lying flat which is very painful. Any advice welcome but please be nice I am feeling very mentally fragile
Comments
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I'm really sorry you've experienced this, what awful dentist! I had a bad experience with a dentist once myself.
You should put in a complaint. Explain everything you have done here.
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Hi @QueenRainbow and a warm welcome to the community from me!
I'm so sorry to hear about this, it sounds like a very stressful and overwhelming situation. As Ross said above, it definitely sounds like should put a complaint in because it sounds like you were treated unfairly.2 -
On the other side of the scale the dentist may of felt they could not carry on in a safe manner for them or yourself
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there`s a right way to go about that though. Not the way she behaved which was very rude.
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I cannot see how taking the dentists side and being dismissive towards the patient like how you have is warranted, even if the dentist did genuinely think the patient was being inappropriate, then it's just down to a misunderstanding, but after the patient apologising and saying that it was a spasm I think the dentist should still give the patient the benefit of the doubt instead of being so rude towards them as they have absolutely no proof that the patient was purposely being inappropriate, and from what the patient is saying the dentist just genuinely doesn't seem like a nice person anyway. It is actually the dentist here who is inappropriate, not the patient.
Situations like this is why disability training for healthcare staff is so important.
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How awful, I'm so sorry you experienced this. If you complain it's to NHS England for NHS patients but for private it's the Dental Complaints Service who are on 020 8253 0800 (Mon to Fri 9am to 5pm).
I would definitely be looking for an alternative dentist asap but particularly because you've not had the treatment yet. I would not, myself, ever be giving somebody a 'second chance' who treated me so appallingly and so rudely, there's no excuse. You deserve better. Please don't be fearful. I hope you can rest today/this evening and are not in pain with your teeth. Sending very warmest wishes to you.
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We have one side of the story there is always two I was making that point nothing more or less if you want to make something of my reply you carry on
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Would a different position help do you think?
Your local hospital might offer a dental service whereby you are sedated for treatment - is that something you'd be comfortable with?
It's not as important as teeth but I had to give up pedicures, even without the "cheese grater" I began to not trust my muscles (after one occasion where something almost happened) and didn't think it was fair on the beautician.
I've settled for having my toes painted & nails cared for, and using a very good foot cream.
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Not sure why you're becoming so defensive, michael.
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That sounds awful @QueenRainbow!! I'm going to say similar to michael that the dentist probably felt that they couldn't do the treatment safely and they shouldn't continue if that's the case, which is reasonable
BUT if she was rude there's never a need for rudeness or rude behaviour! Was the dental nurse in there too? Did they say anything?? I'd maybe ask for a written explanation as to why they wouldn't or couldn't treat you ❤️
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it was the rudeness. It wasn`t even a big spasm. She was annoyed from the off. The dental assistant actually looked gobsmacked so I wasn`t being too sensitive
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I only have to imagine what other things the assistant has witnessed with that dentist.
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There was no need to make you feel like that. Make a complaint. Ask to see a different dentists. You did nothing to justify such behavour. A victim of a nasty dentist is all. Bless you.
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I’d ask for a longer appointment and tell them exactly what you need before any work starts
I’ve found it helps to request pauses and keep someone with me in the room
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I'm so sorry you were treated so horribly and made to feel so lowly. You've come to the right place for support, as you see from the above posts. I have muscle spasms too as well as anxiety that can cause panic attacks. The muscle spasms can get triggered by the position of the dentist's chair and my anxiety gets triggered by the dental treatment as well as being trapped between the staff in my face and the chair. So I take a Valium about 15 min before the treatment, which is an effective muscle relaxant as well as an effective anxiety treatment. It's a cheap medicine and a quick, easy treatment. Is that something you've considered or could consider?
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I feel your pain, the Dental Nurse where I used to go was pure evil.
Nowadays, they're a LOT nicer, and prettier lol.
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