Not coping about care needs process + extra medical issue

brushcolours

Hello
I always feel so bad posting, even though is rare, as know everyone's going through stuff, but feeling risk of losing mind. Hard to summarize too. Takes me many hours of editing, as dealing with dissociation in form of intrusive violation I feel physically, since early 2000s, along with abusive 'voice' about everything, and now also actual issue down below which physically feels violating. Sad to realise today that ending up with a clearly written message maybe comes over as if am okay/managing, but it's the opposite.

For context, had to contact sheltered housing warden when first felt risk about mind. Nearly 60, very disabled, totally isolated long-term [historical abuses], horrible dissociation, and not been able to shower/clean/use washer etc for long time. Care needs assessment suggested.

In 3 weeks since that was done, temporary trainee SW was great in stopping gp remove me from practice unless have blood test, but nothing else is happening, except trying to push me to deal with full house declutter and clean in one go, over a few days, which is impossible, no matter how much I would love the house to be tidy/clean again. I'd said could only begin to manage if days were spaced out, but reply was that clearing team are busy and could affect others getting appointments. Yet breaking up visits I'm thinking would take the same amount of time. Apologized but said must postpone. Haven't heard back. Had been OT involvement mentioned at start also, but then unfortunately nothing else has been said.

Had also been told needs can't be assessed until after decluttering, including extra care accommodation, which is only thing I think would help dissocation also, through being able to start to mix again + 'bedsit'. Trainee social worker said she was leaving in 3 weeks, which is up today. Maybe the new SW would understand, but is worryingly random.

Very difficult dealing with the system again. but had to call gp this week, about horrendous issue down below which feels violating so badly am hardly able to lie down and get sleep. Over the phone gp treating it as possible prolapse sign. Today delivery of Scheriproct cream and Lactulose softener drink: done dose of both, but no change yet. Literally at screaming point when lie down [know both neighbours very deaf].

Desperate for a tilted chair with headrest I can sleep in, as only relief is when sit. Last week had seen someone here mention tiltable powerchair, which I'd looked up and really liked, plus crutches very difficult/some arm pain starting. Wish could wave a wand and powerchair appear. Am so desperate to sleep; feel must act before potentially mind 'go'. Would feel bad about chair company dealing with house/me, no matter how hard I've tried over time to tidy both, but all can do is explain and be thankful for any understanding. Although I read that too much sitting can be unhelpful about a potential prolapse, lying down and walking are very challenging, and lack of sleep is straining mind too much, so am thinking protecting sleep and mind must come 1st. Saw online to do pelvic 'clenching' too, which am doing, but can't curl body.

Was sent email that home visit for blood test will be tomorrow, along with blood pressure, plus will examine my lower area. Nurses coming to house, which am grateful for, but am really shattered/emotional right now. I can hardly move/stand, and, again, don't think they will expect how me/house are, which feels bad. Very stressed will need to lie down (can't do without cry/scream), and twist over so they can examine. I said to gp on phone that need to request assistance.

Does anyone have any tips about things could do about possible prolapse when can't move much? And any advocacy or options up north (middlesbrough) or online that people have experienced are good? Utterly worn out, and would be grateful for any advice.

brushcolours

Just to update it wasn't a prolapse, but still severe sensitivity. Need to talk with gp after 7 days of doing treatment. Otherwise, would really value any advice about advocacy/options up north or online, to help with care needs process.

PS had seen others labelling triggers, and post held back then allowed, so am understanding haven't goofed up, but writing 'possibly triggering' I'm thinking may work better. Couldn't edit.

Mary_Scope

Hi @brushcolours

Please don't feed bad for posting, you are always welcome here on the community! I

It sounds like you are dealing with a lot at the moment so it's very understandable why you're feeling shattered and emotional.

How are you feeling today after the appointment? I hope the treatment starts to work soon and you're in a bit less pain.

According to Advocacy services by Middlesbrough Council, it looks like you can refer yourself to People First if you live in Middlesborough and this is the referral form.

There is also POhWER and VoiceAbility which are both advocacy organisations that I hope will be helpful.

brushcolours

Hi @Mary_Scope

Thank you very much for your helpful post. Really appreciate.

Overall, although blood tests initiated via threat of removal from practice, actual experience of medical staff on the ground has been a relief am not used to. Am aware things may shift, if different medicines are introduced (don't do well with especially opiates) … so tired out, will need to deal with that part when it happens.

Regarding the care needs process, am stunned. No contact for an entire week is the latest thing, so nothing has been done in almost 4 weeks since assessed, and theoretically the trainee SW may no longer be there. Thus your links are a very big help. I've bookmarked them and read a bit about each. A Care Act advocate sounds like what to enquire further about, and I'd be very grateful for that.

A couple of issues … e.g. I'm on a Linux pc, as a very non-tech (artist) user, and the POhWer form is only in docx format, so I would need to find what will convert the file to text. VoiceAbility ends on that referral is via a social care professional, yet that's where I'm having issues and need advocacy in trying to work with them. People First includes help with if care needs assessment hasn't gone well, but references complaints/appeals, which I really hope to not get to.

Some good clear information on each site, and will read further later, try to get more sleep, and try one further communication with the tempSW.

Really appreciate your advice. Have a good day.

Thanks, Cat