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We want to hear from you: please tell us about your experience of the online community.

Hey guys, I just feel like I want to get something off my chest.

kelics

Recently I discovered something about myself, something isn't very nice but it is what it is.

I've been single for almost 10 years. I thought I don't need anyone, I'm happy on my own blah blah. But I think in reality, I'm a very lonely man.

Because of my disability, I kinda put a gravestone on that part and haven't even considered dating.

But now my heart is open and I'm ready for it.

I'm willing to do whatever it takes just to escape that feeling of loneliness.

Obviously I'm not here to look for a date, but I appreciate any advice u can give me in regards to this subject because I think finding someone especially if u have a disability can be extremely difficult and im sure some people on this page r wearing the same shoes.

Should i pay for dating sites? Should i look for someone in the same boat as me?(with a disability)? Should i go out and socialise more often.

I really fed up of being alone, that also affects my mental health. There is not doubt in my mind that there is someone out there. I just need to go in the right direction! Really appreciatte any advice u can give me!!

Love and peace ❤️✌🏻.

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Comments

Kimi87

If you read through this section (Relationships), the subject has come up many times with lots of advice given.

I've given up with the apps myself, but I would still recommend socialising more often as a starting point. This will get you out & about more meeting people face to face, improve your mental health (the apps can be brutal) build up confidence, then give the apps a go if you so wish.

Rosie_Scope

Hi @kelics, loneliness can be a really tough thing to live with, but it's good that you've recognised how it's affecting you. There are a few different dating website and apps for people with disabilities, so those might be worth a try if you're interested to meet someone who understands what it's like to be disabled. But as Kimi87 mentions, sometimes just getting more social can open up possibilities.

Even if you don't meet anyone for romantic means immediately, you could meet some new friends which might help you feel a little less alone in general.

Do you have any hobbies or interests? It can be nice to join groups where you already have a common interest to start from, or something where you're doing an activity. I found it makes it a lot easier to get to know people as you've already got a starting point for conversations.

kelics

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1119070#Comment_1119070

Thank u so much!

kelics

Ur probably rite. Althought, i kno many people who met ondating sites and got married.

kelics

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1119098#Comment_1119098

Yes i agree! Ill look for these groups! Ty!!

MissMarple

If you are able to go out to, I would stay away from dating apps. It can be soul-destroying. Yes, people met through dating apps, but I think that was a more viable option in the past. Currently the apps are full of scammers, time wasters or totally unhinged individuals. In real life you can instantly see each other, interact and assess the general vibe of the other person.

There are plenty of hobby and social groups out there, it may just need a bit of research to find them. Your local library, community centre, college/university could be a good starting point. U3A if you are older. Even if you are not. My local church hosts a choir. It's just the venue, no one cares about your religious affiliation.

I would just go out and try all kinds of groups and activities. You never know who you'll meet. Making friends is great to fight loneliness and they can introduce you to more people. I used to go to Cafe Scientifique events where there were interesting talks and an opportunity to socialise after. The weather is improving. It's a great time to explore your local area or venture out a bit farther.