Why is it hard being disabled to find love?

madchris55
madchris55 Community Member Posts: 73 Contributor
edited June 16 in Relationships

Why is it that people look at disabled people as if we're a burden? I've been single now for 11 years and not one date in that entire time. I've talked to countless people but as soon as they realise my problem they stop talking. I just don't get why people are like that these days. I just find this world so sad and there's not enough done for us disabled people to help us feel like we're normal. We have to fight for everything and why is love the hardest one to get?

Comments

  • SheffieldMan1976
    SheffieldMan1976 Posts: 2,891 Connected

    Ableism should, but never will, be illegal IMO.

    Prejudice created by complete morons who need to touch grass.

  • Rachel_Scope
    Rachel_Scope Posts: 4,198 Online Community Team

    I'm sorry you're struggling to find love @madchris55. It's incredibly unfair and I wish the world were different. Have you tried any disability-focused dating apps?

  • SheffieldMan1976
    SheffieldMan1976 Posts: 2,891 Connected
    https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1132349#Comment_1132349

    Most dating sites in general are a scam IMO, £20 for 200 credits, and it costs 20 credits a time to even talk to anyone? Are you avin' a laugh?!

  • ChrisR777
    ChrisR777 Community Member Posts: 1,338 Trailblazing

    I heard only today that a female cousin is getting married, less than 2 years after a divorce. She was a good looking woman the last time I saw her, and not disabled. Some of us have bigger obstacles to overcome I suppose.

    I have been divorced 16 years, and I expect that to remain the case.

    I find most people are quite considerate, out and about; opening doors for my wheelchair, asking if I need any help, that was the case today when I went to my new dentist (A long sought for NHS dentist), but i can't imagine them thinking of me in any other way. Unless one is pretty striking, is it likely any of us could find romance in everyday situations? I doubt my fat face and cheap clothing set anyone's heart racing!

  • Holly_Scope
    Holly_Scope Posts: 6,249 Online Community Team

    Sorry to hear it's been so tough @madchris55, the dating scene can be brutal. Are you using sites?

  • rubin16
    rubin16 Scope Member Posts: 1,582 Championing

    Probably because everyone has bigger worries in life at the moment than "finding love". Also being disabled is a burden, you're lying to yourself if you think otherwise and while its not impossible to find love being disabled its certainly is much harder.

    Also dating sites are pretty much a scam, full of bots/AI and they charge you a fortune to be a member.

    If your going to find someone it'll just happen. but putting yourself out there on dating sites and other forums your either going to get scammed or defrauded.

  • Holly_Scope
    Holly_Scope Posts: 6,249 Online Community Team

    Although there are very much costly sites and bots etc, it's not all bad. I know quite a few people that have had success on dating sites - several now happily married. But it can be a tough old place too. One of my friends had lots of set backs before finding the right person. I can totally see why it's so deflating.

    I'm similar to you @rubin16 in that it'll fall into place at the right time, but it's difficult when you want to find someone and so you got to do what works for you. 😊

  • egiste2r
    egiste2r Posts: 148 Connected
    https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1132510#Comment_1132510

    Dating sites aren't necessarily a complete scam. But it's certainly easier to meet people offline.

  • Tabitha31
    Tabitha31 Community Member Posts: 16 Listener

    I have try disability apps and it is still so hard and difficult to find someone to date

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