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Behavioral issues in adults

EmmaP94

Hi Everyone,

My name is Emma. I'm 22 years old and live in Hampshire. I have quadriplegic CP and registered blind and rely on full time care.

Throughout my childhood and during the early stages of adulthood I have encountered several occasions where I come across rude towards carers, LSA's and teacher. At first I thought it was a chiildhood/teenage faze and I would grow out of it but as I've got older, the problem still occurs. I then put it down to the fact you can't get on with all staff when in residential care and then using an agency and hoped once i hire my own carers i will get on with them and i wouldn't face anyy more confrontation.

However more recently, i'm still finding it difficult to manage my frustration and am getting more and more angry over the smallest things and I'm being told by a majority of carers that i'm rude and more of them don't want to work for me. I'm not denying it, but I don't aim to do it on purpose either. I'm very intelligent, determined and aim to be as independent as possible. I've tried various ways to deal with it and control it but things are still not improving. I've recently graduated from university and beginning to seek full time employment, but without the support of carers I cannot live the life I choose.

Has anyone else experienced the same problem? Can it be related to CP? Has anyone got help to resolve this? I'm going to my GP next week to see if they can suggest any help or advice.

Any info or advice will be appreciated!

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Comments

Sam_Alumni

Hi @EmmaP94

Welcome to the community and thanks for your courageous and honest post, it is hard to admit when we are struggling but it is always the first step in seeking support.

Frustration and anger are normal emotions but if you feel they are affecting your life then it is important to try and deal with how you are feeling.

I think it is really positive that you are going to see your GP, I hope they can offer some help. I hope you can get involved with this community and talk to other people who can understand where you're coming from.

Sam

gingermusic

Hi Emma I have no idea if this could be related to your illness but my son who is now aged 47 yrs old was diagnosed as suffering with ADHD which causes him to be quite bad tempered and angry at times but he is now on medication which helps a lot. Hope this helps

CathyInSouthAfrica

Hi Emma,

It is true that you should always find out is there is a medical cause for your problems, and get a professional solution for them first.

I am 51, I have fairly mild CP. I was at a school for the disabled until 11. Then I was sent to a normal boarding school, without any preparation. I discovered just how difficult it is to get on with people! Although most people really went out of their way to accommodate me, I had no social skills, and found it really hard to deal with being teased or even admitting (or even knowing myself) what my problems were. I didn't even know exhaustion was a common CP symptom, so I just let myself and others believe I was lazy, or entitled to special treatment. My point is, knowledge is power, and when you understand what is going on inside you it is much easier to cope.

I love your post because of your self awareness, and that is a really empowered place to be.

I have come across some people who were impossible to get on with, but I started doing some courses, for personal development and success, and gained a lot of insight on how people think or don't think, ;-) and on how some of my feelings were normal, and where I could change. I love the Serenity prayer: Grant me the courage to change the things I can, the serenity to accept the things I can't and the wisdom to know the difference. There are tons of courses around, but I can recommend 2 of my favourites: the youtube channel School of Life, and http://www.prhengland.co.uk

I admire you looking for solutions! Keep going with gratitude and compassion for yourself and others, always look for answers, and you will learn how to get the best from yourself and the wonderful people who do so much to help us.

Sam_Alumni

How are you getting on @EmmaP94 did you see your GP?

forgoodnesssake

Hi, I think there defintely can be a link between emotions and CP for some people. It can be that they get angry, or upset more easily or that they react more "dramatically" than might be expected. This is an area that seems to be very under-researched but I know quite a few people (inc. my son) with athetoid CP (but it could apply to other CPs) who can struggle a bit with managing emotions. There is a suggestion that it may be, at least in part, due to the actual parts of the brain that are damaged (cos that's what CP is) either being or being very close to , important emotion areas of the brain. I know that CBT has helped some people