How do you feel about "NORMAL" people?

JGM

Dose it make you angry that other people were born normal but you were born with a disability?I used to go to a facility for "Care In The Community" mental patients,a law student volunteered to work there one summer,she was in a wheel chair,she was born a cripple,I saw an idiot in a wheel chair on telly a couple of days ago,he was born normal,but he was doing stupid stunts on a B.M.X. bike like you see on You've Been Framed and he crippled himself,he's got no one but himself to blame,but,Amy, was born a cripple,I asked her if she felt bitter other people could walk and she couldn't,'t,she said she thought walking was "over rated", she was quite happy in her wheelchair,I feel angry,I hate life,I hate being I'll,and people hate me,everybody who has a job hates people on benefit,they resent paying tax,The Daily Mail tells them we're all fairing it because benefits are so generous you're better off not working and the brain dead scum who read The Daily Mail believe this,it's especially easy to belive those of us with mental illnesses ate fakeing it as we look so normal,everybody thinks I'm scum because they all read The Daily Mail and believe that crasp they write.The owner of The Daily Mail is a millionair,millionairs want people to hate the disabled so we'll abolish the N.H.S. and the Welfare State so they can all have massive tax cuts to spend on super yachets and Zonda ZX sports cars.I hate rich people,I wish the Soviet Union had won the Cold War,I'd love to see millionaires rounded up and shipped off to the Gulag for " re-eucation".

JGM

Bloody stupid computer "I typed " reeducation" but it came out wrong,so I "directed" it,but,at the 2nd attempt it missed out the "d".

JGM

I meant " corrected"not " directed",stupid bloody spell checker!

JGM

Did you see Jeremy Clarkson in the bar on that super yacht? The leather upholstery on the bar stools was from the foreskin of a whale,why!?,and why didn't the interabang catch on,sometimes it's so appropriate.I see all this decedant luxury,then I see all the misery and poverty,rich Pele ate so greedy,I hate the rich!

Alex

There's a good reason people call it the Hate Mail or the Daily Fail! 

There's a great campaign called the Stop Funding Hate campaign - which is taking on "the divisive hate campaigns of the Sun, Daily Mail and Daily Express by persuading advertisers to pull their support."

They've made some great progress - check them out on Facebook.

JGM

These papers have millions of readers,the rich are hugely influential because they own these papers,they're rich so they have a vested interest in running down the National Health Service,if they get I'll they can go private,so why pay tax so a bunch of sick strangers can gat free health care?Then they employ like thinking people as editors and they employ like thinking people as j9urnalsts,what I can't understand is why poor people buy these rags,have you seen poor people dressed in rags sitting on the bus reading The Sun,women!!! reading The Sun,I'd've thought The Sun only appealed to men,but no,they have female readers.There are 2 newsagents who stock The Morning Star and only one who stocks The Socialist Worker in the area, none in my local town,they have e huge piles

JGM

Bloody computer stopped working,they have huge piles of The Daily Mail and The Sun and o4

JGM

Bloody number won't work now,four or five copies of The Socialist Worker,why?Because people buy more copies of The Daily Mail and The Sun,why?Why are all these proles buying pro toff propaganda?

Zec Richardson

JGM said:

Dose it make you angry that other people were born normal but you were born with a disability?I used to go to a facility for "Care In The Community" mental patients,a law student volunteered to work there one summer,she was in a wheel chair,she was born a cripple,I saw an idiot in a wheel chair on telly a couple of days ago,he was born normal,but he was doing stupid stunts on a B.M.X. bike like you see on You've Been Framed and he crippled himself,he's got no one but himself to blame

Well I think that statement is harsh, I don't think we should look at someone differently just because doing something they enjoyed caused their disability! 
I guess I am partly to blame for my disability, running 10 miles a day when I was younger and the job I did played a part in the demise of my mobility and contributed towards me being now reliant on a wheelchair!
Aren't disabled people judged enough without there being a split in disability between those born disabled and those that became disabled later in life?
Maybe it could be harder for those people as they have to make the adjustment of going from able bodied or normal as you say (what is normal?) to coping with disability?
I think that this is equally as offensive as some of the everyday comments that people face!

Fundamentalist

Hi, I'm Fundamentalist. I have about EIGHTEEN different disabilities, not just one. How I feel about the normal crowd depends on their attitude, some are really compassionate and caring, and quiet, so I don't generally have any problem with them, but I really can't stand the typical arrogant, fat-gloating loud mouthed, grossly pig-ignorant and outrageously disrespectful yob know-it-all types who absolutely despise me partly because they're dreadfully badly brought up by similarly grossly pig-ignorant parents and partly because they're not properly educated at school about things like misophonia and severe heat intolerance so they just see me as an easy target for their own sick and perverted pleasure which is why I've become so seriously hard line and aggressive. And I couldn't agree more about stupid dreadfully irresponsible two-faced hypocritical tabloids who stir up paranoia about single middle-aged blokes and what they supposedly get up to when not seen by the easy-lifers. And how they think we're all filthy child-molesting perverts, especially those like me who spend every evening inside instead of spending night after night down the pub. That's just one reason why I never buy or read them. I wouldn't like to even wipe my butt with one. There's far too many normal types who won't dare pick on someone with a white stick or a wheelchair but think they can do what they like to anyone like me, due of course in part to stupid wringing wet left-wing liberal politicians who don't believe in proper discipline and instead go out of their way to create a whole culture of impunity. And then there's the other type of normal crowd who are so "successful" and have such a dreadfully contemptuous and condescending attitude and think they're some kind of big shot and that they're so "superior". and always blame the victim and totally despise anyone like me as well as anyone who is homeless often through no fault of their own. They need to get their facts right and if they start on me they get TOLD! as will any that I catch picking on anyone else who is disabled. It also infuriates me just how many mental health "professionals" have never heard of misophonia when they of all people should know about such things, it supposed to be their job. It's because we have so many grossly pig-ignorant yob types who no-one in their right mind would ever employ that I think we should have compulsory military boot camps for ALL able bodied and able minded school leavers, no getting out of it for the filthy rich crowd! And we should have FAR stricter discipline in secondary schools too. I've met loads of folk who agree with me on those points and I stand by it. Fm.

CathyInSouthAfrica

It is really tough dealing with anger when you have a disability. Recently I found a really angry letter I wrote to my mother when I was 10, lol. It was hilarious in one way, but I can still feel the resentment now.

I found going to Alanon really helped. It is really humbling to find out how many people suffer in so many different ways, it helped me have a different perspective and deeper understanding that you can't change others, you can only change yourself. I had a few pity parties about that myself, but there is a surprising relief in eventually coming to terms with it. 
They say that being angry with some-one gives them power over you - as true as that is, I still give some very undeserving people power over me - my bad!
No-one wins in the blame game, least of all the initiator. I love cliches, not least because there is always a direct opposite which is as equally valid.
Thank you Zec Richardson - I like your post.  Disability shouldn't divide us. I think having a disability later in life has different challenges, but it is neither harder nor easier, we all need to help each other.

As Monty Python says, Always Look on the Bright Side of Life - when you do try to find solutions to your problems, you can meet the most wonderful people.  Finding the treasures in people makes life worthwhile for me, and I think that's what we all want, some-one to find the treasures in us.  I am really sorry that you are hurting JGM, but even the most arrogant of people are just one hit by a bus from a wheelchair themselves - and I feel very compassionate about how little they should feel for their own worthiness for assistance and tolerance should it unfortunately happen to them.

I am sorry if this comes across as condescending, another of my faults, but I really believe anger is a really powerful force which can be redirected and used for the good.  I always felt betrayed that no-one told me that there were techniques that can help you deal with it constructively. It is a normal reaction, and everyone has to come to terms with it.  I really empathize with the anger, and respect your right to deal with it in your own way. But I feel better when I find something good, and your post has reminded me to look at some simmering issues of my own. Maybe you can be generous enough to find something that helps you in my blurb.

Zec Richardson

I agree @CathyInSouthAfrica anger is a wasted emotion and hurts nobody except ourselves!
Someone treats us unfairly and we spend hours or days sometimes thinking about it and the person who caused this hurt is most probably not even thinking about the event at all. 
I spent years mulling over being extremely unfairly treated by a priest (it's okay not sexually) and my anger and replaying it in my head did nothing but make me feel worse. Luckily I did move on and I now don't let people's words hurt, what they say isn't my problem, people can only hurt me if I allow their words to hurt me!

chasnbons

It looks like I have missed a few things in my absence and some of them aren't very nice.

Rather than go through everything word by word and risking being removed from the site for disagreeing with most statements, my only comment will be......

@Fundamentalist As difficult as you may find it. Maybe try and be nice instead of nasty, and not as judgemental as you claim others are.  If you treat others with respect, you DO get respect back....eventually.  

All the hurt, anger and animosity you seem to have is doing nobody and good, least of all you.

Zec Richardson

Nicely said @chasnbons!
When people say nasty things to me, I smile and say "I'm sorry you feel that way"

I feel so much better than when I would get angry and anyway smiling at them confuses the hell out if them!

Markmywords

You have two choices with severe disability, you bend in the wind of fate or you go insane with rage at it.

You have only one body, decrepit or otherwise. You cannot go to war against it.

I got cancer at 40 and the treatment was a thousand times worse than the disease in my case. I had to come to terms with constant pain and a body and face that I no longer recognised in the mirror.

Doctors don't like it when you tell them "Thanks for the help but I'd have been better off if you'd not saved me."

There are things unimaginably worse than everything stopping for good.

I don't resent statistically normal people nor do I believe that they should be grateful for good health.

The revulsion and discrimination of the statistically normal is a big problem but compared to just getting through another day it's a minor irritation.

Sam_Alumni

Please do remember our community guidelines, We want the community to be a safe and supportive place for all and so it is important to remember that words read online don’t always convey tone or context and so may be misinterpreted and cause offence, therefore it is important to consider language and audience. 

chasnbons

@Sam_Scope I agree totally, but I'm confused as to why you posted it in this thread as I can't see any relevance in any of todays posts.  

There are other posts in different threads with content much more relevant to your link, which you haven't highlighted by posting the same link.  Like you say the written word isn't always read as it was written, but I have read a few recent posts today which I find in part offensive, to be honest, and on occasion quite rude.  Some words come across as quite inflammatory yet no reference to community guidelines has been given, which seems rather unfair.

Sam_Alumni

@chasnbons We are always working on keeping the community safe and I will be posting reminders on any posts where it feels necessary and we are creating a post that is a general reminder to all.  

Please do feel free to contact us with any posts you feel there are issues with.

Sam 

JGM

I was just wondering,have any of you seen the movie "Acción Mutante", and if so,did it make you want to go out and do something?

chasnbons

@Sam_Scope Thanks for the reply.

Fair enough but you should at least quote the post you feel necessitates the reminder.   Just putting it in the middle of a thread like you have here, doesn't help people in knowing what has been said which you feel is against guidelines.  All it achieves is people wondering if you mean them, and that brings the risk people not posting 'just in case'.

Everyone has the right to their own opinion, view and way of life, but there are ways of saying things without being rude and abrupt.

It's not up to me to say which posts I feel there are issues with, as I feel they are self evident with the tones and words used in them.  Plus just because I have issues with them, doesn't mean that other people will.

Sam_Alumni

I understand your frustrations @chasnbons and apologise if my post unsettled you.  It was just a gentle reminder of the community guidelines and I hope that you can understand that we are trying to keep this community safe and supportive for all. 

As one of our valued members, please do get in touch if you have issues with posts, it is the only way we can deal with problems and support all members.

I have emailed you and so please do let me know any comments or suggestions that we can discuss to make this community even better.  

Thanks so much for your input,
Sam

chasnbons

@Sam_Scope

Thanks for the email, I'm just replying to you now hun.

Zec Richardson

@chasnbons it is possibly in reference to the original post referring to a wheelchair user as a cripple and then implying that someone who causes their disability through an extreme sport only has themselves to blame.
I flagged it as I found it offensive and that kind of remark is not needed!

chasnbons

@Zec Richardson thanks for that, but I just read it again and sussed it out.  I was VERY tired when I first read it, so it obviously didn't sink in what I had just read  Plus I have more stress than usual as I'm worrying about my Mum, who has pneumonia, but had to give up her hospital bed for someone 'more ill' than her.  Never mind the fact that since being discharged her GP has had to change the medication as what the hospital had given her wasn't having any effect, and that if her breathing gets worse (they gave her a peak flow thing to blow into every hour) she has to ring 999 and get readmitted. Which basically means (if last time is anything to go by) another 8 hours on a trolley in a corridor then being moved to FOUR different wards in TWO days!

Sam_Alumni

Oh @chasnbons I am sorry to hear about your mum, that sounds like such a stressful situation, especially in the run up to Christmas!

chasnbons

Thanks @Sam_Scope she lives 100 miles away from me so to say it's difficult is an understatement.  The best I can do for now is ring her a few times a day, to make sure she isn't any worse.

Zec Richardson

Oh @chasnbons why am I not surprised by this?
I used to feel safe knowing that if needed the hospital would be there but now I don't feel that way, I was left sat in my wheelchair for 5 hours waiting for a bed, a consultant left me naked on the examination bed thing and ssaid don't get dressed I will be back and didn't come back and when I did get a bed I was sent to x-ray and on return my bed had been given to someone else!
I hope your mum gets well soon, she needs to complain about this!!!

Fundamentalist

Hi all, Fm here. There seems to be some misunderstanding here, and people always misunderstand me and always have done and this leads to all manner of needless aggro. First of all I do NOT have ANY personal grudges against anyone, and of course there are those in my local area who have stupid needless grudges against me, some of them lasting decades just because I stand up to them when they try and barge into my life and take over because they think they own me as far too many do all over the place and they most certainly do NOT! When I get mad with anyone it's never personal, I just do what has to be done as unfortunately some folk in my area just don't know when to stop and just won't be told because there is unfortunately a culture of gross impunity in this country now which has been caused by far too liberal a regime which needs tightening up in many areas. Whenever you have far too liberal a regime and far too widespread sheer Godlessness and total lack of God-fearing you will always end up with sheer anarchy as we're seeing in the UK today and it has to change at some stage and change for the better and that will only happen when enough Christians get their act together and start Evangelising the nation proper as has been done elsewhere around the world. Also don't forget the evil is often in the eye of the beholder, I have read all the terms and as I see it nothing I've said has any predjudice against any particular group or individual. I'm not in the habit of singling out any group or individual but far too many do such a thing with me and always have done, ever since I was in my pram! Why can't everyone be like little toddlers, they're by far the most civilised generation and they're frequently really friendly to me and never hostile, they often greet me as if they knew me even when they've never seen me before. This is probably because I really love little ones and I sometimes get really upset because I can't have any of my own which I would really love. And also anger isn't always such a negative thing, it has given me real strength of character in recent years and when I was much younger I was always too soft and submissive but not any more, no way! But caving in and submitting to all and sundry is what I'm expected to do and I absolutely will not! No-one and nothing in this world owns me and never will, I stand by everything I've written and it's based on hard and brutal experience which I really don't need. Also have you ever read the Gospel of John, chapter 2, verse 12 onwards about how Jesus cleared the temple? What he did would nowadays be termed direct action and I sometimes wish I could travel back in time and see the event as it happened. He really got them told because they needed it, they were seriously desecrating the temple. Fm.

Sam_Alumni

@Fundamentalist I need to remind you of our community guidelines, we want the community to be a safe and supportive place. Please make sure your messages respect other users’ views and suggestions, even if you don’t agree with them.

Take care to present your views tactfully, be aware that your views may upset and offend other members. 

Your comments can be seen as controversial and whilst you are entitled to your opinion, you need to see how this effects others and consider how you share them.  

Before you post, perhaps you can question, is this relevant? Is this useful? Will this upset other members? 

If you post content that is upsetting to the community, the consequences can be:

1. Formal warnings
2. Editing/Removal of posts
3. Temporary or permanent banning from the site.

I hope you can work out another way to communicate your feelings in a way that isn't upsetting to the community and we can enjoy your involvement here.

If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to get in touch via [email protected] 

Fundamentalist

Fm here. What is wrong with my posting? If some folk choose to wrongly take any of it as personal that's not my fault. I don't see anything wrong with it. You must understand that disability is a highly emotive subject and we don't all have such nice happy-clappy perfect lives like those on the TV adverts, which of course I don't watch as they furiously annoy me. It seems to me that far too many folk just don't want to know about folk who are so severely disabled as I am and would rather just conveniently sweep them under the carpet out of the way just like they do on the TV where anyone like me are NEVER mentioned and if I write to them they just don't want to know. They just like to show the public a really false impression of disability and that way bias public opinion and it seems to me that it's the same here too which I hope not. What on earth is wrong with me showing the kind of thing that happens to me everyday which I might add is far, FAR worse than merely offensive, it's absolute torture. Perhaps you've never heard of anyone disabled like me before, well there's a first time for all sorts. You know as well as I do that disability is not just "white sticks and wheelchairs" as the TV media would have the public think, just like the train operators and the authorities etc. And I did mention on my very first post on this forum that I have strong opinions. And the things that happen to me everyday are absolutely dreadful, I don't get to enjoy anything properly at all, It's the things that are supposed to be so "enjoyable" that are turned against me and are absolute torture to me, you must understand that such people do exist and that's why I joined this site to try and make that more well known. I am certainly not a typical 21st century, "politically correct" left-wing liberal and I never will be and I don't see anything wrong with that. Someone has to stand up for folk like me and I also find it really offensive when anyone complains about me being the way I am, none of us are perfect. I have not said anything racist, sexist, or sexually explicit, or anti-gay, or anti-religious etc. You must somehow understand that some disabled folk have absolutely dreadful lives and don't have such joyful, sociable lives and can't fit in anywhere and they can't help it and it really annoys me when so many keep blaming the victim. All I'm doing is stating simple fact, You should hear some of the appalling things I get called by grossly anti-social louts on the buses and in the streets etc. I couldn't possibly type any of it here. I really am sick and tired of the false impression of disability that just about everybody in the media and the public have. The deaf have their community, the blind have theirs, and so do a lot of folk in wheelchairs, but if you're like me then there's is no such thing as community, you're on your own. And given half a chance as anyone who really knows me already knows I can be really loving and compassionate and I would really love to have a nice wife and a sweet little girl but there's absolutely no chance, oh no, my father made absolutely sure of that and I don't mind sharing that publicly, the more people know about folk like me, the better. I can't go around telling folk a pack of lies just to give them the nice perfect impression that they expect, life isn't like that. This is a really cruel world as I'm sure you must be well aware. People need to face up to reality which is what this is. Like I've already said I really believe in discipline and order in society and if we had more of that we wouldn't be in the mess we're in with so much dreadful anti-social behaviour. What is wrong with discipline? it's essential to life. It doesn't have to mean a brutal fascist state as so many think. Now what is "offensive" about that? Fm.

Chris_Alumni

@Fundamentalist - we sympathise with your difficulties, and do not wish to censor you but please understand that there are many people in this community with many different views.

While you may have certain political views and it may on occasion be appropriate to voice them in the context of a relevant discussion, this is not a forum for discussing political views. It is a community intended for people to share their experiences, ask questions and help each other.

Please be aware that most people come to the community for friendly discussion, rather than to hear political viewpoints - there are many other places online which are intended for this type of discussion. You are welcome in the community and we hope that you find it helpful, but please respect that others may not share your views, and that it may not be the most appropriate place to discuss them.

Sam_Alumni

Hi @Fundamentalist

I understand that disability is an emotive issue and this community is a place for people to share their feelings, but it is important that everyone feels safe and supported here.

We all have to accept that not everyone will share our views and may be upset by them and so we have guidelines in place to ensure the community as a whole is a happy one, we share these guidelines with all members and aim to support everyone to use this place as an informative and helpful place.

Please feel free to contact the team direct if you need any further clarification.

Best wishes to you,
Sam

Fundamentalist

Hi all, FM here again. Can someone please tell me why they're using the @ symbol? what is this? Also, it appears that some folk find some of my posting a wee bit "offensive", but I've re-read them over again and I can't find anything that seriously wrong, I do know what I can and can't put on a public forum, just as you have to be careful what you put in a newspaper or magazine or else you end up prosecuted or worse... Also what about all the things I find offensive in this country of ours? What if I were to list them would anyone find that offensive or even see it as grounds for legal action? This offensiveness thing works both ways. I find a whole load of things extremely offensive which are legal and are arrogantly promoted and displayed all over the place, some seasonal and some year round. I also find some people's behaviour in public highly offensive, should I complain about that, or is this not the place? Or does it depend what they do? Nobody here seems that bothered about what I find offensive. And there are quite a few things I find far worse than merely "offensive", especially some of the absolutely appalling things which routinely happen to me which leave mere offensiveness way behind. It seems to me that some folk are a wee bit too easily offended, what I've put in my posts is normal language for me, just as blatant anti-Christian blasphemy is routine language for far too many folk in this country of ours both in public and on TV and radio which I find right out of order, not just offensive. It's far more serious than swearing yet is totally ignored and never bleeped out as it certainly should be, especially on children's programming where it should be banned altogether. I wouldn't DARE blaspheme! Fm.

bam

@Fundamentalist  please give it a little rest. It doesn't matter what you find offensive it's the community who finds some of your posts to be offensive. you've been arguing about this for days now. just give us a break for a little while

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Zec Richardson

I agree @Fundamentalist sometimes we can't see what we are doing or writing to be wrong, that is because we see it with our values!
People are telling you that your posts are annoying and your views are quite extreme and offensive to some and so that tells you that it is wrong!
This forum is for people to talk safely about disability and life with a disability, it isn't a place to discuss politics and or religion, I'm sure there are other forums that are tailored for those types of topics.
My advice would be to take what has been said on board and stop posting such strong views, the admins here are extremely tolerant but I should imagine that if you continue as you are, you may be removed and I'm sure that isn't what you want!
Also surely seeing life as a battle like you clearly do, has to be stressful and it's unnecessary, there will always be people who do not approve or look upon others with distain, but that is unfortunately life and I have found that by choosing to ignore and just not let it bother me, I feel so much better and relaxed and happier!

Fundamentalist

Comment removed by Moderator.

bam

@Fundamentalist  I think everyone on here has suffered maybe not to the extent maybe you feel like you've suffered but we have all struggled. this is not a competition Fundamentalist. this is a community that is designed to support  the people who need it the most, the people that don't have a common voice  to vent their frustrations and anxieties over their health problems. you don't have a democratic right to commit violence upon another human being. we are all suffering here. some of us are just struggling to survive to the next day

Zec Richardson

Agreed @bam

Alex

Hi everyone,

 This discussion has run its course and I feel has now gone off topic. I'm therefore closing it to further comments.

 Thanks to everyone who has contributed. If you'd like to get in touch with the Scope team privately, you can email us at [email protected]

 Hope you have a good evening.