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Late diagnosed Aspie at 45

Hi,
Should any adults wish to know a late diagnosed adult's experience with the assessment procedure, feel free to ask.

I am part of what's known as the lost generation, so those born before 1980 missed out completely on getting support during school years, and were written off by family, teachers and generally everyone.

I am British, and became a golf professional, trained chef, wine expert, diet freak, and can identify fake Faberges from originals, and I am bi-lingual( English/German) and normally work in Germany

I look forward to any questions.

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Hi Mum?
It was very simple. I went to my NHS GP and asked for a referral, she was surprised but then made an immediate referral after I told her about my concerns. I had questionnaires sent to me to be returned and only then did I receive an appointment for an assessment/test. All my life I have been struggling, and was called weird, etc... The DX saved my life.

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So were you assessed formally? The NAS pays for the Assessment.

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Your sons were diagnosed by the NAS? But if you request a referral via your GP then things will not go topsyturvy, are you struggling with life and with mental health? I was, and my diagnosis helped me enormously.

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mumof3boys said:

I find expressing verbally awkward,when I was in school I never understood maths and English,but I can spell words better then my family....love biology and the working of a computer....

I struggled immensely with maths, but the teaching method wasn't suitable for me, plus my teachers didn't want me in the school. I excelled at English, but not in the school environment. Did you read human anatomy at age 10? I did, it fascinated me, and I am good with computers and repair my laptop when it has problems.

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mumof3boys said:

I never read as I kept losing track were I was up to I learnt more by sight on specific subjects...I took more in that way...

Same here, it's to do with our poor ability to process information fast enough...fun isn't it?

Hello @davidj49,

just wanted to say thankyou for your offer of help and also your experiences I too am a late diagnosed case from the 'lost generation of the 80's' so to speak.

I learnt to read music and play the piano at 6 going on to winning accolades for 'the highest pass mark' for pianoforte exams,
I adored playing but because (naturally) my parents were proud of me they and my beaming piano teacher would put me into festivals and competitions which I hated, all that attention..
It's only now I realise why.

I would hide upstairs when my parents would have parties and want me to play the piano, I so wanted to please them but couldn't mentally cope with the situation.

All my life through school i excelled academically and with sport, I played netball and hockey for the school loving it, yet couldn't bear being used as an example.

I remember a teacher saying I was 'the devil' (I kid you not!!) because I couldn't grasp a particular way of painting, I kept doing it backwards (don't ask me how!!)

An ex boyfriend (who incidentally was a pilot with the obligatory twirly moustache.. haha it's true!!) said I was a "rocket scientist but can't tie your own shoe laces" I can by the way but you know what he meant.

Disparaging remarks.
Being called weird crazy mad even retarded (awful word).. that was from one of my neighbours who I had tried to advise to walk his dogs so they wouldn't be so aggressive.. he'd heard the way I talked to my Golden Retriever lovingly and used to copy what I said, like a child in a playground poking fun
i now know it's him that has the problems not me!!

But it affected me so greatly I wouldn't leave my house for fear of him shouting his verbal attacks.

As as someone who's recently been diagnosed as having high functioning Autism you can imagine how bewildered I was when friends would say 'ignore him' yet I couldn't, his words would frighten me yet I was never frightened of him.

I went on to study clinical psychology and working with troubled teenagers who'd been abused and neglected, bringing them out of their black holes of self deprication and lack of self respect.
I loved my job I was good at it, but it was affecting me so sad were the stories I came across, though my love of how the brain works remained and how the way we think can be changed with patience and time.

I now now work on my own (hurrah!) it's my own business, I'm a Dog Psychologist and Behaviourist, rehabilitating dogs and re training how they think so they and their owners can have happier relationships.

I'm at last as peace with myself. Animals have been my co pilots in life, loving me whether I'm 'crazy' or quiet. Introverted or enthusiastic. Depressed or gregarious.

And everyday i day I wake up and hope others who felt like me can find their place that is serene

Thanks Joanna, I hope others gain the courage to talk and ask questions.

It seems that you finally found what you have been looking for, that's amazing.

It took a long time @davidj49!

Sometimes though I feel the most important things in our life we have to wait for

joannarashelle said:

It took a long time @davidj49!

Sometimes though I feel the most important things in our life we have to wait for

Yes, but you got there, and now with your late diagnosis you can can work on your strengths.

This is fascinating and an eye opener to me @davidj49!

All I've ever thought is what I can't do other than what I can!

You're so right and thank you for bringing it to my (our!) attention.. with a diagnosis al be it a late one, we can focus on our strengths

Thanks Joanna,

I learnt to concentrate on my skills and forget doing things I feel uncomfortable doing, in the end it wears you out.

Relaxation techniques help me immensely, such as listening to certain songs and music
One piece I listen to is by .....Pat Metheny - The Truth Will Always Be

The truth is me, and I will always be me.

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