Parents, carers and disabled parents
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Should I give up work and become a full-time carer for my baby?

shazza119shazza119 Member Posts: 7 Connected
I am a wife and mother to a gorgeous 18 month old baby boy he recently had an assessment with the peadiatric specialist team as he can’t hold his head up yet, Crawl sit or stand he now has a list as long as well let’s say a piece of string of appointment with various specialists I’m finding it very difficult to cope with working and all the appointments he has. Does anybody know if I was to give up work to be home with him full time would there be any financial help that I could get. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you 


  • JennysDadJennysDad Member Posts: 2,308 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello Sharon @shazza118 and a warm welcome to the community. I'm not qualified to answer your financial question, but we have others here who will, I'm sure, be able to advise you on the best way forward. They will be in touch with you as soon as possible.
    In the meantime you might like to have a look at our Parents and Carers forum and see if there is anything there of interest to you. If you're able to join in, it's a good way to meet new people.
    I do have some idea of what you are going through, and I hope we will be able to be of service to you.
    Warmest best wishes,
  • shazza119shazza119 Member Posts: 7 Connected
    Hello [email protected],
    thank you for the advice I really appreciate it, I will look at the parents & carers forum now
    best wishes to you also 
  • Richard_ScopeRichard_Scope Posts: 2,829

    Scope community team

    Hi @shazza119

    Welcome to Scope's community! It's great to have you here.  Just to get you started we have a How To Guide here, you can see all the latest posts here, jump in and get involved and don't worry we are a friendly bunch!  We have a helpline that you can call on 0808 800 3333.

    Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy

    Want to tell us about your experience on the community? Talk to our chatbot and let us know. 
  • mikehughescqmikehughescq Member Posts: 6,532 Disability Gamechanger
    You need face to face advice about the financial implications before you do anything as there are some things which cannot be undone. 
  • shazza119shazza119 Member Posts: 7 Connected
    Hi Mile, I would never give up work until I know for sure what help there is out there I was just wondering if anybody on here has gone through a similar situation, but thank you for the advice.
  • BrookesieBrookesie Member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi @shazza119
    I gave up work for my son after he was born. At the time I wasn't sure how it would work financially, The DLA and Carers I get help but it's still a case of holidays at home as going abroad isn't possible.
    I don't regret it, by being at home I was able to do regular PT which helped him learn to sit, stand, walk and crawl. We did speech therapy, Makaton, I turned everything I could think of into some kind of therapy.
    When therapists told me there was nothing more they could do I went online and found other suggestions and continued no matter what, then when I did follow ups they would say how much better he's doing and ask what i'd been doing so clearly it was working and worth it no matter how much time and effort I took.
    It can be difficult, emotionally and physically. Some days are harder than others. For a while I felt overwhelmed and it was important to feel like more than just a mum and carer. When he was old enough to go to nursery I spent a lot of time panicking, would he manage, would they manage. Eventually I realise they managed even on the days he didn't then I started doing volunteer work and felt much better. I even went back to working part time during hours my husband was home but it became impossible with drs appointments and therapy. They weren't supportive and changed my hours so I was unable to work so I had to resign.
    Now I take him to school and his drs/therapy sessions without the worry of loosing my job and knowing the financial situation is much less stressful. After school we spend time on his education and developmental delay and when he's at school I can research his medical conditions, therapy and look for ways to help manage his emotional and behavioural difficulties.
    It is worth it. Truly I don't think he'd be as developed if I hadn't.
  • shazza119shazza119 Member Posts: 7 Connected
    Hi @Brookesie
    you are the  first person on line or off line who seems to actually know what I am going through and everything you have said about your son sounds very similar to mine. The real problem I’m having is finding someone who truly understands that I can turn to whenever I’m struggling which at he minute is quite often friends and family so try but can’t teally appreciate how difficult this is, I work part time as a carer for the elderly from 7am till 2 and have to try and fit appointments after 2 and so far my work has been fairly understanding but I have to keep asking for the odd morning off or lunch time and feel that they are getting slightly miffed and I’m getting so tired with all the running around. I just don’t know what to do for the best half the time, I’m getting very run down myself which isn’t helping x
  • mikehughescqmikehughescq Member Posts: 6,532 Disability Gamechanger
    Have you ever 

    a) got face to face benefits advice?

    b) got yourself a carers assessment from your local authority?
  • BrookesieBrookesie Member Posts: 9 Listener
    @shazza119 maybe we can talk more support each other?
    Like you I haven't met anyone else who truly understands what its like, would be nice to have company in crazy town!
  • shazza119shazza119 Member Posts: 7 Connected
    edited June 2018
    @Brookesie, thanks that would be great sometimes I just feel a little lost if you want to email me direct rather than on here my email is [email address removed by moderator]  Would be great to hear from you Sharon
  • BrookesieBrookesie Member Posts: 9 Listener
    Thanks Sharon I will email you later.
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