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Update
cripps
Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
hi everyone Neil here, wasn’t sure if i was ever going to post another note to you again but here i am, on Wednesday morning i tried to commit Suicide and ended up in intensive care. I got to a point where in my life i really couldn’t see another way out, things really where difficult and ending my life was easy. When i was taking the overdose i wasn’t sad but happy i wouldn’t have to try and cope with life and my disability anymore. It was all planned so i locked the windows and doors and went for it. I don’t remember anything after that, all i do remember is waking up in hospital in intensive care with tubes and wires sticking out of me and nurses running around trying to talk to me. After 3 or 4 days of trying to get my feelings under control the mental health team came to visit me. With the long chat over they decided i was fit and able to go home . One thing i did Agee to was to have regular appointments with there team to make sure i told them everything and i never got to a point where Suicide was the only option available. It’s only been a few days so I’ve got a long way to go but as I’m typing this post i know I’m going to need a lot of help to get through what ever is happening with myself and I’m going to need my friends even more. I’ll let you know how things are going from time to time and maybe let you into why i came to the decision to end my life so keep checking this wonderful forum because without it there would be a lot of unhappy disabled people around. Take care everyone it’s been a pleasure posting. NC
Replies
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I'm so sorry you have been going through a very difficult time.
I know the community will help you and support you.
I've been there myself so I know how you must have felt.
If you ever need a friendly chat I'm here.
Bev x
I think you have a very special friend, he cares for you a lot.
I was the same, feeling angry, upset, confused, frightened. Will things change or will the abuse still continue.
The doctor just threatened to lock me up if I did it again.
It's good that you are getting the help and support you need.
Bev x
I was so frightened, I was only 16 at the time. No one asked me why i did it or offered me any support.
I've struggled with depression since I was 11, with 3 attempts.
I did have councilling and that did help.
Since i became disabled just 2 years ago, ive been put on 2 anti depressants.
Being deaf can be a struggle to find the right help.
I've lost friends but i do have my husband who supports me and my children.
I have made some lovely friends on here, who I talk to all the time.
They give me advice, support and encourageent.
Bev x
I really feel for you buddy because the whole process of going round and around just to survive is hard. One thing I have learnt since I did the same as yourself it made me more determined to fight these people and not let them add you as Just a statistic on a bit of paper.
Stay strong stay safe. Where all here for you and you know that. God bless.
I created one of the campaign election video for Labour, and Jeremy Corbyn,
This is a new version of Emeli Sande, Hope "You Are Not Alone
You can see the video here.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=P5o8hRHh9IY
Ive had a lovely day thank you.
Hope your ok.
Yes go out, don't sit in the house waiting.
Sounds like you have a lovely day planned out.
Enjoy your day.
Bev
I have been thinking about doing this for a while and don’t know how to, have done a search online but still don’t know.
@[email protected], glad to gear your getting out and about now
Just a thought that maybe you need rest, your mind and body has been through a lot with the OD
So sorry your having a bad day.
Have you got through to the mental health team?
Can your doctor not help push it through quicker for you?
They phoned my husband the same day, I went to see mine.
I wish i knew what to say
If your struggling you can also contact the Samaritans?
Bev
I understand,i attempted suicide just a couple of weeks ago after many years of on/off suicidal thoughts.
It is hard to get help sometimes for any mental illness such as depression as the vast majority of professional people you turn to initially for help simply don't/won't understand or learn.
2 days after my attempt,my GP tried to prescribe the same anti depressant i had taken 3 years ago,i had never felr so low in my life at that point and it was the cause of me changing gp surgeries-all in my notes but my gp didn't look before printing out the script obviously.
On the plus side,it's nice to see so many positive,encouraging comments rather than snipey,sarcastic replies you can get when a certain type of person thinks before they type,there is no need or tolerance foir that on a site like this,surely.
I hope you'll be ok
@cripps Now you have now got a team in place hopefully it won't take to long to see them they will help you I've now been with mine for over 4 years and help me sort lots of things out Benefits being one. You will still get days why bother but one you can trust them you will be glad you did.
Also don't let this beat you, your worth more than that Neil and being alone is very hard. I thought I would never be in the situation of being alone but how wrong I was it's one of the most hardest things to cope with, I don't trust people FTF that's why I won't got to Benefit assessments my team deal with them for me so far so good. Take care buddy and that goes for anyone else in this situation.
I created one of the campaign election video for Labour, and Jeremy Corbyn,
This is a new version of Emeli Sande, Hope "You Are Not Alone
You can see the video here.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=P5o8hRHh9IY
Hope you've had a good night?
I'm so relieved you are now getting help, from the mental health team.
And your doctor is now supporting you too. You sound positive this morning, which is really good to hear.
Have a lovely day
Bev x