Only member of household not ASD

ilovetodig0044

Hi All
I’m new here but
From reading the last few discussions I think I may have come to the right place!
I am the step father to two boys; the eldest (14) was diagnosed with high functioning autism, adhd, Tourette’s and generalised anxiety disorder when very young and copes relatively well at school. 
My wife (37) has just recieved a diagnosis of Aspergers, which was sought out because of our experience with our eldest boy, which actually didn’t come as a shock to either of us. 
To complete the hat-trick, my youngest step son (10) recieved an asbergers diagnosis a week ago and is likely to be diagnosed with adhd as well. His diagnosis took a long time to confirm as we as well as the doctors were unsure if he was genuinely asd or whether he was replicating autistic behaviours from his older brother whom he idolises. 

Needless to say, living in a house with 3 highly functional asd family members is proving to be a challenge for us all, family dinner times are frequently taken up with 3 separate conversations excitedly interwoven together; each has varying degrees of understanding of external emotions and social signs and each has different levels of organisational and timekeeping difficulties which frequently clash. Frequently I feel completely overwhelmed and unable to manage everything at once.

I was was hoping you might be able to offer simple solutions/ advice on dealing with a family (all of whom I love very much) that all have differently displaying autism.

thank you