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PLEASE CAN I ASK HOW DO I GET MY FRIEND TO BECOME MY SUPPORT

thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
edited June 2018 in Disabled people
Hello every body I would like to ask the community how do I get my friend to be my support.

Understand this am disabled and have mental health issues. Since the last year have no support but thought about finding such.

As time moves on. Considering options one is to ask my friend to be my support.

Did read on here a while ago a lady I think lives on her own and has the similar scenario to me.

My friend lives up the road is helpful and useful. In the sense he is there for me and advise me on a range of subjects and themes and topics.

Being the older disabled need some one in the background to just assist but feel also could help as such some things I struggle to do.

Cope as I can do. You have to try to do the best you can. Yet if and when I need some one to assist with the little things. Looking at for example making a meal for me, shopping and social outings maybe, checking am taking medications. Advise on complex matters personal to me.

Filling out this PIP form made me realise how vulnerable am I. also coping and managing my life best as I could.

Social Direct is it pointless ringing because it is not the sort of aspect of care they do. Besides these councils have no money. Had them come out.  Before.  Waste of time and effort.

Discussing this yesterday with my friend. Could he be my support. Only problem is my benefits and would not be able to pay him at this precise moment. Because I have ESA in the support group and have applied for PIP.  Not enough then to give him and me then to live on.

May I add further this is an enquiry. Just a thought at the moment . Where and how would the money come from.  Have heard of direct payments. Is there a separate benefit.  I would need to apply for.

Thank you every body.

@thespiceman
Community Champion
SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
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Replies

  • susan48susan48 Member Posts: 2,229 Disability Gamechanger
    edited June 2018
    Hi @thespiceman,

    the friend maybe able to get carers allowance but maybe CAB can help with what you’d need to do and what possible other helps available.



    my son and friend helps me but I get no financial help as they work.

    Sorry I’m not much help and if Iv read your post wrongly
  • RoseKRoseK Member Posts: 2 Listener
    Hello

    From my experience of caring for a family member ( 3+ years) who can no longer do anything for herself due having Lewy Bodies dementia I was told that i would have to apply for the following benefits, Carers allowance and that since it was full time caring that i could claim income support. the downside is that if your friend claims these there is a chance that it could affect your benefits. Personally i would seek advice from an adviser at maybe the job center to see how it would affect you and your friend. I'm sorry i can't be more help .

    Rose k

     
  • thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @susan48 Thank you for this. No you have not got it wrong.

    Thoughts in my minds as others are probably in a similar situation.

    I thought I need to find out.

    Thanks the information.

    Misunderstood what and how to proceed. Just an enquiry because that was my big fear effecting benefits.

    Please take care

    @thespiceman
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @RoseK Pleased to meet you welcome.

    Thanks for the advice you have been helpful.

    I see reading others are in the same position as I am.

    Thank you for sharing.

    I will seek and find out. Could be the DWP website an idea that is a suggestion might do.

    Understand could effect benefits.  Always does if trying to help ones self.

    Wonder how many like me. No go with Social Direct.  Due to costs and budgets. As we all age how and where is the support going to come from and what costs.  To the people need that support.

    Great to meet you

    Take care

    @thespiceman
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • TopkittenTopkitten Member Posts: 1,263 Pioneering
    Generally the severe disability premium and carer's allowance are considered the same, so you can have only one or the other. If you claim it you pay for your help, if you don't then they can claim for helping. At least that is how I understand it.

    As for a friend helping.... then maybe just keep things as they are as changing the situation to your suggestion may lose you a friend and, eventually, a helper. We view a helping friend much differently to a carer and, for example when stressed, do not treat them the same way, expecting a carer to help rather than appreciating a friend doing the same thing.

    I think this is something you should consider very carefully before going into it.

    TK
    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
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