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Surviving PTSD clinical depression asd and carer
Looking at categories this comes under too many to as usual fit in a box like I do not....
I am at point a lot of times that I am drowning . A lot of those times people are still stepping on my head ( figuratively ) . Find myself spinning plates and trying to keep other people that I care for above the water and always asking LA for help and support with the same dumb look or answer of its the budget cuts . What for more than 10 years !!!?? . Point is they ( LA ) Never help out unless you get lawyers involved . I mean who has patience for that ? I've done it before for couple of things and I felt like my sanity and life being sucked away esp with the housing lark . I'm sick and tired of being told as I seem to function kids go to school I feed them they clothed I'm not an alcoholic or drug user they fine ?? please !!! Can't they see the stitching and patching just about holding me together . The broker ares council failing my kids the SEN the EHC the everything is so wrong I could just blow my lid . I awaiting a carers assessment for 4 years was illegally told I wasn't entitled to one I sound quite livid yes I am but also get to the point I can not be bothered any more . Feel so low sometimes so bloody sad I even ask Google what's the point of it all . People don't seem to understand when you list your illnesses and ailments how much it takes sometimes to put a foot in front of other. Walking in pain . Resenting the one you look after thinking I could be having a damn life instead I'm stuck unsupported with myou own depression and pain to try and overlook asked for respite you go around in circles as my 2 are considered not disabled enough ?? I mean what stupidity is that ???????? What constitutes disabled enough I'm not going to swear but ffs am I not suicidal enough for you fw's ?? Am I too angry because I've been so sweet and mild in the past been pushed pillar to post led up and down the path . Been given wrong info led a merry dance and wasted years of my life leading me nowhere with no further help ? So tired so worn down I hardiet bother with these council people but it gets me annoyed how they letting my family and I down . Should I become one of these ranting nutty mothers wrecking the place ? Should I of encouraged my placid children to throw chairs at teachers these are the people that get noticed and get the services . Sounds resentful ? Yes but got to the point I don't give a hoot but also gave up want to leave society behind live on an island. It would be less hurtful than the way society and peers treat my kids not nasty but not including them either it's like living in isolated bubble where you can look but dont come over hear about others lives and how they function but live in disfunction and total isolation as services don't recognise asperger they fine they work good at education they placid they're good little workers . What about a social existence others take for granted . What about the joy of good friendships and having other people rather than just me ? So peeeeved . This life is not normal . Yet if I closed my kids in a closet and locked them away that's infringement of rights . I know we not going to be in Europe much longer but EU law states councils and LA have a legal obligation for SEN to have access and be include in community . Go figure ?
Excuse the lack of grammar ain't got the time anymore
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