Hi, my name is lovelymummylivi! — Scope | Disability forum
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Hi, my name is lovelymummylivi!

lovelymummylivi
lovelymummylivi Member Posts: 7 Listener
edited May 2019 in Start here and say hello!
I’ve just signed up for the 6 week Navigate Service Scope are offering. One of my objectives this week is to register with the Scope community & get talking to other families.

My son is 6, Max He has a diagnosis of Aspergers with a PDA profile. Home life is a massive struggle. He demands all my attention & tries to control all situations. My husband and other son who is 4, Ted, are also struggling. Max takes all his anger out on his Dad, plays with my emotions so I feel highly anxious all the time & just fights constantly with his brother. My heart aches so much for my youngest as he just wants Max to be his best friend but he always gets rejected! They cannot be left in a room together...I’m finding it very hard!

Can anyone offer me any advise? I would really like to hear back from you and am hoping I could be of help to others too.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

Comments

  • Adrian_Scope
    Adrian_Scope Posts: 8,076

    Scope community team

    edited May 2019
    Hello @lovelymummylivi and welcome to the community!

    Your situation sounds very difficult and I can imagine it's quite a struggle to accept the dynamics on an emotional level. Hopefully you'll find lots of support here on the community and you might find our Parents and Carers discussion group the most useful.

    We also have some fantastic advisors here (including @SparkleSheffieldAutismAdvisors and @KellyParentAdvisor) who might be able to assist you. 

    I'm glad to hear you're signed up to Navigate. How long ago was Max diagnosed? Has Ted started school yet?
    Community Manager
    Scope

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  • SparkleSheffieldAutismAdvisors
    SparkleSheffieldAutismAdvisors Member Posts: 32 Pioneering
    Hi @lovelymummylivi and welcome!

    It's not easy being an autism parent, but (and I know its a cliche!) but things do get easier. All aspects come in a waves and this is just a tough ride on your way. 

    Are there any local support groups you can access? Speaking with other parents can reduce the feeling of loneliness, both face-to-face and online. Also, is your son's school able to give you any additional support, or hints, tips and advice of what works best while he's in school? Everything is generally trial and error, and the early years are often the hardest trying to work out what does and doesn't work for your son and your family, but please be assured that one day something will work for you and it'll make a small part of your life so much easier to deal with, and give you the strength to fight on with something new. 

    Please do stay in touch and if there's anything specific we can help with please do ask :smile:
  • steve51
    steve51 Member Posts: 7,154 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @lovelymummylivi

    Good Evening I’m also one of the “Community Champion’s” here at Scope.

    We have also got some good info/advice on “Aspergers on here.

    Please please let me know if that would be helpful ?????

    @steve51


  • lovelymummylivi
    lovelymummylivi Member Posts: 7 Listener
    Hi, 

    Sorry it’s taken my so long to reply on here....

    Thank you so so much for all responding and offering me your friendly support.

    So yes, Max is at school, year 2 & Ted is in Reception at the same school. Max received his diagnosis in Sept 18.

    I’m currently trying to arrange an appointment with Max’s class teacher & the SENCo but it’s proving to be a bit tricky. I know SATS are next week so am aiming for after the half term. 

    They attend a lovely little village school with 66 pupils across the 7 years however Max’s class is one of the biggest & has 3 year groups within it. His teachers are aware of his needs but struggling I think to come up with new ideas of how best to help him. Life is getting harder at home so my feeling is more support is needed at school but it’s knowing what we are and aren’t entitled to ask for as they aren’t regally forthcoming with anything!

    Any advise in readiness for this future appointment??

    With regards to groups etc, I really struggle to fit everything in as I’m also self employed. It does provoke a little anxiety on myself so this Scope Community is ideal. I’ve also met 2 other Mums with boys around the same age with the same needs, so they have been life savers.

    Any advise on Aspergers would also be massively helpful.....

    Thank you so much in advance...

    Livi 
  • Richard_Scope
    Richard_Scope Posts: 2,914

    Scope community team

    Hi @lovelymummylivi
    Great to have you as part of the community!
    Scope
    Specialist Information Officer and Cerebral Palsy Programme Lead

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