Paddie

Paddie

Hiya, I know from all the posts I read, that soooo many people are struggling.
However, despite the anguish & fustration, everyone "appears" so very brave!!
Totally the opposite to how I feel.
I just can not go on like this..... anymore.
I have "reached out" to EVERY "sign post" that should help me...... but the help never comes.
I just feel, I want to hurt myself.. the anxiety & depression I feel is just too overwhelming.
I can never express, completely, how I feel to the Dr's.
I just "clam up" like the small, timid & extremely frightened little girl I use to be & unfortunately, still am.
I truly, do not know what else I can do.
As alway's, I am on " on the verge" of taking my life.... 
Your Very fragile freind 
Paddie

Ami2301

Hi @Paddie sorry to hear how you are feeling.

If you are having thoughts of self harm or suicide, it is important that you discuss them with someone who is qualified to help. Please call the Samaritans on 116 123 (free) or email them at [email protected]

You might also benefit from reading MIND’s information on how you can help yourself now.

If you feel that you may be an immediate danger to yourself, please call 999 or go to your local hospital right away. 

Adrian_Scope

Hi @Paddie,
I think it can be very easy to look at how everyone else seems to be handling what comes their way and feel as if you're in a completely different boat. But there are a lot of people here who are probably struggling just as much.

When I speak to the doctor, I'm my own worst advocate. Rather than clam up, I tend to downplay everything to the point it almost feels like I'm trying to convince them that there's nothing wrong, or I describe my symptoms in the most concise and unfeeling terms, because I get embarrassed about being too emotive. Have you ever thought of preparing something before you speak to them?

Chloe_Scope

Hi @Paddie, was just wondering how you were getting on today?